The Neighbor's Cat

SilverIris

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Hi everyone!

I'm not quite sure if this is the right thread for this sort of thing, so if there's somewhere more appropriate, please direct me there!

Our new neighbors have a young 'indoor' black cat who's out and about all the time. He's not neutered, and I'm not sure about his vaccination status but I seriously doubt that he's had his shots. They have an unfortunate habit of leaving for periods of time without ensuring that he's in the house, which means he's stuck outside. He a chatty guy, so I can always hear him meowing at the door to be let in.

We've taken to feeding him and giving him water when he's around. He's incredibly affectionate, but also very dirty (fortunately our permafrost goes deep enough that fleas aren't a huge issue). He's started meowing at our door to get in the house, but we have cats of our own, and I don't want to risk them catching anything (and they're fairly hostile towards him, so I don't think it would go well) so I'll just go sit with him for a bit.

Does anyone have any advice? Ideally, I'd love to take him to the vet and get him checked out, but he's not my cat. I'm also hesitant to talk to the neighbor's about him (their late night screaming matches really haven't made a good impression), and I'm worried that if I do, they'll get on my case about feeding him. Additionally, summer is coming to an end, and I don't know what to do when the colder weather comes around. He's such a sweet little guy, and it would break my heart to find him on the side of the road if he gets hit by a car.

Thanks in advance!
 

jefferd18

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Hi everyone!

I'm not quite sure if this is the right thread for this sort of thing, so if there's somewhere more appropriate, please direct me there!

Our new neighbors have a young 'indoor' black cat who's out and about all the time. He's not neutered, and I'm not sure about his vaccination status but I seriously doubt that he's had his shots. They have an unfortunate habit of leaving for periods of time without ensuring that he's in the house, which means he's stuck outside. He a chatty guy, so I can always hear him meowing at the door to be let in.

We've taken to feeding him and giving him water when he's around. He's incredibly affectionate, but also very dirty (fortunately our permafrost goes deep enough that fleas aren't a huge issue). He's started meowing at our door to get in the house, but we have cats of our own, and I don't want to risk them catching anything (and they're fairly hostile towards him, so I don't think it would go well) so I'll just go sit with him for a bit.

Does anyone have any advice? Ideally, I'd love to take him to the vet and get him checked out, but he's not my cat. I'm also hesitant to talk to the neighbor's about him (their late night screaming matches really haven't made a good impression), and I'm worried that if I do, they'll get on my case about feeding him. Additionally, summer is coming to an end, and I don't know what to do when the colder weather comes around. He's such a sweet little guy, and it would break my heart to find him on the side of the road if he gets hit by a car.

Thanks in advance!

Right now its about the cat. I wouldn't confront anyone, I would just quietly take him to the vet and see if anything is going on with him. He needs a home with love, not a life with a quarrelsome couple who don't seem to have the time for him. If you can't adopt him maybe you know somebody who could, or perhaps your vet does.
 

kittychick

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Welcome! I'm so glad you found this site. There are so many members here with experience in so many "cat situations"...all ready to offer suggestions, help, a friendly ear, and when needed...a soft shoulder. So I'm very glad you're here - - we'll do our best to help you.

First - thanks SO much for caring about this kitty, enough so to try to do what's best for him. Too many people just turn their heads when they see animals in need. It sounds like this little guy needs love and a safe place to call home, and it doesn't sound like his current "home" is overly concerned about his welfare.

This is a bit of a thorny one. It sounds like his "family" aren't exactly the kind of people I'd want to cross, as they sound as though they might take their frustration with what they'd likely perceive as criticism, and it's quite possible they'll take their frustration out on either you or the kitty. I absolutely understand that all you're wanting to do is help, but having worked at and volunteered for shelters for about 30 years now (wow I'm ancient!) - - and also having done alot of TNR - trap/neuter/release- with feral kitties, I've learned over the years that often people who aren't treating their animals well don't want to hear anything about how they're doing things wrong. That's certainly not true in every case - sometimes people just don't know they're doing wrong by the kitty. But since it does sound as though you're concerned about the behavior you've witnessed from them, I'd be very cautious about approaching them directly, as it's possible they'll take their frustration out on you OR the kitty. But I do think you have options...

1. Obviously you could just talk to them as kindly as possible, trying to be non-confrontational. It's risky on several fronts, and I certainly wouldn't approach them by yourself. And yes - I'd be concerned about the welfare of the cat afterwards.

2. Depending on where you live and the laws concerning pets where you are, you could report them for animal cruelty - and many places will let you do so anonymously. Where I live though, it has to be proven that they've left the animal often and for lengthy periods without food, water or proper shelter. And unfortunately, it usually results in the people being reported getting the chance to "clean up their act" - - and while sometimes people do change their ways, more often than not, the animal "disappears." And if he's taken by authorities, depending on how cats are handled where you are, it's definitely possible he'll be taken to a shelter that does NOT practice "no kill."

3. You could bring him in and give him a home yourself (but definitely not until he's been thoroughly vetted and neutered - particularly since you already have cats). You obviously risk him upsetting the balance at your home (although many of us here could walk you through "slow introductions" - - it's possible your indoor crew dislikes him right now because he's a threat - an interloper. A slow introduction could change all of that completely. That said - - as much as I'd want to try that - - I'd be concerned your neighbor would find out (by either seeing him in the window, or having another neighbor tell them) and be very upset with you, perhaps even coming after you legally. Unlikely, but possible.

4. (While I'd be VERY tempted to try #3, but I think this is what I, personally, would do). I'd get him to a vet to be at least checked out, given his shots, and get him neutered (can you hold him for a day post-neuter somewhere like a spare bedroom or a bathroom?). At the same time (or even before) I'd get pictures of him, and I'd start talking to everyone I know (who DOESN'T know your neighbors! ;)), showing them his pics (since he sounds adorable - - plus he's got a sad story to tug on people's heart strings!!!!!), and seeing if they can give him a home. Or....if they can't....ask them if they can talk to everyone they know about how this little guy needs a safe home (a new home will be much more likely to be found if he's already vetted and neutered!!!!). I'd resist putting anything on your social media, since the neighbors could trace that back to you. I'd also be talking to local no-kill shelters - they'll likely be full when you first talk to them, but get on a waiting list, and visit/call often to see if he can be moved up. I'd advise against telling a shelter that it's your neighbor's cat (actually - very loosely his cat :argh:) - -but they likely won't take him if they know he is "someone else's cat." :(

In the meantime, I'd get him set up as comfortably as possible outside until a home can be found. Set up a shelter outside, somewhere where the neighbor can't see it. Such shelters are often sold by spay/neuter clinics for a very small cost, or you can make one yourself. Here's a link to a page showing options on buying and making yourself (we've made MANY of the rubbermaid shelters - they're easy!) Add some straw (not hay!!!) inside, and even a warming mat if necessary (although hopefully he'll have a wonderful new home before he'll need that!)

Feral Cat Shelter Options

Then make sure you have food and water out for him at all times (again - out of sight of the neighbors is probably smartest - and out of sight of your indoor kitties so they don't feel threatened), and then you can keep him fed and sheltered and warm until you can find him a home where he'll be loved!

Keep us all posted. Sounds like this little guy found the right person to help him be safe, warm, well-fed and well-loved before the cold weather swoops in!
 

fionasmom

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When I have been in similar situations I have followed the advice posted by kittychick kittychick . Believe me, these people are already screamers and they are not taking care of their cat, so it is unlikely that they are suddenly going to become reasonable and appreciative of your advice or offer of help. If you tip your hand and they know you are "watching" the cat, it all goes south from there.
 

Avery

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Great advice above. I was just wondering... do you think your neighbors really just don't want this cat? I had a situation several years ago with a little dog that lived across the street from me. It broke my heart because he was left outside and ignored for long periods of time. I didn't know the owners well, but started being friendly over time and finally learned (after asking some friendly questions!) that they really didn't want this dog, they had taken him after a relative died, and they felt stuck. I started asking everyone I knew and was able to find someone who wanted the dog and I made the match! Actually had to drive the little guy about three hours away to his new home. The neighbors were happy to see him go.

If you felt comfortable talking to these people, or had another neighbor who was friends with them, maybe you will learn that they don't even want this cat. You would have to start out with other topics over a period of time, but then mention something about the cat... kind of work your way up to it. You can then offer to take it, or tell them you have a friend would love to have a little black cat, or some other story.

Just a thought!
 

vyger

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I think Avery is on the right track at least to start. I have found often the best way to get information from someone is to play dumb. I did interviews for the Census Bureau for a few years and did work with hostile people on occasion. So you go in as an ignorant person, not knowing anything and ask questions. Let them tell you things even if you already know.
Simple question to start is "Hey do you know who's cats this is, it's been hanging around my house a lot?" They may tell you right off that they don't want it , problem solved. Probe for information, let them do the talking as much as you can. Many people will get started and just keep on going. If they are having problems you could even end up getting told all about that too as people in stressful situations with no one to share with will easily open up to a sympathetic ear. If they indicate that they have trouble taking care of it offer to help. Can they can give you food to give to it when it comes over to visit?
I think you get my drift. Stay positive, let them do as much talking as they are willing to do, find out using probing questions what the circumstances are and with good information you can figure out where to go from there. The worse case scenario might be that you could end up becoming friends. Probably not what your looking for since you can get dragged into something you don't want to be involved in and domestic disputes can be pretty bad. But then sometimes people in bad situations really need a good friend.

By the way, unneutered cats are experts at escaping and staying out. That is likely a big part of the problem. And once he starts spraying around the inside of their house you can believe he is going to be tossed out on his own.
 
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