3 Years Ago Tonight We Put Simon Down

[les26]

May 15th, 3 years ago, I held Simon as the vet put him down, he had stomach cancer and there was nothing that could be done, it was too late. 3 years yet I still have that awful feeling, can remember the whole thing like it just happened 3 hours ago. I remember how unusually hot it was that night, how I slept for a bit then woke up in a panic attack, had to go outside at 2:00 in the morning but couldn't get away from it, remember how for quite awhile I couldn't be in the dark after that, how it freaked me out as did being enclosed in the shower. It's funny how strangely grief and stress can come out in you, but with time it passed, just feeling it today as I know what day this is. But the plant that we planted back then in his memory is so full and beautiful, and I know he is happy and just fine. And he is happy that we took in Sylvester who looks like him and Sebastian mixed together; I scooped him up tonight and said "I need a Sylvester hug", he immediately started purring and I held him up towards a picture of Simon and said "do you know this guy? I think he's in here somewhere", and told Deb "I feel like I am holding all three at the same time".

He is fine and I am too, it just hits home on THE day, the memories never fade, he was such a great, fun loving tuxedo but he is fine now, no more pain.

 

[meelasmom]

I am so sad for your loss..but I am slightly encouraged that things can get better.
I had to drive by the animal clinic where Meela was put down and I just couldn't stop the tears.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Hugs.

Rest you gentle, Simon, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

 

[di and bob]

That day will be seared in our memories until the day we die, I remember not being able to sleep in my bed for a month because the site of her not being there was just too painful.She loved the ritual of bedtime, chasing the boys off the bed if they came too near HER spot. To this day, Burt will not go near a lump in the covers.
Les26, you have helped countless others by comforting them on this forum, I am so thankful you continue to do so. I know this site brings on feelings we would rather forget, but remembering how we felt on that fateful day brings us back, NO ONE should have to go through that alone.
Dear sweet Simon, I pray you have found your perfect spot in the sun, and are dreaming of mice and climbing trees and most of all of the one who misses you so dearly. Your tiny soul is intertwined with another, the love you hold for each other will never die. Sleep tight, little Prince!

 

[Antonio65]

Three hours, three months or three years... it doesn't change much, our hearts keep hurting no matter how back in time it happened.
Tears run from my eyes everytime someone asks me about my sweet Lola, who passed away nearly 7 weeks ago.
But it's the same when they ask me about Tom, who went to the Rainbow Bridge 44 months ago.
Those hard moments look like carved on granite, they are always clear, they will never fade away.
I'm sure that Simon still loves you and is near to you.

 

[les26]

Thank you all for your kind words, I really appreciate it. Simon was just such a funny cat, great personality, I can still see him rolling around by himself on the carpet, kicking himself in the stomach, rolling around and the more that you talked to him the more he would do it lol! Still see him all alone upstairs laying on the bed by himself like the King, he didn't care one lick about the other cats he was his own cat! Still see him the first one in the kitchen, boy how he loved to eat, now Sylvester is the first one in just like he was....

When we got Sylvester and I consulted an animal communicator who is truly amazing, certainly not a hoax as she has proven many times to many of us that she is spot on with her assumptions, I also mentioned Simon to her, and she said that his spirit is still at home with us because he LOVED it here, and also that she felt him being very much relieved because he was in pain from the stomach cancer. I still remember him throwing up a lot of green liquid in the kitchen one morning, and I thank God that it was me who saw that not Deb, but he got very sick very fast, it was sudden and catastrophic but as we know cats hide illness well, and I still remember calling him like I used to and even though he wasn't well he STILL came up a few steps to see me, his spirit and bond was so strong, now I'm crying again.....but he still came upstairs to see me. I remember at the vet, asking so many times "are you SURE there is nothing that can be done, he looks so good yet?", but them saying he looks good outside but inside he is very sick, still remember holding him and feeling his body go limp, kissing him and holding him and telling him that we loved him, still remember like I said the anxiety and stress of losing him, but it is normal to remember the BAD things, we must dwell on the good things instead, and for some reason I think since I now have Sylvester who surely reminds me of him and Sebastian about 1,000 times a day it just hit me harder this year, but I know he is just fine, and he would be sad to know that I am sad, so I will keep my chin up and forge on, and whenever I feel sad Sylvester is getting a hug!!!

Thanks again,

Les

 

[dorymb]

What a lovely piece about your Simon. Thank you for sharing. Funny, but when you described Simon rolling around, I could see my Cleo. You could sweet talk her into rolling around for you. It was so cute.

 

[Carmine]

May 15th, 3 years ago, I held Simon as the vet put him down, he had stomach cancer and there was nothing that could be done, it was too late. 3 years yet I still have that awful feeling, can remember the whole thing like it just happened 3 hours ago. I remember how unusually hot it was that night, how I slept for a bit then woke up in a panic attack, had to go outside at 2:00 in the morning but couldn't get away from it, remember how for quite awhile I couldn't be in the dark after that, how it freaked me out as did being enclosed in the shower. It's funny how strangely grief and stress can come out in you, but with time it passed, just feeling it today as I know what day this is. But the plant that we planted back then in his memory is so full and beautiful, and I know he is happy and just fine. And he is happy that we took in Sylvester who looks like him and Sebastian mixed together; I scooped him up tonight and said "I need a Sylvester hug", he immediately started purring and I held him up towards a picture of Simon and said "do you know this guy? I think he's in here somewhere", and told Deb "I feel like I am holding all three at the same time".

He is fine and I am too, it just hits home on THE day, the memories never fade, he was such a great, fun loving tuxedo but he is fine now, no more pain.

RESPONSE:
Good evening..Oh my, Please see my posting in the health section about " Cat Exposure to Neurological Toxin Observation ". This is about my " Simon ". He was a very special cat to me..He was 2 years old when I got him from the SPCA in Richmond, VA where I live.. He was returned for no reason other than the couple did not want him anymore as they adopted a pregnant cat and when the kittens were to be born ,then they said Simon would be a danger to the kittens.[ their loss was my gain] as I adopted him the first week of June 2004.. So he just turned 15 years old and I have enjoyed him for almost 13 years.
If you read about my Simon and can come up with any insight please let me know..If he ever comes back to me it will be a true miracle !!. I miss him so much. Maybe I am just getting old and my emotions are just becoming more sensitive. I have had 7 adult cats in sequence since 1978...With over laps of some. Some living as long as Boris and Becky [ brother and sister ] who died of natural causes 3 months apart in 1994 at age 16 + years old. I was prepared for their death as they both died of kidney failure..But to have Simon disappear in possible and probable foul play is very ,very difficult to fathom in even a fleeting thoughts and memories.!
I do agree whole heartedly with you..the feelings can come up so quickly when connecting to the time of the
tragedy or series of events..
Thank you for sharing your story with us.. Carmine.

 

[les26]

Last night it finally dawned on me WHY I probably am feeling so emotional about Simon's anniversary this time, as I was looking at Sylvester it hit me, we had him shaved down about 3 weeks ago because he had become so matted, and now his hair is shorter and his face looks like Simon so there you go! When he was furrier as you can see in the picture in the avator, he resembled Sebastian more because Sebastian was a long haired Chantilly, but now he looks like a thinner version of Simon with Sebastian's plume tail lol!!!

Like I said, he is a 50/50 blend of BOTH boys, but his shorter hair makes him resemble Simon more now! Ha ha!!!

 

[Mia6]

I am so sorry about Simon's anniversary. They are so hard and I know about panic attacks as lately
I am having them daily.

Even though we know they are free from pain, and happy and healthy at the bridge, we still miss them
ever so much.

Hugs,

Mia

 

[les26]

Last night I was petting Sylvester as he was standing by his dry food bowl "pushing" me for treats as usual ha ha, and I was thinking about how with his short haircut he looks like Simon more now, and I said to him "is Simon in there?" and as if on cue he opened his mouth a little bit to reveal his teeth and he made a short noise almost like a purr/growl sound that Simon used to do when you would pet him and he would get so excited! Now that was freaky, but in a good way!!! And he had never made that noise before and we have had him 15 months now, so I guess Simon and Sylvester were answering my question!!!

 

[meelasmom]

It's something to feel comfort in. I feel my Meela every so often. Its a jump and footsteps on my bed with no cats around. I truly believe it's her. They are light but noticeable. I always say. "Meela, is that you?". It just has to be her.

I'm sure you will find other signs that you baby is with you, too.

 

[les26]

I'm sure that it is Meela, she loved it there and her spirit wants to stay with you and that is comforting. True love never dies......