3 Months After Bringing In A New Cat, We're Still Struggling

[Mamanyt1953]

There are some REALLY nice cat shelf systems out there, designed to blend with almost any and every decor. And they range from "I can do that easily" to "OH MY GOD, WHERE'S THE LOTTO TICKET???"

 

[adequately]

There are some REALLY nice cat shelf systems out there, designed to blend with almost any and every decor. And they range from "I can do that easily" to "OH MY GOD, WHERE'S THE LOTTO TICKET???"

Yeah, I know that feeling... we're going to try tiring them out with daily group play and will pursue a shelf system if there's still trouble.

Here's an update: still some howling and chasing following wrestling, but bringing out a toy helps.

Can't tell if Cat 1 is actually spraying or just being weird, since he's not backing up to any surface. He's just peeing standing up - I know this is a sign of a UTI, but he doesn't always do it. We will still get him checked out at a vet if it continues.

Cat 2 is still having lots of trouble - because I'm nothing but thorough, here's a map of the apartment with litter boxes in red and all the places where he goes in purple

Box 1 & Box 5 are his favorites for peeing. Box 3 used to be in the spot where Box 4 is now - that spot just outside of it is by far the place where he goes most often, but always on the cardboard we use as a litter mat, and we replace the cardboard every time he goes so i don't think it's scent.

The bed is covered in a vinyl cover that we got after he started having accidents, but last night he want on it again even with the cover.

Sometimes, he will go in a box, pop out to get a treat (trying for positive reinforcement), but then immediately go back in and go again on the floor next to the box.

I know having all the boxes in the spare bedroom like that isn't the best, but as I mentioned we're in a small unit and don't have many options.

Box 6 used to be our only box before we got Cat 2 - Cat 1 used it religiously and we never had any problems. We got Box 1 when we brought Cat 2 home and Cat 1 switched to that - he would use the top entry occasionally. Last week, we moved it from the spare bedroom out to the living room and no one has touched it.

Any ideas on things to try? We feel like we have so many different shapes and sizes of box with three brands of litter (1 pine, 2 clay). But he's still going outside the boxes.

 

[KarenKat]

I love the diagram! My only comment is that Box 6 being right next to the front door might not be secluded enough for them to feel comfortable .. there is a lot of hustle and bustle by front doors and they could be too nervous to use it where it is.

 

[marmoset]

Great diagram! I'm now wondering if cat 2 has a medical issue. Have you brought him to a vet for the out-of-box pooping? How are the stools? If he had a tummy issue when the problem started then it could be purely behavioral as he would associate pain with the pooping in the litter box or it could be that he still does have pain if it is an ongoing condition. If you do go to the vet bring the diagram.

Something else you could try is to set up a litter box (maybe box 4, which cat 1 doesn't favor and is where cat 2 does) without the litter and use something flat like puppy pads, newspaper or even a sheet of cardboard since that is what he is going on now and see if he will poop there. Then once he's used to that start adding a little litter gradually until he's retrained.

 

[jen]

Problem 2: Playtime & down time. I mentioned before that Cat 1 doesn't understand hissing. Cat 2 is great with self-directed play. He's always batting toys around, leaving feathers all over, etc. They often groom each other, which is so cute to see. But other times, Cat 1 decides he wants to play, and it's totally unlike what Cat 2 is used to. Cat 1 will chase him all over, kind of chomping at his rear haunches and batting. We know from experience with Cat 1 that this is how he plays, the chomps are playful and paws are always claws in. You can tell that Cat 2 takes it as an attack, and will eventually end up under the dresser or recliner. When he's cornered, it turns into a tussle with hissing and howling from Cat 2. And Cat 1, again not understanding social cues, just keeps coming. He still thinks it's a game.

Cat 2 will also lay down on top of Cat 1 when he's laying in his bed or on the cat tree until Cat 1 gets up so Cat 2 can get the spot. It seems like some weird power play.

We're so frustrated, because half the time they are so sweet together, grooming each other and snuggling while they nap. Our cat sitter once told us that they act like they're litter mates! But we don't know how to correct any of this behavior - we don't know how to show Cat 2 that Cat 1 is just playing, don't know how to tell Cat 1 to chill out with the chasing, don't know how to solve the litterbox problems.

I just went back to your original post to reply because I only want to talk about their behavior. I am also sure others have replied similarly but I don't have the time to read through the whole post.

This is all normal. Your cats understand hissing and social cues perfectly fine they sometimes just don't care and keep going at it, which is why then it ends in a bit of a tussle. If there is no bloodshed then IGNORE IT. Let them be. They are perfectly fine and happy together. Cats play REALLY rough and that is what they do. They tell the other how they are feeling about it by hissing, growling, etc. This is how they communicate. You cannot stop or discourage this or they will never learn each others boundaries and you will end up with neurotic cats lol. The reason I confidently can say, in all my years of helping people with cat behavior issues, that they are perfectly fine, is from the second part I quoted. There is no behavior you need to correct here, they need to work it out themselves and they will. Stop being frustrated as it only stressed them out.

 

[adequately]

Thanks, Jen. I'm beginning to think the users saying similar things are right. Last night, I ignored some screaming and they were hopping up into bed with us and falling asleep five minutes later. This morning they were going at it under the bed, but when we woke up later they were just kind of casually wrestling on the bed. I'm also seeing lots of users in other threads offhandedly mentioning how horrific male play can sound, and that makes me feel better.

As for the vet, we haven't gone yet. We've had some disagreements with our current vet and have been looking for a new one. But I think a positive update - on Sunday, we switched from NutriSource to Weruva BFF wet food for Cat 2 (Georgie), and he's on a 36-hour litter box streak! All in Box 4, which is the one we added Sunday. I don't want to jinx it, but he normally goes outside the box at least once a day. His stool is also looking a lot better - previously it had been well-formed but very wet (which wasn't fun cleaning up when he'd go outside the box). Fingers crossed that this is the beginning of him turning over a new leaf.

 

[adequately]

Also, I posted in the introductions section over here to more formally introduce ourselves! Thanks everyone for all your help with decoding the behavior of Fred (Cat 1) and George (Cat 2)!

 

[adequately]

Spoke too soon... just found some turds in between all the boxes we have in the spare room. Just dead center of the floor.

Oh well. I guess we will keep working with him. I did purchase some of the feliway (the multicat diffuser and the spray) that should be here tomorrow. Maybe that will help?

 

[jen]

Is it a pile of turds or just one? We have a fat cat and she gets one just hanging there sometimes when she jumps out of the box and it then falls off in various other places...

 

[adequately]

Three little nuggets. Not as much as will usually be there when he goes, but there wasn't anything new in any of the boxes. And they had a toy draped over top of them lol

 

[jen]

Could it be that one of them is constipated and is struggling to go in the box and then leaves it and suddenly has to go later? I don't know, just thinking...

You have 2-3 litterboxes available to them right?

 

[Mamanyt1953]

I'm also seeing lots of users in other threads offhandedly mentioning how horrific male play can sound, and that makes me feel better.

It can sound like murder and mayhem! My rule of thumb is, if there is no blood on the floor or fur in the air, there is no fight, just rowdy play or heated discussions.

We've had some disagreements with our current vet and have been looking for a new one.

If you would like to find a feline specialist, and you are in the USA, this site has a search engine by zip code. Be sure to select the "Feline ONLY" option.

https://catvets.com/

Also, these articles may help in your search:

How To Choose The Best Veterinarian For My Cat?
Cat Vet Checkup - What To Expect
How To Talk To Your Vet

 

[adequately]

Could it be that one of them is constipated and is struggling to go in the box and then leaves it and suddenly has to go later? I don't know, just thinking...

You have 2-3 litterboxes available to them right?

We actually have 6 boxes - if you look further up, I posted a map. I don't think it's constipation, as I've watched him come into the spare room and squat down and go. No attempt at the box at all.

If you would like to find a feline specialist, and you are in the USA, this site has a search engine by zip code. Be sure to select the "Feline ONLY" option.

https://catvets.com/

Also, these articles may help in your search:

How To Choose The Best Veterinarian For My Cat?
Cat Vet Checkup - What To Expect
How To Talk To Your Vet

Thanks for these resources! I'll take a look.