Aggressive Colony Caretaker - Seeking Advice/input

futurecrayon

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Hello! I am new to this site and am seeking some advice on a situation with a person more so than a colony. My mom and I have cared for feral cats for about a year and a half now, maybe a little longer. I like to build shelters with insulation for cats in the winter and have been placing them around without any issues from other colony caretakers. The shelters always get used and this makes me incredibly happy for the cats! When we have very bad rain storms I will sometimes add a tarp on top of the shelters to create more protection from rain or snow.

One small colony I care for is tended to by someone who I have never met, but they are extremely aggressive and mean. They leave notes that say things such as, "get your own ******* colony!", "I've got cameras on you" (I know this not to be true because I have looked around the area and can't see any cameras anywhere), "stop ******* feeding these cats, they are cared for daily and you are ******* it up!", etc. I also added a tarp to a shelter that was already there to protect better from rain and snow, and this person removed the tarp and ground stakes completely, and didn't leave it for me to take back, yet they are now using cinder blocks I purchased on top of the shelter. They continually leave litter all over the area that I regularly clean up, and yet in their notes they also say things such as "stop trashing up the area!", which really makes no sense because they are the ones that leave a lot of trash. When I first installed the tarp I had to clean up an entire trash bag worth of garbage, and this person repeatedly leaves dry food out in cardboard containers, and then simply leaves a new one, not even cleaning up the old ones.

I am a very calm and collected person and this individual's aggressive approach to communication really scares me. It also makes me very sad and honestly offended that instead of leaving my property to take home, they took it. I've considered in the past leaving my number for this person to contact me so that I can understand their feeding schedule so I don't interfere with that, but the notes get more and more aggressive. I feel hesitant to communicate with them because they do not sound rational by any means. It also makes me feel sad that this person feels territorial of this particular colony, because I happen to know that many people in the neighborhood and the business development nearby care for these cats. I know cats will be ok without the editions I've added to the shelters as they are used to living outside, but I want to make sure these cats are comfortable and well cared for, and despite this person is leaving aggressive notes telling me the cats are ok, I do not feel that this person cares for the cats properly, especially if they think they are the only people who care for them.

Because I am relatively new to caring for colonies, I'm not entirely sure how to approach this. Should I just back off? Should I try to meet this person and let them know I'm not a threat? Has anyone else ever dealt with a particular mean colony caretaker that was territorial of their colony? Is this even normal?

I know this post is long but any information or advice would be greatly appreciated. The particular cats in this colony have lived in the area happily for over 10 years according to employees in the business development, who also feed the cats and offer them shelter in winter. What is especially weird about this situation is that one day when I was feeding the cats on one side of the road, someone shouted at me from the other side to feed them near the shelters so the cats don't have to cross the road, which is why I began feeding them in that area. Now, all this aggression. I wish I had taken the time to walk over and say hi that day but now I somehow doubt it'd make any difference.

Anyway, any input is deeply appreciated! This person scares me. :/ And I really enjoy caring for these kitties!
 

shadowsrescue

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I think it would be very important that all of the colony caretakers get together and talk about how to best care for the cats. Since you have only been doing this a year plus, there may be things about the cats that are unknown to you.

I would approach the situation saying you only have the cats best interest at heart. See what you can do to help even if it is only helping to buy the food. If you feel uncomfortable meeting this person alone, then I would take someone with you and meet in a public place.

I commend your dedication to the cats. It truly will be in the cats best interest if you meet and coordinate.
 

Furballsmom

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is this even normal?
No.

Should I try to meet this person and let them know I'm not a threat?
No, not even with someone else, because this person is very likely not going to care about anything you have to say.

Do you have other ways to care for cats that aren't being maintained by multiple entities? Can you and your mom explore those avenues, and step away from this?

That's my two cents/opinion, because of the aggressive, escalating nature of the communication from that person, and the fact that these particular cats have multiple caretakers. There's no percentage in pursuing this, and there are other cats who need you more :vibes::heartshape:
 

Sylvia Jones

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Back away. This person sounds dangerous. The notes make it clear they do not want your help. A situation like this can escalate very quickly. It seems like they are caring for the colony and that is good but there are too many red flags here for your safety. Perhaps the other people from the business could let you know if it looks like things change and the cats are no longer being cared for. It would be best for them to be aware of the hostility you have gotten from this person because it could also be directed at them. Please stay safe.
 
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futurecrayon

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Thank you so much everyone for your responses! I understand some people encouraging me to at least try to communicate with this person, but I also agree with other posters that this person sounds hostile and it's probably best to back away. We have alerted some staff who work in the building nearby about the situation just in case this harassment somehow escalates to them. (Like a new employee being unaware of the situation and deciding to help. The building is quite populated with different businesses and whenever people see the cats walking around, they will feed them if they can.)

We also did some Googling about feral colonies in this specific area and successfully identified this person! There is an entire article about her and the work she does, and her FB page has a photo of one of the cats at this specific colony. I feel a little less creeped out and safe knowing this persons identity, just in case this situation somehow gets worse, even though we are going to back off.

I think what makes it hard to back off is that even though she leaves notes saying the cats are fed daily, there is often proof this isn't true. Sometimes the cats are meowing loudly for food, or the one water bowl that is left out is knocked over for a few days in a row, so it's clear she doesn't always stop by daily. It seems she just wants to feel in control of the location. I feel that providing clean water is really important though, so while we plan to stop regular feeding, we are considering setting up a small spill-proof, self-filling water station on another side of the property. Relatively far away but not too far. The cats walk all over the development property, sometimes down the sidewalks just like people, so they will inevitably find it. They are so cute! :winkcat:

You are right Furballsmom that there are plenty of other cats that need our help, and potentially escalating this situation is not worth it.

Thank you so much again! :heartshape:
(I'm going to leave this thread up in the event someone else finds themselves in a similar situation seeking advice.)
 

fionasmom

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I think you hit the nail on the head when you said that she wants to feel in control. That is the crux of the matter even if she is not doing the best job of actually controlling the cats' welfare.

For many animal rescuers and caretakers, the important thing is to make the lives of needy animals easier. However, for a few, the care of animals overlaps with other issues in their lives like control, low self esteem, or an inability to relate successfully with people. Some set themselves up as animal saviors but do not necessarily live up to that commitment.

When I worked dog rescue years ago, a woman in the group rescued a small breed dog who was sick and evidently needed surgery. Another woman who was well off enough to pay for the surgery took the dog to her vet and all h*** broke loose because the original rescuer felt it was "her" dog. I still remember the insane conversation she initiated with me where she demanded to know, with the suggestion that I needed to agree with her, if someone had the right to provide medical care for an animal just because they could afford to. It was really butterfly net territory and I think that you have encountered that type of person.
 
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futurecrayon

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I think you hit the nail on the head when you said that she wants to feel in control. That is the crux of the matter even if she is not doing the best job of actually controlling the cats' welfare.

For many animal rescuers and caretakers, the important thing is to make the lives of needy animals easier. However, for a few, the care of animals overlaps with other issues in their lives like control, low self esteem, or an inability to relate successfully with people. Some set themselves up as animal saviors but do not necessarily live up to that commitment.

When I worked dog rescue years ago, a woman in the group rescued a small breed dog who was sick and evidently needed surgery. Another woman who was well off enough to pay for the surgery took the dog to her vet and all h*** broke loose because the original rescuer felt it was "her" dog. I still remember the insane conversation she initiated with me where she demanded to know, with the suggestion that I needed to agree with her, if someone had the right to provide medical care for an animal just because they could afford to. It was really butterfly net territory and I think that you have encountered that type of person.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts! I feel exactly the same. While I'm not happy you had to deal with someone who was upset that another person could help take care of a dog in need, it makes me feel better to hear this story and commiserate a bit. The way people will prioritize their own need for control over the welfare of animals they care for makes me very sad. I still can't get over the fact that this woman tore down the tarp I paid for and installed and probably threw it away. (I at least hope she's recycling it somehow? :ohwell:) I would love to install elevated winter shelters, or add proper winter insulation to the current shelters, or a larger water and food station, but I know at this point that it would make the situation worse. What really stinks the most about this situation is that we know the property owner and he would not at all mind us making these changes, as he likes the cats and wants them to be safe.

We are going to back off from that area but help in ways we can. Definitely going to put up the small water station and feed the cats when they are clearly very hungry, but in a different spot. This is day three of zero evidence of someone visiting, so we know she is absolutely not there on a daily basis like she claims in her aggressive notes. It's sad that her need for control is clouding her judgement, because it is so wonderfully convenient that our friend works in the building and is willing to help the cats five days a week!

Thank you so much for sharing your feelings and thank you everyone for the love! :redheartpump: It makes me so happy to talk with other people who feel passionate about animal welfare.
:hearthrob::happycat:
 

Cat20mom

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It sounds like this caretaker may have some mental health issues also. It certainly does not seem normal to me for someone to be THAT territorial over a colony that they would go to the extent of doing the things she is doing. I think I would leave her a note saying you in no way are trying to 'take over' her colony, but only have the cats' best interest at heart and want to help out in any way you can. Be sure to praise her for all she is doing for the cats-maybe that will soften her up. I get that you feel like you can't walk away since you are seeing signs that she is not always feeding/watering them daily. Good luck! Keep us posted.
 
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futurecrayon

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It sounds like this caretaker may have some mental health issues also. It certainly does not seem normal to me for someone to be THAT territorial over a colony that they would go to the extent of doing the things she is doing. I think I would leave her a note saying you in no way are trying to 'take over' her colony, but only have the cats' best interest at heart and want to help out in any way you can. Be sure to praise her for all she is doing for the cats-maybe that will soften her up. I get that you feel like you can't walk away since you are seeing signs that she is not always feeding/watering them daily. Good luck! Keep us posted.
I agree about the potential mental health issues. I actually did think to myself today that, despite the aggression, I am grateful that she helps in the ways that she can. This situation is so frustrating that I just really have to try and see the positives! We found an ideal area for a spill-proof water station and a nicely insulated winter shelter that is on the property of the business development, even closer to the workers who are able to care for the cats, but out of view of the other area this person interprets as their own. The property owner is fine with us doing this. When we install the water bowl I plan to leave a note saying just what you mention: that we have no intention of taking over her colony, we just want to help the cats in ways we can and we are grateful that she feeds them. (Even if we know she doesn't do it daily like she says.) We are feeling better that we've found a way to still provide what the cats need while staying away from "her" area.

Thanks so much again everyone for the interest and support! This woman really scared me at first so all the encouragement to be kind and just do what we can has really helped me. <3
 

fionasmom

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Does the property owner have any leverage with her? Like, "I don't mind you having the colony here and want to help the cats, but you need to keep it up if you want to continue?"
 
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futurecrayon

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Does the property owner have any leverage with her? Like, "I don't mind you having the colony here and want to help the cats, but you need to keep it up if you want to continue?"
Good question! The property situation is slightly complicated but I'll explain as best I can.

Imagine three rectangles side by side:
░ ░ ░
A B C

Property A is a mini mall with some shops.
Property B is a strip of woodsy area that is attached to property A.
Between B and C is a small road. (Parking for the business development with minimal slow traffic, so not very dangerous for the cats.)
Property C is the development where our friend works.

We know the property owner of C because they own and work in the building. The cat shelters the other woman set up are on A and B (like right on the line between the two). We do know the name of the property owner of B, but we have not contacted them. The reason we are setting up things the cats need on C is because if she interferes with anything, like leaving nasty notes or messes with our property on C, then we have reason to contact the property owner of C, and that owner can tell her to back off and care for the cats in "her" area on property A. The owner of one store on A is aware of her caring for the cats and has interacted with her before. He seems very nice and doesn't mind this woman providing care for the cats. So she has permission from her end of the situation, and we have permission from ours.

Our plan going forward is to back off from her area and provide consistent clean water and a nicely insulated shelter on C. (The shelters the other woman put out are fine, but they don't have insulation and I really worry about cats not having access to super-warm shelters in the winter, so I want to provide one or two on C as it grows colder outside.) Our friend who works at C isn't going to leave out food every day, but this is ok because sometimes when she sees the cats they are content. Cleaning themselves, lying in the grass. Other times they come to her meowing for food. She will be feeding them whenever they come to her, probably on days when the other woman didn't stop by the night before. So don't worry everyone, the cats will basically be fed on a daily basis! If we ever notice that they are consistently hungry to the extent we suspect that the other feeder is stopping by even less, we will definitely leave out food regularly if that ends up being the case. But for now we are going to consider this a group effort, even if she doesn't want to see it that way.

As I said before, despite her aggressive nature, we are still grateful that this woman cares for the cats at all, even if she does it differently from how we would do it. We want her to keep helping, but we also want to help just enough so that we know the cats are warm in fall/winter, hydrated, and fed whenever they are hungry. We do know that this colony has been TNR'd as well, so that is great.

At first I did want to leave a note as some people have suggested to let this person know we had no intention of taking over "her" colony and we are going to back off. However since we have set the situation up so that it works for everyone involved, and she does seem unstable, we are just going to back away from that situation. She can take care of the cats when she's able to, we can take care of them without her being able to interfere, and most importantly the cats are happy! :winkcat:

If anything else happens I'll let you all know! :catrub:
 

walli

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That sounds great! Backup plan for the cats! yay!
great job to you and your friends, that so warms my heart!
I wish there were more people like you in my area, we get negativity just caring for cats! My neighborhood has become more and more supportive, but my friend is still battling!
 

will2002

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This thread describes just one of many situations that causes me to like all cats so much more than most humans... This "Aggressive Colony Caretaker" must be the Halloween Witch, along with all of her cats. JMHO.
 

Furballsmom

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At first I did want to leave a note as some people have suggested to let this person know we had no intention of taking over "her" colony and we are going to back off. However since we have set the situation up so that it works for everyone involved, and she does seem unstable, we are just going to back away from that situation.
I'm glad. :vibes::heartshape:. :sunshine:
 

fionasmom

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Thank you so much for that detailed and very clear explanation. Your plan is very cohesive and seems to have you covered at property C. You are doing a great job for all these cats under a difficult circumstance.
 
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