Pearl, my labrador who loved cats. RIP.
- Aug 28, 2016
- Colorado, USA
A quick note that we didn't do a face-to-face last night. For some reason, they were extra testy last night. She came up to the gate a couple of times wanting out, and then Hawthorne ran over to the gate to try to bonk her. He can never just ignore it. Then at one point, she didn't run away but crouched just out of reach and that really made him mad - so he was pacing at the gate, with his back fur a bit puffed, trying to find a way to get to her, while she was hissing away and pulling back, with her ears tucked against her head. I hadn't seem them like that in awhile - I thought we were passed that. I couldn't distract him with my voice, either. All of a sudden I felt concerned that maybe he DOES want to harm her, at certain times.
Eventually he left it (maybe ten or fifteen seconds) and they calmed down again. They did their treat time through the gate before bed with no issues. Things seem to be fine today - they did puzzles as usual, and are leaving each other alone.
I get the sense there are small changes (like, maybe she comes closer to the gate, or doesn't run away as far, or he's bored, or she looks at him funny, who knows) that he senses that I don't see, and that maybe set him off. Like Graham18 , sometimes her growling also sets him off. They both are still reactive to the other in certain ways - setting off each other's insecurities.
Sigh. Feels sometimes like we are working hard against the current! But there will always be good days and bad. So big picture!
Anyways, hopefully we'll try another face-to-face soon.
I checked in to see how things were going and wow! They are going.
As calico says they will be fine, in my opinion!
2 steps forward, 1 step back. It's hardly ever totally linear. They have spats and get over it. I've felt with mine the progress isn't lost, just a spat.
For me, I can now let Ziggy out in the house 24/7, after 18 months. I was having her in her room at night so the others could run and play at will without being chased. They have arrived!!
It will happen with yours, mine were at the point of yours and there will be more progress. They learn over time to not fear each other, that they don't need to fear.
And sometimes mine get hissy/swattie (like irritated) at each other but it always ends and it's over, with no hard feelings.
Keep a' goin'!