- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #21
- Joined
- Jun 15, 2016
- Messages
- 80
- Purraise
- 64
Grief, resentment, and numbness are emotions, just as love and anger are. All emotions are created by experiences, not by the individuals decision to have them. Acting or not acting on them is a decision, honoring the emotions you feel is important. If someone tells you to get over an emotion, ignore them. It is the same as if they told you to get over having a hand or fingers.
More than anything I understand your grief is precious and honor to D2 and you don't want to share it with those who don't understand. That is all right too. It's not your burden to explain to others how you feel, only to feel and avoid things that make east step harder to take.
D2 doesn't care how they feel, he gave them a chance to know him and they didn't take it. You did. For that he will be with you forever, helping you always.
Right now I'm grieving and resentful of the fact that I couldn't have control by bringing D2 into the house. I hate it so much that I never had the experience of welcoming D2 into our house and sitting down with him on my lap. He was so friendly and I think that he'd have done that, unlike the two cats that we have. I love our two inside cats too, but neither of them have ever wanted to be held from the time we got them as kittens. It would have been so nice to sit down and watch tv with D2 feeling at home in my lap and feeling his kneading. He'd purr and knead (I say 'make bread') every time I'd go outside to see him. He'd even be standing there eating and I could hear his rumble and see his feet doing the bread thing, even while I was watching him eat his food I'd give him. I loved standing there and watching him seem so appreciative that he didn't have to worry about where he was going to get his next meal. Of course, I couldn't read his mind and I had no idea if he could think that way, but that's how I interpreted his behaviors. He wasn't demanding like our inside cats can be so often; I really think that he was probably just happy that someone took pity on him. It was a pleasure, even in 30° weather to spend some time with him outside, as little as I feel that it was. I wish I didn't feel gypped out of more time, though, that I could have spent with him.Grief, resentment, and numbness are emotions, just as love and anger are. All emotions are created by experiences, not by the individuals decision to have them. Acting or not acting on them is a decision, honoring the emotions you feel is important. If someone tells you to get over an emotion, ignore them. It is the same as if they told you to get over having a hand or fingers.
More than anything I understand your grief is precious and honor to D2 and you don't want to share it with those who don't understand. That is all right too. It's not your burden to explain to others how you feel, only to feel and avoid things that make east step harder to take.
D2 doesn't care how they feel, he gave them a chance to know him and they didn't take it. You did. For that he will be with you forever, helping you always.
He will always be in my heart and I've decided that I will grieve for him as long as I want. I hate it when people try to make me feel like I should be doing things the way that they do it. I'm pretty much an emotional person and that's who I am. I don't consider it a fault of mine despite what others might think about my being the way I am. I don't like feeling inferior to someone who can hold it together in the situation that I'm in right now. I'm grief-stricken because of losing D2. I know it might sound heartless but I feel like I'm grieving more for this wonderful cat than I'll be capable of doing when my own mother passes. My positive or negative experiences with people and animals affect my emotions. If I didn't have what I'd call a happy childhood, then it will be difficult for me to feel much grief. The feelings that I've always had towards D2 were so pleasant that it would be impossible for me not to love him. I will cherish the time that he spent here.
Being able to come here and talk to people who are so understanding and compassionate has helped me a lot. It's making it easier for me to cope with this. I can come here and not feel ridiculed. I can be myself and not have to pretend that I'm happy because I'm not. I even had the comment made to me (I guess because I've been moping around because of missing D2), "I think that you don't even want to live anymore." Also, he says that he feels that we've lost a connection. Well, gee, I wonder why! If he can't figure that out, I'm not about to explain it because that would just end up with me feeling like I should be someone different than who I am. Thank goodness there are others on here who know just what I'm going through and don't mind taking the time to make me feel better and not feel like everything is my fault. I appreciate that so much.