3 grumpy cats

[LgAley922]

Hello, I have 3 cats that we adopted all together. They all came from the same home, two are a bonded pair and one is not. Previous owner had 7 cats, 2 moms and the rest were their kittens. They were all in the same room at the shelter, with their two other "siblings." First few days went great, they all got along, they stayed in the same room while we got to know each other. No fighting really, maybe a spat here and there but nothing out of the ordinary. Then one day everything changed and we aren't sure what caused it. The bonded pair don't like the 3rd cat. They chase her and they hiss at each other. They won't allow her to be upstairs and barely downstairs. She only allowed, on their terms, to be in our back window. Obviously that's no life for a cat. We are in the process of reintroducing them and my singled out cat is not liking being confined, the other two can be a tad destructive so we don't keep them locked up for long. But today the singleton got out and so we tested to see how it would go. It didn't go well, the two chased the third and the third was hissing and growling when they got near. We aren't sure what to do. They've never not lived together. They only know each other and now they act like they hate each other. Some moments we can get them to chill and be in the same room but then all of a sudden it's wrestlemania. We are keeping them separated again and trying the reintroductions again. But I'm just not sure what to do. We have 4 litter boxes, 2 upstairs and 2 downstairs. 2 water fountains one on each floor, 3 bowls of food, 3 cat trees and 1 tall cat bed, one in each room. Lots of scratchers and two floors for them all to be in. I just want them to live in peace, I don't need them to all be besties but I can't stand seeing my singleton be bullied anymore.

 

[Alldara]

Hi! While you are reintroducing them, try brushing them daily with the same brush and taking some dry clothes and rubbing it along each of them and then along the baseboards of your home.

When you lock up the duo, if you feed dry food, let that be the time they get it and put it in a puzzle feeder (there's loads of DIY ones you can make from cardboard on YouTube.) Eating first, should give them less time to be destructive. Plus it'll be a reward for being "locked up".

 

[Kris107]

Have you had a vet look at the "odd man out" cat? Sometimes cats can sense illness in a cat. Do you reward them when they're together? Feed them on opposites sides of a baby gate, etc?

 

[FeebysOwner]

Hi, besides the vet check which is a good idea, let me confirm they are all spayed/neutered (I presume they are). Other than that, it is possible that 'odd-lady-out' was associating more with some of the other cats in the previous home and not so much these two. It is also possible that these two were on their best behavior after coming into a new home. And, you can't forget that the chasing and all that follows is really 'play' to the other two (boys?), at least to start with.

I don't know how old any of them are, or how long you have had them, but I do know that site swapping so the lady can get time in other locations of the house is necessary. You need to find a way to give the other two a place where they can't be so destructive, as it is not fair to her to spend the majority of the time in a single room because of their behavior.

Can you get any tips to use from this TCS article?
How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction - TheCatSite

 

[LgAley922]

Have you had a vet look at the "odd man out" cat? Sometimes cats can sense illness in a cat. Do you reward them when they're together? Feed them on opposites sides of a baby gate, etc?

I have taken them to the vet when we first got them and when this all started. They didn't seem to find anything of note. But I will try and do a follow up if this doesn't improve. I do reward them. They all aren't big on treats or really food motivated. I've tried playing with them and petting them when they are together. But once their eyes are locked on my singleton they give chase. I try to distract them and it doesn't work for long. I have baby gates, my singleton won't stay behind it she just jumps it. So we are trying to put the duo behind the gate. It seems like food and litter boxes are an issue. They don't let her eat or use the litter box without chasing her but that isn't always the case. I've separated the litter boxes so she could use it and they guarded her and stalk her. I just started trying to play with them behind the baby gate and my singleton won't go near them. She just wants to be downstairs in our front window and chill and the other two just don't seem to want her to do that. If they get near our cat tree when she's there she hisses and growls because she's scared they'll attack her. They move around the cat tree like sharks until they pounce on her

 

[LgAley922]

Hi, besides the vet check which is a good idea, let me confirm they are all spayed/neutered (I presume they are). Other than that, it is possible that 'odd-lady-out' was associating more with some of the other cats in the previous home and not so much these two. It is also possible that these two were on their best behavior after coming into a new home. And, you can't forget that the chasing and all that follows is really 'play' to the other two (boys?), at least to start with.

I don't know how old any of them are, or how long you have had them, but I do know that site swapping so the lady can get time in other locations of the house is necessary. You need to find a way to give the other two a place where they can't be so destructive, as it is not fair to her to spend the majority of the time in a single room because of their behavior.

Can you get any tips to use from this TCS article?
How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction - TheCatSite

Yes they are all spayed. All three girls all three 2 years old and we got them at the end of June so not very long. Still plenty of time to get use to each other but it's just weird that they've always been together. I don't know too much about their situation at their previous home. But from what we observed the duo always were together. But the shelter had a webcam and I would watch them and all three would sleep in the same area, that's a big reason why we picked them because they seemed to be getting along. It was Nova (the singleton) and her two siblings and mom and then the duo and their mom. But Nova wasn't really that close with the other two, we didn't observe a bond with any of them. But we didn't see a lot of fighting at the shelter, but of course we weren't there that much. Sometimes I wonder if one of the duo is playing and Nova is just loud or doesn't like her playing, but the other duo chases her she doesn't seem to be playing. But now it's every time the see her they chase and just stare at her. Nova is a tuxedo so she's very vocal so maybe they don't like that? But we have been able to put the duo in our room with the gate without destruction so far and we are swapping them out.

 

[FeebysOwner]

It's time for 'training' those two cats. That requires picking them up, when they are stalking her or have already started the chase, saying a firm no (or a hiss, just pick one) and a time out for 1-2 minutes. Over and over and over and over again, until they 'get it'. It is a lot of hard work, but better than letting them continue to make your singleton miserable. Sadly, many people don't have the wherewithal to hang in there with the consistency and patience it takes to be successful, but if they do it usually will work. This not only helps to stop the bad behavior, but gives confidence the 'abused' one by knowing she can rely on you to 'have her back'.

She also needs time to be at the window she enjoys without them bothering her, or anywhere else for that matter - at least part of the time.

When you are not home to monitor them, then they need to be separated so they can't get to her.

Even if they are young, there is no guarantee they will grow out of the habit if it is allowed to go on and on and on.

Some folks will say that 3 females will make for a disastrous 'family' - maybe that is so, but I tend to think that in the big scheme of males can be just as bad. It has more to do with the personalities, regardless of gender, IMO.

 

[LgAley922]

It's time for 'training' those two cats. That requires picking them up, when they are stalking her or have already started the chase, saying a firm no (or a hiss, just pick one) and a time out for 1-2 minutes. Over and over and over and over again, until they 'get it'. It is a lot of hard work, but better than letting them continue to make your singleton miserable. Sadly, many people don't have the wherewithal to hang in there with the consistency and patience it takes to be successful, but if they do it usually will work. This not only helps to stop the bad behavior, but gives confidence the 'abused' one by knowing she can rely on you to 'have her back'.

She also needs time to be at the window she enjoys without them bothering her, or anywhere else for that matter - at least part of the time.

When you are not home to monitor them, then they need to be separated so they can't get to her.

Even if they are young, there is no guarantee they will grow out of the habit if it is allowed to go on and on and on.

Some folks will say that 3 females will make for a disastrous 'family' - maybe that is so, but I tend to think that in the big scheme of males can be just as bad. It has more to do with the personalities, regardless of gender, IMO.

Do you still suggest continuing with the reintroduction? Or stop that and let them be together and start the "training"

 

[FeebysOwner]

I didn't get the impression that much of any level/degree of introductions were still going on. From what you said, she is in the position of having to use the same litter box(es) and apparently eats nearby them to the point they can chase her.

I guess you went back to introducing them, since you said that you are now swapping them in between areas. But, that has to include litter boxes and food/water as well.

No, if you want to try stepping back and proceeding with re-introductions, that is fine. You can always utilize other options for a gate/blockade that she can't jump over, so she and they both have to spend some time in each other's spaces, of course at first by themselves.

 

[LgAley922]

I didn't get the impression that much of any level/degree of introductions were still going on. From what you said, she is in the position of having to use the same litter box(es) and apparently eats nearby them to the point they can chase her.

I guess you went back to introducing them, since you said that you are now swapping them in between areas. But, that has to include litter boxes and food/water as well.

No, if you want to try stepping back and proceeding with re-introductions, that is fine. You can always utilize other options for a gate/blockade that she can't jump over, so she and they both have to spend some time in each other's spaces, of course at first by themselves.

The chasing and not letting her eat or use the litter boxes was before we started reintroducing. This was part of the issues. But the other day Nova got out of her room, with her own litter box and food bowl, and so we tried for like an hour to see if they could be together again and it didn't go well. So we went back to separate rooms. But now we are having the duo in one room and then Nova in her room and we swap who gets to be out in the house and who is in their room. This as been like a day or two of this new system.

I've looked into getting a screen door but I'm not sure what that would look like or a taller gate

 

[FeebysOwner]

Yeah, I'd go with the re-introductions and see what happens. Ever consider a fairly simple DIY job, if you don't want to install a screen door? This (see pic) is made of home improvement shelving set on their 'ends' and connected with zip ties to make a folding door. That allows you to fold back part to easily get in and out of the room. It can be secured with Command Strips and rope on each side of the door.

 

[Kris107]

Sometimes I do think it's about setting down consistent rules for the 2 chasers. But make sure the solo one isn't slyly provoking too. Sometimes you have to out stubborn cats and be firm.

 

[maggie101]

Sorta opposite here. My cats like to be near me but 2 of my cats do not like maggie. Maggie's territorial, she wants to sleep by me but my other 2 cats are in her spot,and she tries to play with them when they don't want. Plus Maggie is bigger(tall and long) and that makes my one of my cats afraid of her. Peaches does what she wants only. She will pla with Maggie on her terms. Besides allowing each cat to have a bed, I have clicker trained Maggie so she won't pester peaches. If your cats are 1year plus thier personality will change

 

[LgAley922]

Sorta opposite here. My cats like to be near me but 2 of my cats do not like maggie. Maggie's territorial, she wants to sleep by me but my other 2 cats are in her spot,and she tries to play with them when they don't want. Plus Maggie is bigger(tall and long) and that makes my one of my cats afraid of her. Peaches does what she wants only. She will pla with Maggie on her terms. Besides allowing each cat to have a bed, I have clicker trained Maggie so she won't pester peaches. If your cats are 1year plus thier personality will change

Oh I didn’t think of clicker training. How long did you work on that with your Maggie?

 

[LgAley922]

It's time for 'training' those two cats. That requires picking them up, when they are stalking her or have already started the chase, saying a firm no (or a hiss, just pick one) and a time out for 1-2 minutes. Over and over and over and over again, until they 'get it'. It is a lot of hard work, but better than letting them continue to make your singleton miserable. Sadly, many people don't have the wherewithal to hang in there with the consistency and patience it takes to be successful, but if they do it usually will work. This not only helps to stop the bad behavior, but gives confidence the 'abused' one by knowing she can rely on you to 'have her back'.

She also needs time to be at the window she enjoys without them bothering her, or anywhere else for that matter - at least part of the time.

When you are not home to monitor them, then they need to be separated so they can't get to her.

Even if they are young, there is no guarantee they will grow out of the habit if it is allowed to go on and on and on.

Some folks will say that 3 females will make for a disastrous 'family' - maybe that is so, but I tend to think that in the big scheme of males can be just as bad. It has more to do with the personalities, regardless of gender, IMO.

Sorry another follow up question. May seem silly but could the “discipline” cause the duo to attack her more? Like could it make them have a negative association with her and make them go after her? Just something that crossed my mind

 

[FeebysOwner]

Sorry another follow up question. May seem silly but could the “discipline” cause the duo to attack her more? Like could it make them have a negative association with her and make them go after her? Just something that crossed my mind

I kind of feel like that is more of human trait than one of an animal. So, what do you think happens when a cat, unlike yours, stands up for themselves and 'disciplines' another cat for misbehavior? Do you think that too causes a resentment and that the disciplined cats are going to attack more because of it? It doesn't seem to work that way, the 'attacking' cats learn their boundaries with the 'attackee' and stop the behavior. When this happens, does anyone worry that the disciplined cats hate the other one? No, they are just happy that the cats eventually learn to co-exist. You are merely assuming that 'disciplinary' role on behalf of your cat that can't do this with the others.

Besides, I thought for now, you were going back to introductions. If that works, you won't have to worry about it.

 

[maggie101]

Oh I didn’t think of clicker training. How long did you work on that with your Maggie?

It only took a few minutes to get her to come when called. I got lucky. Not all cats wil learn that fast though it wasa simple one. I don't need the clicker anymore

 

[Alldara]

Magnus learned come super quickly with clicker training. Learned sit so fast too and twirl but then never decided to focus long enough to learn anything else.

Calcifer did well too. But training Ghost, he wants to learn it but doesn't quite get the concept.