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- #181
Hi there! I was thinking about how we decide the next step and wondering if it would help to see photos of the space? Or any other info that might help factor in?Great questions! In terms of their closed door interactions:
"she sometimes tries to bat at his paw when she can see him poking it under the door. That's when she is out and he is in." - That is normal.
" She can be distracted IMMEDIATELY. That's pretty much the same as before." - Ok, that is great, tells me it isn't that serious.
"When she is in her room and fussing the door and he is out, he sometimes tries to grab at the gate and rattle it a bit if she's making noise or fussing at the door. It's hard to tell if it's playful or a bit aggressive - it goes with his snorting and his fur is a little bit on end on his back. That's also the same as before. " - Ok
"That's literally the extent of their interactions. When he is in the room and crying she generally completely ignores it." - Ok, that is really good.
In terms of meeting/next steps:
"The office is fairly small, that's the only thing. There is a bed that she could go under and possibly be cornered, although the bed has an open bottom all around so cornering her under it would be almost just the same as cornering her without the bed. Everything else is open." - Ok. Is it possible to block that off? Does anyone go under there ever?
"Same basically goes for the main living area. The only trap is the sofa - either one could go under although there are multiple escapes out from under the sofa. Everything else is open and there are lots of height options - the table, the island, the counter so one could watch the other safely from a distance. It's a big room." - Ok, good
"Would seeing each other through the french door just lead to hissing/swatting at the glass?" - Not necessarily.
"Because then I could see maybe playing with one in the room with the French door and the other gets to be out and about and they can see each other but hopefully be distracted. And then maybe switching the next time." - Yes, that is exactly correct. I like the idea of using the french doors. It is definitely in the mix.
"Obviously part of me is tempted to just bite the bullet and see how it goes in-person and the other part is scared. " - Totally. I will only do what I think is best. The fact we are even thinking of a face to face is really good.
"But I have to remember this part is a process too - short first meeting, then longer, and so on. It doesn't have to perfect right away. " - Yes. We just don't want to have a negative encounter that sets us back. That is what I need to figure out.
"Also I'm sorry you had anxiety! It was hard to suddenly be disconnected from all the other cat folks! " - Oh, thank you. It was not your fault and luckily we left it without open questions. But I always worry if something negative happens. :/ BUT it didn't. The week has gone as I hoped/expected. Whew!!! It is just the unknown. :/
They wouldn't have forgotten about each other over the move, right? Like, even though they haven't seen each other, they know the other is there? I've been lulled into a false sense of security by their individual success in adapting to the new house, but I have no idea what to expect for them actually seeing each other again.