"one Liners"

Jem

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I always have the TV or movies playing in the house as I go about my business/chores. I often watch the same movies over again, not only because I like them, but because I know what's going to happen. I don't have to really pay too much attention, yet still be entertained. My favorite movies are comedies and action (which usually have some comedic relief in them too). Today for example, Pirates of the Caribbean (the first one) was on. I absolutely love the Jack Sparrow character, as well as the two idiot pirates (the one with the fake eye and his buddy). There are several funny scenes with all of them. To which brings me to why I'm posting. I don't know if people give enough credit to the one liners in movies, I love them. The timing, the tone...Sometimes I find that one liners are funnier than a whole comedic scene, especially when you're not even watching a "comedy" but rather an action or drama.
So what are some of your favorite "one liners"?
 

KarenKat

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I love the part in The Wedding Singer when Adam Sandler is making his limo driver friend audition. He told his friend that he knocked over two cones and didn’t get the job. I always giggle at his friends response - mostly because his tone is hilarious.

“They were cones!” :dunno:
 

1 bruce 1

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I get ya there :thumbsup:
There's an episode of Three's Company that just kills me (no pun). If you know the series, it's the one where the random mean guy thinks Jack is coming onto his girl at the Beagle so he fakes his own death to keep from getting beat up. When they told the girl that it was his heart, Terry Kiser (the mean guy) tells her, in the most serious voice with the most deadpan bland expression, "God forgot to wind it." It was something about his voice, his accent, his expression, the little piece of hair sticking up on his head and the camera angle but it kills me.
Here's a link, It's at 20:10, but if you've got time I'd recommend watching the entire thing :lol2:
 

kashmir64

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They aren't stand alone one liners, but I roll every time.

Lucifer - "Never knew how appropriate the term was until now, did you". (describing mom and dad)

Lucifer (again) "Lately we've been playing music by this chap named Bieber, gosh you should hear the screams" (describing the music in Hell)
 

Margret

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This is the one-liner that convinced me that Rob Reiner is a genius of a director. André the Giant had to learn all his lines by rote, since he had trouble with English, and he'd forgotten his line, so Billy Crystal fed him the correct line. Most directors would have yelled "Cut!" and filmed the scene again, but Reiner recognized that it was actually funnier with the line coming from Miracle Max than from Fezzik.


Margret
 

Margret

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In the television series Amen, starring Sherman Hemsley, they did a Christmas episode named "The Twelve Songs of Christmas." In the episode a choir contest has been announced, and everyone has a different idea of which Christmas song the church's choir ought to sing in the contest. Here they are arguing about it:


Rolly Forbes, the old gentleman who says he's never cared for "Mary's Boy Child" (beginning at 9:20 in the video) was played by Jester Hairston, the songwriter who originally wrote "Mary's Boy Child."

Margret
 

1 bruce 1

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In the television series Amen, starring Sherman Hemsley, they did a Christmas episode named "The Twelve Songs of Christmas." In the episode a choir contest has been announced, and everyone has a different idea of which Christmas song the church's choir ought to sing in the contest. Here they are arguing about it:


Rolly Forbes, the old gentleman who says he's never cared for "Mary's Boy Child" (beginning at 9:20 in the video) was played by Jester Hairston, the songwriter who originally wrote "Mary's Boy Child."

Margret
HOW did I forget about the show Amen :flail: It was so underrated. Thanks for the link (and the reminder to re-watch some of the oldies but goodies ;))
 

doomsdave

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The Lord in His wisdom invented the fly
And then forgot to tell us why

Well, it's two lines, but it's still punchy.
 

kashmir64

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cheeser

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Pretty much any line of dialogue from Airplane! or Young Frankenstein. :)
 

kashmir64

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"Just imagine how awful it might have been if we'd have been at all competent". - Good Omens
 
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