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  1. cbowdidge

    Resident Cat & New Kitten Issued

    It definitely varies from cat to cat. When my sister moved back home and brought her cat, Sotches with her, we didn't introduce him to my cat, Merlin, properly. However, they became best friends within a week, but that is by all accounts, the exception rather than the rule. Back in March, after...
  2. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    What's really interesting is looking t the dynamic between Merlin and Martini and comparing it to Sotches and Merlin. With Sotches, the two of them often jockeyed for dominance. Sotches was the dominant cat and MErlin would try to challenge him (unsuccessfully), however, with Merlin and Martini...
  3. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    Merlin and Martini are BFFS now, and today I saw the ultimate proof. Merlin and Martini were sharing food from the same bowl, Merlin and Sotchy did the same.  We just got a puppy, and the cats don't seem all that upset. Just find him about hyper. Merlin is a bit more cautious but hasn't raised...
  4. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    To echo what everyone's advice on here is to me: Give it time. It can take cats up to a year. It can be frustrating and confusing. Merlin has adjusted now, they've touched noses, sat together, any chasing is mostly in play and not aggression anymore and Merlin will often trill as if to say "Hi"...
  5. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    Good news to report: Merlin seems to have accepted Martini, he's even gone up to him and touched noses and sniffed him a few times. He doesn't mind him being around the living room, there was one incident last weekend when he jumped on Martini but that's more being wound up that's the only time...
  6. cbowdidge

    How do you accept?

    Awww, sounds like a wonderful dream. In time you will heal and remember Cocoa and smile.
  7. cbowdidge

    Scratching the furniture

    He has been using the post more. He doesn't scratch the furniture that much. And he uses the door mat, probably because he sees Merlin doing it so he knows it's OK @Draco  Correction, it's Martini who scratches the furniture, not Merlin. Merlin has never scratched the furniture
  8. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    It's very reassuring. On reflection, Merlin could have been a lot nastier than just chasing and three/four months isn't that long, we just got spoiled with Sotches and Merlin being friends within a week, and set the bar way too high. Merlin now seems to be more comfortable. The occasional...
  9. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    So, some very encouraging news to report: Merlin has been pretty good, he hasn't chased Martini out of the living room nearly as much (if he does it's more because it's the the morning and he's wound up), he is much more relaxed even sitting next to him, and just now they were nose to nose, both...
  10. cbowdidge

    Scratching the furniture

    Thanks, everyone. He has been using the post. Sometimes he goes behind the chair where we can't reach him.
  11. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    I get that, and that's how it goes. They aren't fighting, Merlin isn't attacking. It can be a bit baffling at times, but overall, it could be going worse. I re-enforce the positive steps, and I try to think about it from Merlin's perspective, losing his best friend so suddenly and having to...
  12. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    And yesterday and today he was back to being territorial again. They're not fighting at least. This how it will go until he adjusts, it just can get confusing when he makes progress then stalls again. We got spoiled with Merlin and Sotches and I fell that now it's backfiring at times,  since...
  13. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    So I have some very good news to report: Over this past week, the interactions have mostly been peaceful. Merlin has seen Martini in the living room, and lied down on the floor and didn't chase him out. So we gave him lots of positive enforcement. Then last night, Merlin saw Martini up on my bed...
  14. cbowdidge

    Scratching the furniture

    Thanks. Martini has used the scratching post but still at times scratches the furniture. My sister said she is going to put double-sided tape on the couch as a deterrent. As I said, Merlin has never scratched the furniture even as a kitten, we encouraged him to use the mat. Martini doesn't go...
  15. cbowdidge

    Scratching the furniture

    My sister's cat, Martini, has started scratching the furniture. Nothing major but obviously, it's a habit we want to nip in the bud. We do have a small scratching, so hopefully he can use that. Are scratching posts effective?  What are some suggestions? This was never an issue with Merlin, when...
  16. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    Definitely a work in progress, like I said, snakes and ladders. However, there hasn't been any really serious fighting, Merlin hasn't really swiped or anything. We are all waiting for them to become friends, but I think it's a case of a watched kettle never boils. it will just happen one day...
  17. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    OK, to clarify the cats in this topic in case it gets confused. Merlin: My cat. He is six, a semi longhaired black cat Martini: My sister's cat. A one and a half year old Maine Coon Mix, she adopted him about three weeks ago. Sotches: My sister's cat who sadly crossed the rainbow bridge two...
  18. cbowdidge

    How do you accept?

    I think what Di and Bob said about taking away his pain is true and important. After my sister's cat was put to sleep, I googled some conditions and I'm guessing Sotches had saddle thrombus. Sotchy was dying and even if he did live, the odds of his recovering were very low and the odds of it...
  19. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    Yup, and again today, same thing. Definite progress. Merlin would hiss when Martini just approached at first. Just a tad unsure right now. Something my sister said is that we got spoiled because Sotchy and Merlin became friends so quickly we may have been hoping for the same thing and that's...
  20. cbowdidge

    How can I help my cat adjust to the new cat

    So, Merlin and Martini DID touch noses but then Merlin hissed! ACK! So close yet so far. Still, progress. 
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