6 Yr Old Cat Super Anxious And Scared With Arrival Of 13 Week Kitten, Advice?

[BubzaLuna]

Hey everyone thought I'd come back and give updates on how today has been with the kitty's, there has been good and bad moments (but mainly good). So all day today resident cat has been absolutely fine, super friend and eating lots of treats (not much of her main food), whilst little kitten has also been her usual lovely self. At about 8pm tonight resident cat came downstairs for some food so I emptied her some meat into her bowl and put it next to the door where kitten was on the other side, unfortunately I think the kittens shadow under the door took resident cat by surprise as she hissed (hadn't done this at all for over 24 hours) and also meowed at me when I went to touch her. When she calmed down my partner went to see her and she did strike at him a couple of times but he said she didn't use her claws, it was just a hard smack. We left it even longer and decided to try something completely new. I sat in resident cats room with her and played her favourite game whilst my partner held the kitten in his arms and he edged closer. Resident cat hissed only once and it was when my partner let the kitten out of his arms, after this there was no hissing and by the end of the edging closer resident cat and kitten were maybe 3ft away, there was no hissing and apart from a few intense stares resident cat continued to play with me despite the kitten being so close. So it seems that resident cat seems safest when she is next to either me or my partner whilst the other holds the kitten. As I said it's been a good day but when resident cat saw the kittens shadow I just think it made her jump.

 

[rubysmama]

Sounds good. When they get near each other like that, do you give them both, particularly your resident cat something yummy so she will associate the kitten with good things?

 

[BubzaLuna]

Sounds good. When they get near each other like that, do you give them both, particularly your resident cat something yummy so she will associate the kitten with good things?

Unfortunately she won't eat when the kitten is around her once the kitten is put away we bombard them both with treats, but resident cat just sniffs them when kitten is near by. The playing was a huge step up because previously when she saw the kitten (not behind a door) she would literally just sit and stare, unresponsive to both me and my partner.

 

[rubysmama]

So today is only the 4th day with the new kitten, right. So I think things are going well. Definitely improving, not getting worse, so that's good.

 

[BubzaLuna]

More updates today -

Both resident cat and kitten sat on mine and partners double bed today, resident cat at bottom of bed and kitten on pillows. Resident cat is the one that got up there, despite knowing kitten was there. Kitten also decided to climb on resident cats cat tower whilst resident cat was asleep on it lol! They were literally 2ft away and even when resident cat saw kitten she just watched for a couple seconds before laying back down. It was only when kitten tried to get even closer that resident cat hissed. There was also an incident on the stairs where resident cat charged down them only to get the shock of her life when she bumped into kitten at the bottom my partner said resident cat jumped out of her skin, hissed/growled and then ran back upstairs! She's had a little redirected aggression today but not much.

 

[susanm9006]

Expect there will be hissing and slapping in the coming days but it is all progress towards,becoming friends.

 

[BubzaLuna]

So this morning kitten tried to play with resident cat, who retaliated by trying to slap her lol kitten jumped back and then it was fine. About 5 minutes later they were 30cm from eachother just staring, resident cat was grumbling to start but did calm down and only hissed/growled when kitten moved or me and my partner moved. She had some treats as soon as kitten walked out. She's now in her safe room to chill out and be alone for a bit.

 

[BubzaLuna]

A couple of pictures of their close encounters lol!

 

[rubysmama]

As long as your resident cat is eating/sleeping/using the litter box normally, and doesn't seem stressed, and if the kitten doesn't seem scared, and that there is no fur flying or blood, then things are probably fine. There will be some hissing/growling/swatting by your older cat, as she tries to teach the kitten "manners". But things seem to be progressing quite well.

 

[BubzaLuna]

As long as your resident cat is eating/sleeping/using the litter box normally, and doesn't seem stressed, and if the kitten doesn't seem scared, and that there is no fur flying or blood, then things are probably fine. There will be some hissing/growling/swatting by your older cat, as she tries to teach the kitten "manners". But things seem to be progressing quite well.

Kitten isn't scared at all, she's desperate for her and resident cat to be friends lol. Resident cat had a bad turn tonight, didn't find out how bad as I grabbed the kitten and got her out the situation. Resident cat was playing in the hallway and I don't think she could see the kitten, and the kitten decided to charge at the toy the resident cat was playing with and resident cat screeched and went for the kitten with her paw. I don't know whether she just intended to swat her or what because I managed to move the kitten, but she did only put her paw out, and I imagine she'd have gone head first had she wanted to bite etc. They've been ok all day, resident cat also poked her head on the chair that kitten was sleeping on, then they were sleeping in the same room in sight of eachother.

 

[susanm9006]

This may be difficult for you but you need to step back and let your resident cat swat the kitten. This is the way the kitten will learn the other’s boundaries. Interference just lengthens the time it takes. Your older cat may swat the kitten, hold it down and even seemingly bite it but unless the kitten seems to really be getting hurt,which is unlikely just let it play out.

 

[BubzaLuna]

This may be difficult for you but you need to step back and let your resident cat swat the kitten. This is the way the kitten will learn the other’s boundaries. Interference just lengthens the time it takes. Your older cat may swat the kitten, hold it down and even seemingly bite it but unless the kitten seems to really be getting hurt,which is unlikely just let it play out.

Thanks for this advice. My partner keeps telling me this also but I am struggling so much with it I am so terrified she's gonna hurt the kitten and we aren't gonna be able to get her off the kitten or something, the idea of the kitten being beaten up or bleeding just traumatises me, so I don't know what id be like if I actually witnessed it. I've asked my partner to do all the close encounter interactions whilst I'm at work as he deals with the situations much better . And with me out the house there will be no stress lol. My god this is all so horrible, what a stressful week it has been

 

[susanm9006]

Most cats have a built in instinct not to hurt a kitten. They may make a lot of noise, hold the kitten down and even nip at them but not to the point of harming them. If the kitten is truly obnoxious they can give them a wack that lets the kitten know they mean business but again not enough to really harm them.

 

[BubzaLuna]

So resident cat today decided to walk up to kitten and sniff her from behind with no aggression at all, very good. However this afternoon has been a bit more rocky as the kitten his behind our big bin and resident cat was trying to swipe her from behind it whilst growling and hissing. Resident cat has also swiped at my partner a few times today so I think she needs a break lol!

 

[BubzaLuna]

Hey guys, sorry for the double post but we have finally sussed the reason for the cats manic behaviour, it's me, she hates it when the kitten is near me. I don't know why I never thought about it before since she has got terrortotial in the past, my partner's ex housemate and me didn't get on at all, hated eachother in fact, and when Mr and my cat moved into their flat for a bit she hated the housemate so much that she would guard wherever I was sat and she would hiss and growl at him for even coming near me. If we have visitors and I'm in the house she will also be tempremental with them, but when I'm not here she is fine. All day today the cat and kitten have been perfect, they've sniffed eachother, walked by eachother, everything fine. Since I've been home however resident cat has gone for the kitten twice extremely viciously , once because the kitten tried to follow me up the stairs and the other because the kitten jumped up onto my lap. I guess with them having close encounters it's made it easier to figure out the problem, but idk if this makes the entire thing even harder..do you have any advice? Thanks

 

[rubysmama]

Here's a TCS article that might be helpful: Do Cats Get Jealous? (and What To Do About It When They Do)

 

[BubzaLuna]

A couple updates: Resident cat and kitten sniffed eachothers faces this morning, but apart from that it's still hostile on resident cats end. It's been just over a week now part of me thinks that resident cat just won't ever get on with her and we'll have to re-home the kitten, which makes me extremely sad.

 

[rubysmama]

There's no guarantee that your resident cat will accept the kitten, but it's only been 1 week, so it's way too early to despair. Cat introductions can take several weeks, even when it's between an adult cat and a kitten.

What type of hostility is she displaying now?

 

[BubzaLuna]

There's no guarantee that your resident cat will accept the kitten, but it's only been 1 week, so it's way too early to despair. Cat introductions can take several weeks, even when it's between an adult cat and a kitten.

What type of hostility is she displaying now?

Well she's still super terrified that the kitten is going to hurt her, when they are around eachother resident cat is so on edge. There's no show of dominance, when she goes for the kitten it's more like a fight or flight reaction. We bought the kitten a massive pen yesterday that we've set up in the lounge so they can have longer close encounters without me and my partner constantly having to observe.

Yesterday they got face to face and smelt noses, but 5 minutes later resident cat is back to growling , hissing and trying to swipe.

 

[rubysmama]

We bought the kitten a massive pen yesterday that we've set up in the lounge so they can have longer close encounters without me and my partner constantly having to observe.

Funny, I was thinking "I wonder if putting the kitten in a carrier would help", then I read the above. Hopefully it will help.