1 yr old cat meeting16 yr old cat

89Mo

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Today I'm bringing my 1.5 year old neutered male cat to meet my mum's 16.5 year old neutered male cat.

I'm staying the easter long weekend (3 nights)

The introduction is based on the idea of my brother & his girlfriend renting my house so they can live alone (they're currently renting a room at my mum's)
And my cat and I in the near future will move in with my mum so I can save for a deposit for a bigger house.

My question is about introductions.
As we only have 3 days we are just going to let my cat explore the house for a bit, then bring my mum's cat inside, and basically see what happens.

My concern is it's going to be too much too soon. As I know cats are supposed to be introduced gradually.

But the move will be dependent upon how the meeting goes today.

Mum's cat is very elderly with arthritis, and my cat has never seen another cat since i adopted him at 8 weeks, and has a skittish temperament.

We obviously don't plan on leaving them alone. Is this an accident waiting to happen?
 

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89Mo

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Also the above pics weren't taken in the same house we just have the same flooring haha
 

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...My concern is it's going to be too much too soon. As I know cats are supposed to be introduced gradually.

But the move will be dependent upon how the meeting goes today.

Mum's cat is very elderly with arthritis, and my cat has never seen another cat since i adopted him at 8 weeks, and has a skittish temperament.

We obviously don't plan on leaving them alone. Is this an accident waiting to happen?
Ahhh...my honest answer would be that 3 days are just not long enough.... to see how two cats will act around each other.
But, there have been times, when one cat...absolutely does not mind another cat.
(usually these cats have been around other cats, though.)

It's just hard, since your cat is 1.5 yrs old and your mum's is a senior at 16.5 yrs.

Why do you have to 'base everything on how well the 3 days go'?🤔
Doing 'long and gradual introductions'...may seem like a lot of work...but really...you just put a Plan in place...and stick with the 'stages of introductions'.
It's not like there is any real pressure...to make the cats like each other...right away?

Are you thinking that both cats will never like each other?
That would be very hard to predict in 3 days.
Since it usually takes a 'new cat' about a week...to just get used to the 'new surroundings'...and 'feel less Fear'

Here's a Cat Site Article for gradual cat to cat intros.
How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles
and Jackson Galaxy has some really good videos on youtube, as well.

(Both cats are beautiful, by the way.:)
What are their names?)
 
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89Mo

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Ahhh...my honest answer would be that 3 days are just not long enough.... to see how two cats will act around each other.
But, there have been times, when one cat...absolutely does not mind another cat.
(usually these cats have been around other cats, though.)

It's just hard, since your cat is 1.5 yrs old and your mum's is a senior at 16.5 yrs.

Why do you have to 'base everything on how well the 3 days go'?🤔
Doing 'long and gradual introductions'...may seem like a lot of work...but really...you just put a Plan in place...and stick with the 'stages of introductions'.
It's not like there is any real pressure...to make the cats like each other...right away?

Are you thinking that both cats will never like each other?
That would be very hard to predict in 3 days.
Since it usually takes a 'new cat' about a week...to just get used to the 'new surroundings'...and 'feel less Fear'

Here's a Cat Site Article for gradual cat to cat intros.
How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles
and Jackson Galaxy has some really good videos on youtube, as well.

(Both cats are beautiful, by the way.:)
What are their names?)
Sorry I meant this is an initial meeting. We plan more weekend catchups in the next few months.

My tuxedo is Benny
Mum's cat is Simba, he looks like a teddy bear he had the tips of his ears amputated a few years back due to skin cancer which he also has on his nose.
 
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89Mo

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Oh, also...is your cat 'harness trained'...by any chance?
Has he ever walked in a 'harness'...before?
(Indoors, I mean,...not necessarily outdoors.)
No he isn't he fights me just to put his collar on 🤣 he's still in his nipping phase too
 

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Sorry I meant this is an initial meeting. We plan more weekend catchups in the next few months.

My tuxedo is Benny
Mum's cat is Simba, he looks like a teddy bear he had the tips of his ears amputated a few years back due to skin cancer which he also has on his nose.
Both cats are very cute.
Ahh..I hope that Simba is doing well.
(I just thought that maybe his ears got frostbite, and had to be amputated,...so really hope that his skin cancer is in remission or controlled by meds/ prednisolone, etc.)

***I would keep your Benny in his cat carrier, then, when initially meeting Simba.
And then watch Simba's reactions.

Afterwards, you could let your Benny explore the home,...on his own...but have Simba in another room.
This way your Benny can get his Scent all over the home.
And then Simba may come to accept him faster.

Also, if your Benny is the Fearful one...just slowly introduce..."Scented items"...from Simba...such as cat beds, cat blanket, even t-shirt or socks...that you rubbed/wiped Simba...all over with...and place these items in Benny's room.
This way...your Benny gets 'introduced to the Scent' of Simba...first...and his 'fear response' of another cast lessens.

Do the same with 'Scent soaked' items from Benny...fabric items that you wiped/rubbed all over Benny with...and leave them by Simba's food dish...or near him...so that he gets to know Benny through Scent.
 
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Both cats are very cute.
Ahh..I hope that Simba is doing well.
(I just thought that maybe his ears got frostbite, and had to be amputated,...so really hope that his skin cancer is in remission or controlled by meds/ prednisolone, etc.)

***I would keep your Benny in his cat carrier, then, when initially meeting Simba.
And then watch Simba's reactions.

Afterwards, you could let your Benny explore the home,...on his own...but have Simba in another room.
This way your Benny can get his Scent all over the home.
And then Simba may come to accept him faster.

Also, if your Benny is the Fearful one...just slowly introduce..."Scented items"...from Simba...such as cat beds, cat blanket, even t-shirt or socks...that you rubbed/wiped Simba...all over with...and place these items in Benny's room.
This way...your Benny gets 'introduced to the Scent' of Simba...first...and his 'fear response' of another cast lessens.

Do the same with 'Scent soaked' items from Benny...fabric items that you wiped/rubbed all over Benny with...and leave them by Simba's food dish...or near him...so that he gets to know Benny through Scent.
Thank you for your suggestions. Very helpful and kind.I will be sure to do this.

Benny and his litter mates were rescued from the streets at 3 weeks, they caught the mother a few days later, but apparently weren't reunited, so he's a bit of a sook and still suckles on his bed. Bless him.

We live in Western Australia so it doesn't get cold enough for frost or snow, although I wish it did! I hate the heat

Have a Happy Easter 🐣
 

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My opinion is that there really isn't any point to starting until you move in -- just unnecessary stress that won't accomplish anything. The odds that you'll make any progress are pretty close to zero, and you won't be able to tell much either. It would be super common for the 16 y.o. to be growly and stressed, and to absolutely freak if the 1 y.o. was allowed close. It takes time to get past that.

About the only thing you can find out is that the 16 y.o. does not have a much more severe reaction than normal. Like if he wont use the litterbox for the 3 days or gives himself a hot spot or something. Super rare, but it does happen. But beyond learning that you don't have that kind of really extreme reaction, you'll get growling, hissing and routine stress, and it will tell you little or nothing. Thats just how these go. 16 y.o. plus 1 y.o. is normally a very difficult introduction with a very small chance of going smoothly. Normally, it takes a lot of time, and your working towards toleration not friendship.

If you have an escape, you could even make things worse. And its not that easy to keep a super eager 1 year old contained.
 

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My opinion is that there really isn't any point to starting until you move in -- just unnecessary stress that won't accomplish anything. The odds that you'll make any progress are pretty close to zero, and you won't be able to tell much either. It would be super common for the 16 y.o. to be growly and stressed, and to absolutely freak if the 1 y.o. was allowed close. It takes time to get past that.

About the only thing you can find out is that the 16 y.o. does not have a much more severe reaction than normal. Like if he wont use the litterbox for the 3 days or gives himself a hot spot or something. Super rare, but it does happen. But beyond learning that you don't have that kind of really extreme reaction, you'll get growling, hissing and routine stress, and it will tell you little or nothing. Thats just how these go. 16 y.o. plus 1 y.o. is normally a very difficult introduction with a very small chance of going smoothly. Normally, it takes a lot of time, and your working towards toleration not friendship.

If you have an escape, you could even make things worse. And its not that easy to keep a super eager 1 year old contained.
That's all valid points A ArtNJ ...but what if you had to go visit family for the Easter long weekend...or whatever long weekend there is? :bunny:
I think it's much better to take your cat along.:)

He's young, and will hopefully learn to 'adjust to some short trips'.
Most cats do not like traveling or leaving their 'safe known territory'...but hey, since he is young...he might be able to adjust quicker.

You're right about the 'escape' though...that might go really, really bad...really quick.

Never know about elderly cats, though.
Some just don't care about the young ones...as long as they are not bothered by them at all.
Spare room for elderly cat, who probably sleeps mostly, would be okay for 3 days.
Better than getting a 'cat sitter'...for the younger cat, in any case, anyhow.
 
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Thank you for your suggestions. Very helpful and kind.I will be sure to do this.

Benny and his litter mates were rescued from the streets at 3 weeks, they caught the mother a few days later, but apparently weren't reunited, so he's a bit of a sook and still suckles on his bed. Bless him.
:blush:..I had to look up the meaning of "sook"...:lol:
"noun. Australia and New Zealand. a timid, cowardly person, especially a young person; crybaby."

That's hilarious. I just love those Australian expressions.
I'm sure I would have absolutely no idea,..what anyone was talking about down there,.. but it's great to learn things..

Ahh, Benny does sound like he 'self soothes, because he was separated from his mom, so young. :) :cloud9:
And yes, Bless him...except when he is in his 'nipping phase'...then I would choose 'other words'...:lol: :wink:

I guess you just need to use a lot of 'wand toys' and not use your hands around him, while playing, to prevent getting bites.
Also, he probably would like those 'battery operated cat toys'...to occupy his time.
Ping pong balls, scrunched up paper, wand toys similar to 'da bird', etc.

We live in Western Australia so it doesn't get cold enough for frost or snow, although I wish it did! I hate the heat

Have a Happy Easter 🐣
I hate the cold...hahaha. :lol:

I wish I lived down in Australia...somewhere near the ocean, though,...but hey, anywhere...where no snow falls, sounds nice to me.:biggrin:
(as a kid, snow was pretty. As an adult...and having to shovel it, from november to march, ...I came to hate it.
(sometimes it would snow in april, too,...just in time for Easter. yikes.)

Thank you,...and hoping that you and yours...all have a Happy Easter, too. :wave3: :bunny:🍰🥮☕
 

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I hear you cat nap cat nap and certainly bringing the cat but not actively trying introductiony stuff is one possibility. I'm just saying: (1) I don't think there is much to be gained by introductiony stuff, beyond quickly taking the general temperature by a bit of scent swapping; and (2) most cats dont travel well, so there might even be some stress that the 1 year old needs to get over, and a long weekend is not a lot of time to do that. So its potentially a lot of stress on both sides with not much accomplished. Maybe there is some benefit to taking the general temperature -- if in the unlikely event things seem much worse than average, there could some adjustment of plans? Thats about the only real value I see.

Certainly your totally right that you never know, and getting lucky is very possible. Just saying that 3 days is not enough time to make progress absent crazy good luck, so its a temperature check, which may not be worth it.
 

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I hear you cat nap cat nap and certainly bringing the cat but not actively trying introductiony stuff is one possibility. I'm just saying: (1) I don't think there is much to be gained by introductiony stuff, beyond quickly taking the general temperature by a bit of scent swapping; and (2) most cats dont travel well, so there might even be some stress that the 1 year old needs to get over, and a long weekend is not a lot of time to do that. So its potentially a lot of stress on both sides with not much accomplished. Maybe there is some benefit to taking the general temperature -- if in the unlikely event things seem much worse than average, there could some adjustment of plans? Thats about the only real value I see.
Yeah, you're entirely right A ArtNJ .
I like the way you use the phrase,..."taking the general temperature"...of the situation. :thumbsup:
It definitely would do that, for sure.

Also, really good to have some 'adjustment plans', too. :)
Certainly your totally right that you never know, and getting lucky is very possible. Just saying that 3 days is not enough time to make progress absent crazy good luck, so its a temperature check, which may not be worth it.
"absent crazy good luck"...That is exactly what is needed here. :lol:
But yeah, that would kind of be like 'winning the lotto' or something.
Ah well,.. I look at it like an Adventure...though probably not an 'all smooth sailing one'.

Have a great holiday weekend, too, ArtNJ. :wave3:
Not sure if it is one where you are, but if not, there's still a relaxing weekend in there, hopefully.:cloud9: 🌱🥧
 

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Today I'm bringing my 1.5 year old neutered male cat to meet my mum's 16.5 year old neutered male cat.

I'm staying the easter long weekend (3 nights)

The introduction is based on the idea of my brother & his girlfriend renting my house so they can live alone (they're currently renting a room at my mum's)
And my cat and I in the near future will move in with my mum so I can save for a deposit for a bigger house.

My question is about introductions.
As we only have 3 days we are just going to let my cat explore the house for a bit, then bring my mum's cat inside, and basically see what happens.

My concern is it's going to be too much too soon. As I know cats are supposed to be introduced gradually.

But the move will be dependent upon how the meeting goes today.

Mum's cat is very elderly with arthritis, and my cat has never seen another cat since i adopted him at 8 weeks, and has a skittish temperament.

We obviously don't plan on leaving them alone. Is this an accident waiting to happen?

I just wanted to chime in to agree with ArtNJ. I'm afraid that it could discourage you into thinking it won't work out if you get a strong negative reaction. I would never let them see each other or be out in the same room so soon even with supervision. When I got my now two-year-old girl tabby she was 10 weeks old. I had two older cats, a 9-year-old male and 10-year-old female. They hissed and growled and rejected her even though she was just a tiny kitten. I kept them completely separated most of the time and only allowed short visuals. It took 2-3 weeks to start feeding on opposite sides of a gate and over a month to be out in the open together. If I had allowed those first times together and/or those first 2-3 weeks to be the deciding factor in whether it would work or not, I wouldn't have her today, which would be awful because she is a delight and all three get along so well. In fact, after about two months, she would totally snuggle into the long hair fur of the 10-year-old female and they were completely relaxed together. She's a bit older now and they snuggle like that, but all three are good friends after a very negative beginning (which is not uncommon).

I would also be concerned that it might possibly sabotage things a little if they are stressed from meeting each other for a few days and then things go back to normal and then that cycle repeats. It seems like that maybe could backfire, but I've never tried it that way so I don't know.

They both look like real sweethearts and I do hope that it works out and they end up accepting each other in the long run.
 
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89Mo

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UPDATE

well the visit was largely a success I would say. My young cat was a bit afraid and weary to begin with. The old cat wasn't phased much and showed no aggression towards benny.

They both took up the sun in my mother's room sometimes within close proximity. A few times my young cat got a bit hissy. Nothing major. The second day the older cat chased the younger one for an few seconds.

And my young cat got his first taste of the great outdoors, he dug under the fence and I found him at 11pm at night wandering close by.
So we blocked it off using bricks, but he managed to wander again at 4am this morning. Luckily my mother lives in a quiet area so he was pretty safe.

So now just up to my brother and his girlfriend if they're seriously ready to move out together or not, then they'll rent my house and I'll rent the room at my mother's.
 

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UPDATE

well the visit was largely a success I would say. My young cat was a bit afraid and weary to begin with. The old cat wasn't phased much and showed no aggression towards benny.

They both took up the sun in my mother's room
sometimes within close proximity. A few times my young cat got a bit hissy. Nothing major. The second day the older cat chased the younger one for an few seconds.
Fantastic. :yess:
Way to go Simba...for still chasing the younger one, and showing him...how it's done.
So glad that your Benny showed respect for the elder Simba.

Thanks for posting the photos, too. :)
I wouldn't believe they managed to get so close...unless I saw it with my own eyes. :loveeyes:

Benny looks to be trying to stretch, stretch, stretch,...so that he could 'sniff Simba' some more. :lol:
I'm kind of glad that Simba didn't quickly turn around and swat Benny...for being so bold.
That 'underbed photo' is great. :thumbsup:

(The second photo, reminds me of one of our previous cats...who liked to get up on my sister's dressers...and slowly 'knock down' all her small 'angel figurines'. lol. :blackcat::gingercat::bluepaw:
Well, she and I both love cats, so basically our cat was saying..."put those figurines away". :catrub:)

A member, here, said that you can use 'museum putty'...to keep things in place.
I don't know what that is, or where you can buy it.

I just basically think, that you will have to go around the home, rooms, etc....and "Benny-proof"...anything that you think might get damaged by a cat who both needs to 'jump to get out of the way of Simba'...and who is also very young, and therefore needs places to climb up on, or sleep on, etc.
(especially if your Mum has many valuable or breakable things)

Hopefully, when you move in, your mum would let you put up some 'cat shelves'...or get some boxes, to leave in corners, or chairs, side tables, and other 'vertical places'...that will allow Benny or even Simba to relax and sleep in.

Your Benny looks so adorable in that second photo. :cloud9:
Like he's thinking, "Hmm, I like the look of that bed,...but I think I'm much safer here, on this dresser,...since I don't want to upset that guy cat, who owns the bed". :bluepaw:
And my young cat got his first taste of the great outdoors, he dug under the fence and I found him at 11pm at night wandering close by.
So we blocked it off using bricks, but he managed to wander again at 4am this morning. Luckily my mother lives in a quiet area so he was pretty safe.


So now just up to my brother and his girlfriend if they're seriously ready to move out together or not, then they'll rent my house and I'll rent the room at my mother's.
Good thinking blocking off with those bricks.
You might have to re-think the 'harness training' ..for your Benny...if he always wants to wander off.
Or if you save enough money, then some members here, have used outdoor cat tents, or small catios, either the bought ones, or DIY kinds, that you can build yourself, using wood, and chicken wire.
I think it's like you said, it all depends on the area and how safe it is.

As for your brother and his girlfriend, I would think that they would jump at the idea of total privacy.
But if you come back and say that your mum does all the cooking and laundry for your brother...then he may need a little gentle push...to make the leap...into cooking, cleaning, washing dishes, and doing laundry. :vibes::hide: :jawdrop: :rolleyes2:

I think it should be a 50/50 thing between men and women to do these things...but often I've found that the guys...will either purposely not wash the dishes properly, or cook very badly. (don't tell your brother I said that. lol. It might just be the 'boys'...and not 'men'...that my family knows. We call them 'mama's boys'....where the mum does everything for them.)
Wishing you and yours all the Best. :goodluck:
 
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Yes I am pretty pleased. We might even try for another 3 day visit soon.
Benny found his own spots to rest
Yes Benny was obsessed with knocking down the fish food and playing with the container.

We did have to put blankets on her imitation leather couch he made a few pin holes in it, not scratching on it but got a bit over excited and leapt all over it. She has the feet on her couch so was trying to get a dust bunny underneath.
I have the same one at home but never bothered to put the feet on so no gap underneath I think that's why he hasn't damaged my couch.
But she just said anything ruined or broken I replace, which is fair.

My mother says she doesn't want it to look like a cat house so obviously I would respect that.
I'll just put his things in my future room
We may need to put in a cat door as Benny is used to going in and out at night into the back garden, but my fences have paving all around so he can't dig and can't jump high enough to get over (they're iron) so no grip either.

Well at the moment my brother and girlfriend just pay for their two rooms and the internet, so the biggest shock will be all the utilities and living like adults with cooking cleaning (neither are very good at these tasks) lol. My brother is extra keen as it's 5 mins from his work.

But it would be nice for Benny to explore the 'real world' as he has lived the sheltered life at my house because I refuse to let him out the front door because I want him to be able to get back home independently.

Anyway the ball is in my brother and girlfriend's court. My mother is more than happy for the new arrangement, especially as I have lived by myself the last 8 years and am domesticated haha.
 

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Today I'm bringing my 1.5 year old neutered male cat to meet my mum's 16.5 year old neutered male cat.

I'm staying the easter long weekend (3 nights)

The introduction is based on the idea of my brother & his girlfriend renting my house so they can live alone (they're currently renting a room at my mum's)
And my cat and I in the near future will move in with my mum so I can save for a deposit for a bigger house.

My question is about introductions.
As we only have 3 days we are just going to let my cat explore the house for a bit, then bring my mum's cat inside, and basically see what happens.

My concern is it's going to be too much too soon. As I know cats are supposed to be introduced gradually.

But the move will be dependent upon how the meeting goes today.

Mum's cat is very elderly with arthritis, and my cat has never seen another cat since i adopted him at 8 weeks, and has a skittish temperament.

We obviously don't plan on leaving them alone. Is this an accident waiting to happen?
Yes! Don't do it. Cats do indeed need to be gradually introduced. If you're only going to be there 3 days, I suggest that you don't bother with getting the cats together at all. Three days isn't enough time for an introduction done rightly.

My cat Boaz was kept solitary for 2 months (BAD idea) before we suddenly put him together with our 2 new kittens and to this day our cats have problems getting along with each other.
 

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Yes I am pretty pleased. We might even try for another 3 day visit soon.
Benny found his own spots to rest
Yes Benny was obsessed with knocking down the fish food and playing with the container.

We did have to put blankets on her imitation leather couch he made a few pin holes in it, not scratching on it but got a bit over excited and leapt all over it. She has the feet on her couch so was trying to get a dust bunny underneath.
I have the same one at home but never bothered to put the feet on so no gap underneath I think that's why he hasn't damaged my couch.
But she just said anything ruined or broken I replace, which is fair.

My mother says she doesn't want it to look like a cat house so obviously I would respect that.
I'll just put his things in my future room
We may need to put in a cat door as Benny is used to going in and out at night into the back garden, but my fences have paving all around so he can't dig and can't jump high enough to get over (they're iron) so no grip either.

Well at the moment my brother and girlfriend just pay for their two rooms and the internet, so the biggest shock will be all the utilities and living like adults with cooking cleaning (neither are very good at these tasks) lol. My brother is extra keen as it's 5 mins from his work.

But it would be nice for Benny to explore the 'real world' as he has lived the sheltered life at my house because I refuse to let him out the front door because I want him to be able to get back home independently.

Anyway the ball is in my brother and girlfriend's court. My mother is more than happy for the new arrangement, especially as I have lived by myself the last 8 years and am domesticated haha.
I just read your update. Well, it's your decision to make. I'll just forewarn you that this is not how cat introductions should be done. When we put our two new kittens together with my kitten without any proper gradual introduction, all SEEMED to go well in the beginning, but the animosity grew and grew. These kittens had invaded my kitten's territory and he was suddenly expected to just deal with it.

Being immediately put together with a strange cat in an unfamiliar environment is also asking for trouble because getting moved from the home turf is stressful to a cat.

I respect that it's your decision to make. I just feel led to warn you based off of my experience with our cats. Our wonderful Creator humbled me, educated me, and took me on the journey of a lifetime when my family and I became a multi-cat household!
 
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Yes! Don't do it. Cats do indeed need to be gradually introduced. If you're only going to be there 3 days, I suggest that you don't bother with getting the cats together at all. Three days isn't enough time for an introduction done rightly.

My cat Boaz was kept solitary for 2 months (BAD idea) before we suddenly put him together with our 2 new kittens and to this day our cats have problems getting along with each other.
Hi please read my update. all went well :)
 
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