Adopt Or Not?

Discussion in 'Grooming & General Cat Care' started by lisa1706, Jul 17, 2017.

  1. lisa1706

    lisa1706 Thread Starter TCS Member Young Cat

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    Sep 3, 2015
    Indianapolis IN USA
    Hi everyone! I recently adopted a 2 year old abysinnian mix from a shelter. I had no idea what breed she was but apparently her breed is very chatty. She meows and grunts a lot. I have anxiety so some days it's unnerving. A freind recently found some 1 week old abandoned kittens in his yard. They are now 2 weeks and doing well in the care of a rescue. I want to adopt one. My current kitty Desiree might like a playmate and a new cat may help her pipe down. She is very acive. Not at all cuddly. I'm hoping the new kitten will be a cuddle bug. Im on a budget so that's to be considered. I'd love to give this kitten a home. Her name is Patience. She is a little calico. A new kitty might help me and Desiree and be a great home for Patience or it might be a disaster. I work 8 hours per day so I know Desiree is lonely. I just lost Punkin. I had her 20 years so learning a new cat has been challenging. What are your thoughts? If only we had a crystal ball! Adopt or not?
     
  2. Letta

    Letta TCS Member Adult Cat

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    Apr 18, 2017
    Hi,
    Well I can't tell you to adopt or not. But here are some thoughts. First you will need to wait until she is 8 weeks old to adopt her so you have a bit more time to think about it, right now she is completely depend and not ready at all. I am not sure how much it will help Desiree to stop chatting, if it is part of her personality it's part of her personality. It will probably help with the boredom but she will probably still want to tell you in details about her day. If you do adopt the kitten you should know that it will take time (weeks may be) and work for your current cat to accept the new kitten. You will need to seperate them at first, cats are very territorial and they need time to accept a new friend. So bare in mind that if you adopt her it will be stressing for a while ( Desiree will be upset, growl and hiss, and she will need time to like Patience).
    If you think that Desiree is bored maybe you could play with her. Buy a Dabird or cat catcher and play with her 20 min when you come back home, it will help her bond with you.
    For the cuddle bug part you have no way of knowing how your new kitten will be. Most kitten if correctly socialized are cuddly, but that does not mean that they stay like that. Moreover a kitten needs a lot of work from you side, she will need a lot of interaction with you and play time if you want her to grow up in a social cat. So be ready to dedicate a big portion of your time home to her at the beginning. She still has so much to learn and you will need to be there for her. If you just want a calm lap cat, I would suggest more to think about adult cats. Go to your shelter ask for a calm and affectionate cat who is already 3+ years. Spend time with the cat, see if she will come and settle on your lap or not. If you go there a few times you should find a perfectly nice lap cat who will not be as active. However, now that the introductions with your current cat will be probablly be harder and take more time, as introducing an adult is harder.
    I hope that helps.
     
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  3. ArtNJ

    ArtNJ TCS Member Adult Cat

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    Jun 1, 2017
    Never adopt a second cat because you imagine your first cat will benefit, because that is very uncertain, and your first cat may end up being very stressed by the new cat. As you seem to already know, even a well managed introduction can sometimes turn into a total disaster as one cat causes the other great stress/terror. With you having anxiety issues, how would you react to constant growling, hissing and fighting? Abyssians are known for being athletic and active, so to imagine a kitten will calm one down...wishful thinking I'm afraid. What you would have going for you is that your older cat is still young and very active, so there would likely be a temperment match with the young kitten, which does make problems somewhat less likely. Still, with you having anxiety I don't know that I'd risk it. You might do better trying to play with the abyssian more, tire it out. A lot of times one can find situations where a non-lap cat will tolerate and eventually seek affection. Maybe when they are sleepy. Or in a certain spot. What you can't do is keep plopping the cat on your lap if they don't like that, and especially never try to hold the cat down imagining it will calm down. They have to be the boss.

    I had one cat that would let me pet him on top of my clothes dresser, and another when he was on the back of my chair. If you go with the flow, you and/or the cat can gradually add more situations, and the cat may even give your lap a try at some point. Good luck!
     
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  4. PushPurrCatPaws

    PushPurrCatPaws TCS Member Top Cat

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    :yeah: Excellent advice!
     
  5. Summercats

    Summercats TCS Member Adult Cat

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  6. lisa1706

    lisa1706 Thread Starter TCS Member Young Cat

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    Sep 3, 2015
    Indianapolis IN USA
    Hi..I decided to just get to know Desiree better. Im happy to report she has settled in nicely. She has not been so chatty. I think she was nervous. She has been through a lot in her young life. I know she has had at least one litter before I got her then was dropped at a shelter pregnant then put in a foster home to have her kittens. She stopped eating to the point she stopped producing milk. Then they hauled her back to the shelter. She still talks a lot but not too much. My nerves are better. She sleeps through the night now. She will let me hold hold her only in the bathroom. She actually jumped in my lap the other day. She didnt stay and and I didnt touch her. So...
    Still not a lap cat. But its ok. I was considering adopting a kittten before the end of the year but Desiree seems content so maybe I wont rock the boat..we just moved to an apartment with a lake view and plenty of wildlife for her to view from the window. I feel like we are slowly bonding. Thanks for asking.
     
  7. blueyedgirl5946

    blueyedgirl5946 TCS Member Veteran

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    Congratulations. It sounds like she will have a wonderful home.
     
  8. lisa1706

    lisa1706 Thread Starter TCS Member Young Cat

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    Sep 3, 2015
    Indianapolis IN USA
    20170915_234912.jpg Thank u!
     
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  9. rubysmama

    rubysmama TCS Member Top Cat

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    Canada
    Awwww... she's really pretty. And looks pretty content too. I suspect once she gets a bit older, you too will be best buds.

    And, you know, meowing isn't always a bad thing. I like when I talk to Ruby and she replies. Least then I don't feel like I'm talking to myself. :)
     
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  10. Mr i need help asap

    Mr i need help asap TCS Member Kitten

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    Sep 15, 2017
    Awww looks like you two became best friends im starting to think cats are just shy and nevervous complicated fury friends and u need patiance p.s cats hate being put on ur lap i try make her sit on my lap she went to sleep mad at me i think they love being the boss if ur lucky they will listen to you maybe
     

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  11. lisa1706

    lisa1706 Thread Starter TCS Member Young Cat

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    Sep 3, 2015
    Indianapolis IN USA
    Pretty pic
     
  12. Mr i need help asap

    Mr i need help asap TCS Member Kitten

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    Sep 15, 2017
    Thank you yours as well
     
  13. Summercats

    Summercats TCS Member Adult Cat

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    Sep 19, 2017
    Oh great - She is a beautiful kitty!
     
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