Lots Of Changes, New Kitten, Stressed Out 2 Y.o. Cat

Hi all,

I know there are many similar posts, but I think most of you can understand needing to post because I'm so stressed out.

My cat, Caterpie (named after a pokemon lol) is a 2 year old female, and the kitten is an 11 week old male named Hobi. Caterpie is an active, playful cat, who tries often and unsuccessfully to play with her small dog sister, Kit and chews on things when she gets bored.

I had a friend who rescued a stray who had a litter of only two kittens, and one of the kittens prospective owners fell through. I decided to take the risk of taking him.

We'd just moved upstairs from downstairs in my house, which is new territory for my cat - the upstairs and downstairs are basically two separate apartments. My new roommate has a dog who gets along well with my dog and cries if she's left downstairs, so she insists that her dog stay upstairs during the day. Caterpie is tolerant, but stressed - she swats the dog whenever she gets in her way or gets too close.

I'd planned on picking up Hobi 2-3 weeks after the move, but my friend had a family emergency, and had to travel out of state for about a month, and I had to take him after only a week of my cat "adjusting" to the other changes.

I've kept him in a separate room, and after a couple days opened the door while they eat on opposite sides of the door with him in his crate. At first, Caterpie wouldn't eat at all until I closed the door. Then she'd eat about half her food, growl, and walk away. Then she'd eat all her food, kinda sulk in the area, and wait around. I got her to hang out so I could play with them both. She'd play for a while, hiss and walk away. I even brought him out in his crate into the living room, and she sniffed him nose to nose.

Now, she hisses at the closed door, she hisses and growls whenever she sees him and swats at the cage. She won't play if I try to play with them both, and she scratches at the door if I try and spend any time with him, and then growls and hisses when I open it. She's also been swatting at MY dog when she gets too close, who she's been fine with her entire life. It's been 2 days shy of 2 weeks now.

I have a pheremone diffuser in the place she usually hangs out, which is near the kitten room. I give her loads of attention, talk to her and reassure her I love her, he doesn't have access to her food bowls, toys, or litter box.

Is she just throwing a temporary tantrum? How long is too long for this to keep happening?

Here's a little better one of Caterpie. Like many of the others who posted new kitten and resident cat stress posts, this cat is my baby, and I feel so guilty for causing her so much stress I can barely stand it.

Hi!
Take down the pheromone diffuser and see if that helps, sometimes those actually make things worse. There are other calming products, I'll post a list.

Try some music, there's musicforcats . com, there's an app called Relax My Cat and even classical harp music is known to help calm cats.

Maybe there is something in these;

You, Your Cat And Stress

How To Introduce A Kitten To An Older Cat

They're both gorgeous cats, by the way!!

Only Natural Pet has a product called Just Relax Calming spray with essential oil (catnip oil).

There's this one, be sure and scroll all the way down the page;
Bach Flower Remedies - Rescue Remedy Pets Dogs Cats Horses Birds

Richard's Organics Pet Calm-this one is drops that you put on the tip of the tongue. Also, HomeoPet Anxiety Relief, Head to Tail Calming, Relaxivet Quiet Moments Cat treats, GNC Calming formula, and there is Calm-o-mile, Sentry calming collar, Natures Miracle calming spray, Vetri-Science's Composure is another item to look at, Pet Remedy - UK (it has valerian) is yet another, as is Essential Pet Pet-eze, Pet Organics No Stress, Only Natural Pet (brand and website) has other calming products, Pet Naturals also has one I believe, and there are others.

Also Thunderease has diffusers as does Sentry, Comfort Zone and feliway, although diffusers are expensive and not always an answer.

Lambert Vet Supply is a website to look at, and of course chewy, also there's Petwishpros, animaleo, 1-800-petmeds, Petco and PetSmart, and other pet stores.

There is also a product called a lickimat which could be helpful, as cats can be calmed by the process of licking. The LickiMat - Food Puzzles for Cats

This post talks about some other products;
Calming Treats For A Very Picky Cat

It is a lot of changes. As far as your roommate’s dog, unless they own the place and you have no say in the matter, I would not take their dog for the day. Your legitimate excuse is that your pets are too stressed and her or his dog might get hurt. I am sure it just adds to the stress your cats feel. But regardless two weeks is a very short time to expect Caterpie to be okay with the the newcomer. Hissing, growling and swatting are going to happen. Just stay in the slow intro path and otherwise ignore Caterpie’s bad temper. She is young, she will recover and in all likelihood, once she gets used to Hobi , will actually enjoy having the kitten to play with.

susanm9006 said:

It is a lot of changes. As far as your roommate’s dog, unless they own the place and you have no say in the matter, I would not take their dog for the day. Your legitimate excuse is that your pets are too stressed and her or his dog might get hurt. I am sure it just adds to the stress your cats feel. But regardless two weeks is a very short time to expect Caterpie to be okay with the the newcomer. Hissing, growling and swatting are going to happen. Just stay in the slow intro path and otherwise ignore Caterpie’s bad temper. She is young, she will recover and in all likelihood, once she gets used to Hobi , will actually enjoy having the kitten to play with.

Click to expand...

Thank you! It's a weird setup, downstairs is just a small granny flat - upstairs has the kitchen and larger living room which my boyfriend and I share with my roommate. I set up a pet gate with a small door, so Caterpie has her food, litter box, and my bedroom and bathroom in an area the dog can't get to. Hobi is in a guest room in that same area behind the gate - he doesn't mind the dogs at all. I've tried talking to her about it a bunch of times, and she is very clearly unhappy with the idea of having her dog downstairs, even though I offered to have my dog stay down with her so she's not alone and they get along. I have human drama there I have to be careful with since it's a shared space.

Furballsmom said:

They're both gorgeous cats, by the way!!

Only Natural Pet has a product called Just Relax Calming spray with essential oil (catnip oil).

There's this one, be sure and scroll all the way down the page;
Bach Flower Remedies - Rescue Remedy Pets Dogs Cats Horses Birds

Richard's Organics Pet Calm-this one is drops that you put on the tip of the tongue. Also, HomeoPet Anxiety Relief, Head to Tail Calming, Relaxivet Quiet Moments Cat treats, GNC Calming formula, and there is Calm-o-mile, Sentry calming collar, Natures Miracle calming spray, Vetri-Science's Composure is another item to look at, Pet Remedy - UK (it has valerian) is yet another, as is Essential Pet Pet-eze, Pet Organics No Stress, Only Natural Pet (brand and website) has other calming products, Pet Naturals also has one I believe, and there are others.

Also Thunderease has diffusers as does Sentry, Comfort Zone and feliway, although diffusers are expensive and not always an answer.

Lambert Vet Supply is a website to look at, and of course chewy, also there's Petwishpros, animaleo, 1-800-petmeds, Petco and PetSmart, and other pet stores.

There is also a product called a lickimat which could be helpful, as cats can be calmed by the process of licking. The LickiMat - Food Puzzles for Cats

This post talks about some other products;
Calming Treats For A Very Picky Cat

Click to expand...

Thank you, this is so helpful. I'm just reading a lot of other people's posts, and I feel like I'm doing something wrong having the baby unable to roam the house for so long.

Hi chelsea.troy , your photos are beautiful.
I don't think you are doing anything wrong. I think it's just natural to be excited about the new place and kitten, and wanting all our animals to get along.
We usually want this to happen instantly.
But then not realize that it may take more time for the resident cat to accept the changes.

You may have just slightly rushed the cat-to-cat introductions, or rather the kitten to the resident cat intros. (looking at your kitten Hobi...I could totally understand why. )
(as susanm9006 mentioned ...2 weeks is a very short time)

What I would do is start from the beginning, again.
Take one week to work on each step of the cat introductions.
You usually use the five senses as a guide to lessen a cat's 'fight or flight' response.

1. they have already heard each other, and can eat behind close doors, so that is good. (As long as Caterpie is eating, pooping and peeing as usual, then this is a good thing.)
   
2. Next is Scent Exchange...meaning 'scent swapping'... using each cats' toys, blankets, towels, etc...where each cat only gets to smell the scent of the other cat. In this way, they both get accustomed to each others smells, so when they do meet, face to face, they will seem like a familiar friend, and not any threat.
3. Watch closely how Caterpie reacts to the items from Hobi, and see if her 'fight or flight' responses lessen.
4. Then move on to 'Seeing each other'...by using your baby gates, or the crate, with the kitten inside. (I know that they have already done this, but you could still gauge how each cat reacts.) Getting Caterpie to play around Hobi's crate, and giving treats, after good interactions will reinforce positive experiences.
5. Then do an entire room swap, but because Caterpie is in a new place, ..then this may stress her more...so maybe just do this...if you think she is calm and curious about who's in her territory.
6. Lastly, I think it's the meeting, face to face, but only when Caterpie and Hobi are both calm...probably tired out after a play session.

There is no reason why Hobi cannot have the run of the place, as long as Caterpie is safely behind her own door. You have to teach him the litterbox, and all those fun kitten stuff, anyhow. As well as meeting the dogs, and getting used to the place.

I already noticed from your 1st photo, that you have a vertical space for Caterpie to relax in. If you can make more vertical spaces, for your cats to get high up on, away from each other, or the dogs, then that will help, too.
Always have an escape route, for each cat to follow, so they never feel cornered.

ps. Have fun with the process, too.
Take a lot of photos, and enjoy these moments.
They grow up so fast. (also post a lot of photos, we all love photos on TCS.)

I remember reading every forum while I was freaking out, so I feel like I should give an update.

They were separated for 2.5ish weeks only letting them roam separately while scent swapping. Then I started letting him out with her out for 30 min, then an hour, then a couple hours as long as nothing crazy happened.

After a while, Caterpie started tolerating Hobi, and now they play with toys together and chase each other around. There's still some hissing when he tries to play fight with her, and she's not having it, but overall I think she's starting to enjoy having a brother

chelsea.troy said:

I think she's starting to enjoy having a brother

Click to expand...