Introductions—shy Resident And Sassy Kitten

Hi all, I’m currently introducing my new kitten Clove (3.5mo female) to my resident cat Chilli (4yr female). Things are going okay so far, but as usual, I’m stressing over every detail and trying to make sure I do this the right way. I figured I would make a thread as I would really appreciate the general advice and feedback of the experts here—you were all SO helpful last time I went through the introduction process!

I have introduced adult cats to each other but not a kitten to an adult. Clove was a bit timid and shy at first but has become quite active and sassy. Chilli’s personality is pretty gentle and easygoing but she is shy at first as well.

Clove has only been here a day, but she is already trying to dash out of the safe room (tiny bathroom) when I open the door. She is very comfy and confident in there and tends to meow when left alone.

I think we’ve made good progress for only one day, but I also hope I’m not rushing anything. I’m trying to gauge both cats’ stress levels and act accordingly. There’s been no hissing or stalking at all, just some skittishness on both sides.

So far:
- some scent swapping with towels (basically no reaction from either cat other than a couple sniffs)
- feeding treats and meals on either side of the door (no issues, gradually moving bowls closer)
- baby gate up during the day with a sheet over it (Clove wants to climb it, Chilli isn’t very interested in going over there in the first place)
- playtime with both cats near the door to increase confidence
- site swapping—with a friend’s help I let Clove explore the apartment and put Chilli in the bathroom, just for about 15-20 minutes since Chilli gets very grumpy when she’s locked up! Chilli just walked around the bathroom, ate some kitten food, and meowed to be let out. Clove was a bit skittish but walked around exploring a good chunk of the apartment, played with a toy, and ate treats. Pretty uneventful. The swapping itself was the most stressful since neither cat likes being picked up, so I think next time I’ll use a carrier. I wish I could swap them for longer, but I don’t want to stress Chilli out by keeping her in there.

Both cats have definitely heard and smelled each other by now. They’ve also seen each other through the few inches at the bottom of the baby gate, and accidentally saw each other more clearly when Clove first arrived. Chilli has done a little staring and is a little cautious of the bathroom door, but otherwise is very calm and acting like her ordinary self. MUCH calmer and more relaxed than when I introduced my late adult cat Chai to her. Not hiding upstairs at all, no “evil eye”, and happy to play and hang out downstairs even when the kitten is meowing nearby.

Clove has growled a couple times when she smells/hears Chilli outside the bathroom. (No growling when she sees Chilli, though—just cautious watching and meowing). Amidst the growling, she gets quite skittish and wants to hide. She’s VERY tiny and petite compared to that big fluffy Norwegian Forest Cat! Toys and treats usually adequately distract her. She also gets a bit growly when held for too long, at strange/loud noises, or if when I’m not giving her her treat quickly enough, so I’m not sure if it’s fear or dominance or aggression or just a wiggly, insecure kitten with lots of personality in a brand new scary home! She’s never purposely scratched, bitten, or hissed and is generally very loving and full of purrs. She also lived with her mom and sibling until now, so it’s not that she’s been isolated from other cats.

How does everything sound so far? I know it’s extremely early days yet, but I know kitten-to-adult intros generally take a lot less time than adult-to-adult. I hate to have Clove stuck in the bathroom any longer than I have to, but I also don’t want to rush. Thanks in advance!!

Kittens are often easier. The main problem is the older cat getting stressed, but so far your not seeing warning signs, so that is great! I feel like there can still be problems during the actual meeting if the kitten gets jumpy and that bothers the older cat. So the goal of the intro is so that the older cat can correctly realize thats play. YMMV on that, but that is the hope. I think, if you don't see warnings signs of stress, a few more days would be reasonable.

I've never used the baby gates, but I will next time because I feel like that is just really targeted to the issues, as the older cat can see the little kitten trying to play, sticking the paw through the gate and begging "play with me" *without* getting jumped on before the big cat is ready. Hopefully that sort of thing happens soon. Maybe you can even encourage that with a lure toy.

So...your doing great, relax a little. It doesn't necessarily need to be hard; so far the signals are suggesting it wont be. You'll continue a bit to be prudent, but just keep up the good work.

Sounds excellent so far. As good as it is going I would be ready to let them meet now, but that is just me. Just know that there will be hissing and growling and don't let that bother you. They are simply communicating. Let them do it. I always tell people to have a laser pointer ready to distract them if they get too focused on each other.

Remember:
They sense your stress so relax.
Don't worry over growling and hissing, and don't scold them for doing it.
Watch them at first when they come face to face, and separate them after a bit if they seem stressed, and when you are away.

Good to know Chilli isn't giving the "evil eye" this time. That in itself makes it sound like maybe they're ready to meet.

I know you've already read this, so I'm posting the link mostly for any future readers who come across this thread, and haven't read it.

How To Introduce A Kitten To An Older Cat

Thank you everyone—this may end up being a very easy introduction! They saw each other very clearly through the baby gate tonight while eating treats about 4 ft apart. Chilli barely looked at the kitten and does not seem to view her as a threat at all. She just walked over, ate her treat, glanced up again, and sauntered casually away like, “okay, too much annoying kitten meowing for me.” Clove didn’t seem to fixate on Chilli either. She was watching her, but was more concerned with eating the treats and rubbing on the baby gate and meowing at me.

However Chilli is feeling a bit under the weather today (I’m assuming hairball), so that may be part of why her response was so lackluster. She got her hairball medicine and we’ll hope she starts to feel better tomorrow. Don’t want to bombard her with a kitten jumping all over her until she’s feeling 100%. If tomorrow morning they are doing fine with each other thru the baby gate, I think I’ll put Clove in the 2 story cat cage that’s in my living room so she can scope out the rest of the place from a safe spot (and Chilli can get a better look at her).

Oops, I spoke too soon. They met again through the baby gate, without treats this time, and it wasn’t quite so friendly. But I don’t think it was a bad interaction per se. Clove became the fluffiest “scariest” kitten ever! Her skinny tail looked like a little fluffed up pine tree. She was growling a bit. Chilli hissed at her a couple times. I brought out the treats and both cats accepted treats—Clove calmed down pretty much immediately after eating treats and Chilli decided to leave again with an annoyed look on her face after eating her treats. Another day of baby gate interactions may be best.

Yeah, I'd be patient. Who knows if a few more days will actually help, but you don't want to be a year down the road and have them still be unfriendly with each other and wonder if a longer intro might have helped. Cats can work a lot of stuff out when you let them interact, but some stuff can really linger.

rosegold said:

Hi all, I’m currently introducing my new kitten Clove (3.5mo female) to my resident cat Chilli (4yr female). Things are going okay so far, but as usual, I’m stressing over every detail and trying to make sure I do this the right way. I figured I would make a thread as I would really appreciate the general advice and feedback of the experts here—you were all SO helpful last time I went through the introduction process!

I have introduced adult cats to each other but not a kitten to an adult. Clove was a bit timid and shy at first but has become quite active and sassy. Chilli’s personality is pretty gentle and easygoing but she is shy at first as well.

Clove has only been here a day, but she is already trying to dash out of the safe room (tiny bathroom) when I open the door. She is very comfy and confident in there and tends to meow when left alone.


I think we’ve made good progress for only one day, but I also hope I’m not rushing anything. I’m trying to gauge both cats’ stress levels and act accordingly. There’s been no hissing or stalking at all, just some skittishness on both sides.

So far:
- some scent swapping with towels (basically no reaction from either cat other than a couple sniffs)
- feeding treats and meals on either side of the door (no issues, gradually moving bowls closer)
- baby gate up during the day with a sheet over it (Clove wants to climb it, Chilli isn’t very interested in going over there in the first place)
- playtime with both cats near the door to increase confidence
- site swapping—with a friend’s help I let Clove explore the apartment and put Chilli in the bathroom, just for about 15-20 minutes since Chilli gets very grumpy when she’s locked up! Chilli just walked around the bathroom, ate some kitten food, and meowed to be let out. Clove was a bit skittish but walked around exploring a good chunk of the apartment, played with a toy, and ate treats. Pretty uneventful. The swapping itself was the most stressful since neither cat likes being picked up, so I think next time I’ll use a carrier. I wish I could swap them for longer, but I don’t want to stress Chilli out by keeping her in there.

Both cats have definitely heard and smelled each other by now. They’ve also seen each other through the few inches at the bottom of the baby gate, and accidentally saw each other more clearly when Clove first arrived. Chilli has done a little staring and is a little cautious of the bathroom door, but otherwise is very calm and acting like her ordinary self. MUCH calmer and more relaxed than when I introduced my late adult cat Chai to her. Not hiding upstairs at all, no “evil eye”, and happy to play and hang out downstairs even when the kitten is meowing nearby.

Clove has growled a couple times when she smells/hears Chilli outside the bathroom. (No growling when she sees Chilli, though—just cautious watching and meowing). Amidst the growling, she gets quite skittish and wants to hide. She’s VERY tiny and petite compared to that big fluffy Norwegian Forest Cat! Toys and treats usually adequately distract her. She also gets a bit growly when held for too long, at strange/loud noises, or if when I’m not giving her her treat quickly enough, so I’m not sure if it’s fear or dominance or aggression or just a wiggly, insecure kitten with lots of personality in a brand new scary home! She’s never purposely scratched, bitten, or hissed and is generally very loving and full of purrs. She also lived with her mom and sibling until now, so it’s not that she’s been isolated from other cats.

How does everything sound so far? I know it’s extremely early days yet, but I know kitten-to-adult intros generally take a lot less time than adult-to-adult. I hate to have Clove stuck in the bathroom any longer than I have to, but I also don’t want to rush. Thanks in advance!!
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I keep babies over night in a dog crate in the bedroom, with a clear view of me. They have the comfort of "company", but you can sort of sleep not having to worry about what they're in to. Also, Chilli can sniff Clove if she wants to, and march off if she doesn't.

Don't be worried by growling. It's natural. So is a smack (from Chilli). If it goes beyond a clawless smack (which I've only witnessed once in 20 years, and it was between two outside cats) then you want to grab the baby.

Sadly, I know nothing about introductions because I have always had only cats, but I remember your posts about introducing Chili and Chai, and notice that you haven't mentioned Chai. Are you now a 3-cat household?

Congrats on adopting Clove, who is adorable.

I think using your cat crate is a great idea when you older is feeling better. Great way for each to get used to the others presence while still feeling safe.

Etarre said:

Sadly, I know nothing about introductions because I have always had only cats, but I remember your posts about introducing Chili and Chai, and notice that you haven't mentioned Chai. Are you now a 3-cat household?

Congrats on adopting Clove, who is adorable.

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Hi Etarre, sadly Chai passed away a few weeks ago after suddenly developing FIP. It was horrible and unfair and there was nothing I could do. I miss her so much and am still very much grieving. Luckily getting Clove has been a wonderful (although bittersweet) comfort and distraction, especially since she reminds me of a baby Chai.

rosegold said:

Hi Etarre, sadly Chai passed away a few weeks ago after suddenly developing FIP. It was horrible and unfair and there was nothing I could do. I miss her so much and am still very much grieving. Luckily getting Clove has been a wonderful (although bittersweet) comfort and distraction, especially since she reminds me of a baby Chai.

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I'm sorry for your loss.
The introductions to me sound really good and normal.
Puffy Kitten Syndrome almost always happens. It's pure adrenaline, not necessarily aggression. (And, it's so cute!)
We can't replace our old friends, but we can extend that love and make new ones and bring them into the circle. Many happy years to you and little Clove.

I put Clove in the cat crate in the living room and everything is going awesome so far! Chilli watched her from her cat tree for a while and I don’t think Clove even saw her at first, she was just playing and trying to climb the bars. 10 min later Chilli came over to sniff everything. She didn’t try to interact with Clove, just glanced at her a few times—but no tail lashing while sniffing the crate and she even rubbed on me and accepted treats. It was good because Clove was on the 2nd floor of the cat crate so she was “taller” than Chilli. She was very scared and frozen but has slowly started to calm down. No hisses or growls this time, surprisingly. Chilli is just hanging out on the rug grooming now, about 8 feet away, while Clove watches her (and tries to keep her eyes open... it’s past kitten’s naptime! )

I think Chilli seems perfectly fine with the new addition and will be a great teacher for a sassy kitten. She was always very patient and fair with Chai (who was basically a kitten at only a year or two old) and was not overly liberal with the smacks and hisses, even when Chai was very annoying. Hopefully it will be the same situation here. Chilli seems super calm and comfortable right now.

They’ve been coexisting in the living room (Clove free outside of the crate) for about two hours now! Clove was quite skittish at first but her confidence is improving and she’s been playing, eating, drinking. Chilli is being a very good girl and mostly watching/napping/grooming from afar. However if Chilli approaches or tries to sniff Clove, Clove becomes a fluffy scaredycat and hisses, spits, growls and runs away. Chilli doesn’t seem that fazed—she hisses once or twice and then leaves her alone. No one is stalking or continuously approaching the other, and both are easily distracted from staring, so I think they are working it out.

How's it going now? Any pictures to share?

They are both sleeping peacefully in the living room right now! Clove is still being a fluffy hissy kitten, but she gets a bit less scared and recovers a bit faster every time they interact. She's also fully explored most of the apartment now, except for the loft. Chilli is being wonderful. I think Clove's hissy growly antics are more amusing to her than anything else.

I didn't take any pictures of them together, but here is a cute video from earlier!

Very cute. No one looks stressed either. So seems things are going well.

doing great! My kittens loved tunnels and hiding spots the first week during introductions ... I had the entire room full with boxes ( holes in sides and top to facilitate escapes ) - they all had a blast ... I think the boxes offered a lot of distraction and exploring something that smelled new ( not just the new cats). I also bought a new cat tree - new territory for all 3 and a ball track toy which kept everyone happy and entertained for hours ...

Clove is still being QUITE hissy and bristly at Chilli. Now that her confidence has grown, she has even charged at and swatted at Chilli a few times. Chilli really doesn't seem to react much one way or the other. She either sits there and watches with mild curiosity or jumps a bit and walks away if startled.

This video is an exception, where Chilli actually jumped forward with a swat, but even still her discipline seems pretty mild. I guess that's fine, right?


Chilli isn't acting scared or upset at all in general--she's rolling around on the floor and slow blinking at the kitten most of the time. Still eating and playing normally and everything. I just want to make sure the kitten's behavior isn't stressing her.

Today Clove also has started trying to interact with Chilli for the first time by means of pouncing on her fluffy tail. Both times resulted in Chilli getting startled and spinning around with a swat, and Clove fleeing and growling and acting like she's being unfairly attacked. Chilli doesn't chase or pursue her and Clove comes back around in a few minutes.

As you know, I've never done cat introductions, but we always say, if there's no blood, fur flying, and the kitten doesn't seem scared and keeps coming back, it's probably all good.

That was no where near a cat fight, but the TCS article Are My Cats Fighting Or Playing? mentions body language to watch for, as well includes a video of a real cat fight, plus ones of cats playing.