My New Cat Has Been Acting Strange And I'm Very Worried

Context :

I hope I'm in the right place to talk about this. Me and my boyfriend adopted a new cat over a week ago from a couple living in an apartment who couldn't keep him anymore due to one of them having an allergy and moving. He's two years old, sterilized, vaccinated and overall in very good health. The previous owners had one other male cat, so he was used to playing with another cat before we adopted him. When I contacted the previous owners, I stressed that he had to be an indoor cat, as I live in a rented town house with no garden. The owner confirmed this.

My past experiences with cats :

Before I moved in with my boyfriend, I lived with my parents in a country house. A perfect hunting ground for cats, but a lot of people liked to treat the road going through our village as a Formula 1 racing track. We had about five cats at different times in that house, so I'm no stranger to living with them. However this is the first time I've got my own. I don't want children, ever. So I feel like a mother to my new cat, and I'm a lot more emotionally attached than my parents are to cats. Every cat we ever owned ended up being hit by a car, disappearing or contracting an illness. As we all now, outdoor cats live barely half the life of an indoor one. That's why even if I did have a garden, I'd never let my new cat outside alone.

The problem :

He's adorable, well-behaved and affectionate.
At least he was.
It took him about a week to fully adjust. He was very jumpy, very timid and scared of brusque movements. Yet even though he stayed in his favourite hiding place under the bed, he'd purr and roll around when you reached under to stroke him. Little by little, he began to gain confidence in walking around the household. Lots of cuddles ensued.
Yesterday we went to the swimming pool with some friends. We were gone for a few hours, and then came back to have a meal at our place. One of our friends has a cat, but he riled up ours too much by playing with him (wiggling his fingers around and reaching back before he got scratched). Everyone wanted to get his attention and I don't think he liked it. I also don't think he appreciated being left alone for so long.
That night he slept by my feet, which he doesn't usually do. I woke up to seeing his chin resting on my foot, but he seemed... Depressed?
That morning I cleaned his litter box, and that's when things got weird. He started running around and meowing.
His previous owner told us that he's a very verbal cat, so it's really hard to tell if he's meowing for the sake of conversation, or if there's something wrong. His meows have gone from light and happy (sort of like a "prrring?" sound) to an almost sad/annoyed "mreeeooowwww..."

What I don't understand :

His litterbox is always clean. He drinks and eats plenty (dried food with some paté from time to time), his waste shows no signs of ill-health. He gets enough rest, so I doubt he's sleep-deprived. His litterbox is in the quietest, calmest room in the house and far away from his food. I haven't been playing with him a lot, so that's what I did today. I've also ordered a catnip ball and a laser pointer to help him burn off energy.

I want to buy a harness and give him walks, but he seems to be a timid and jumpy cat by nature and I'd be devastated if he slipped out of one in a panic and injured himself. I don't want to traumatise him.

His current behaviour :

When he sees me, he gives me that sad/annoyed meow. He follows me a lot and does the same meow every time I say something to him. Sometimes he rolls onto his back in front of me, but he's completely stopped rubbing his face against my hand when I present it to him, and instead just seems unfazed. He doesn't seem to enjoy being stroked either.

What's going on? I know cats can go through phases, but what's got me worried is his meow. It doesn't sound happy at all. Yet he doesn't seem in pain and acts normal otherwise. Our house is clean, and big enough for him to run around and play. He also doesn't scratch at windows or doors like he wants to get out.

I'm very worried. I miss him being affectionate!

Update : He's started being more affectionate again. But that meow's still there.

...Do cats sulk? Is he just mad at me or something? Is that a thing?

Hello and welcome to The Cat Site. Congrats on the adoption of your new cat.

It's hard to really know what's going through a cat's mind at any time, but you mentioned his previous owner said he was very vocal, so I'm wondering, if he's just "talking" to you. He's also probably still adjusting to you and his new home. And probably a little stressed from the over exertion yesterday with your guests.

TCS has various articles on various topics under Articles | TheCatSite.

I'll post a few specific links that may be helpful.
How To Help A New Cat Adjust To Your Home
16 Top Cat Experts Share Tips For Dealing With Timid Cats
Is Your Cat Stressed Out?
Cat Sounds - Feline Vocal Communication
Your Cat Probably Hates It When You...
14 Cat Experts Reveal: How To Get A Cat To Like Me
25 Signs That Your Cat Loves You

Please post a pic of your boy either in this thread, or start his own thread in our New Cats on the Block forum.
How To Add A Picture To Your Forum Post

When we adopted ours she would make this mournful meow the moment I went into her room. (We started her in a bathroom.) It was just her saying, “I’m scared, I really like you, but I’m a still a little scared.) She would eat and use her box and purr up a storm, but that nervous meow has all but disappeared now (unless there’s a scary change), and now she has started rubbing too. She was too timid for that I guess? I’m sure he will love it with you, and he likes and trusts you enough to tell you how he feels.

Maybe I'm reading too much into this, but now that it's been a significant amount of time away from his original family, he's wondering what's going on and if they're ever coming back. When we moved to a new apartment with my previous cat, she used to sit by the door and meow and I really do think she was saying..."nice apartment and all, but when are we going back home?"

I think we understand things like moving and rehoming or adopting cats and we forget that the cats don't, and might be really confused. He may just need reassurance that he's not going to be moved again to yet another family.

My cat is very verbal and does the same. In my case it's either because he wants food, to go outside, attention, or he is just in the hunting mood.
He also seems to get hyper when he needs the pee as he is fussy about his litter tray.
But my cat was never timid. Has always been confident.

By the way if your friend has a cat, it could be the scent he doesn't like.

I believe cats sulk; Shinobi has one particular chair he only sits on when he’s been stopped doing something (like not being allowed to live in the dishwasher). He can see everything from the chair and pretends to sleep and watches and has such look of “I am the most deprived cat in the whole world, why can’t I live amongst the plates” . If we really rub him he turns his head away.
After about half an hour he slinks over to sit by the fire and near us and Dodger, and climbs on top of us for purrs and biscuit making. He’s after getting so big it’s hard to remember he’s a kid testing boundaries and reactions.

Since you mentioned the litter box, Shin has only lately stopped reprimanding us for cleaning his litter box, he used to mew like we were the worst people on earth and run around the box. Now he sits like a loaf of bread and watches like “you’re welcome, that was some good poop, huh?”.

Over a week is no time for your kitty to learn you guys and for him to learn ye. He might be missing playing with another cat a lot too so maybe a playing routine might get him more used to the fact his new humans are fun and lovely.

Hi. You said dry food with pate from time to time. So he's not getting canned food every day? I would try that and see if it helps. Wet food is very important for male cats.

In the wild, feral cats don't often talk with each other except for things like fighting and mating. The only ones who communicate regularly with voice are a mom and her kittens. For a time she responds to them and they to her like when she calls them to something she has caught for them. But as they get older she starts to ignore their calls and eventually they learn to quit calling. They did a bit of research into this because it has been noticed that feral cats are often at first very quiet. The consensus now is that cats learn to vocalize with people because they find that people respond to it. Because of this each cat actually develops it's own vocabulary specific to the people it is around. This is why no two cats have exactly the same meaning for their vocalizations. They are all speaking their own language. So essentially you and your cat haven't learned to speak each others language yet. He is speaking with the language of the other person he grew up with.
Some cats talk a lot after they figure out someone is listening. If it appears to them that nobody is paying attention to the vocal talk then they try other things like they would use with another cat and they become more physical.
What has really surprised me is that some of my cats actually have a name for me. When they are looking for me they repeat a specific noise. The one who I noticed it in the most has a call that starts out as a low trill (purring meow) that rises in tone to a certain point and for a specific interval. If it is more urgent that he finds me he extends the time out. He will wander around calling until I answer him with a "I'm here" or a "what"? He also knows my specific name for him and will come running when I call him, calling my name as he responds. I didn't know they did anything like this until I started listening. So he and I have a language, one that he made up and I learned what the meanings are. Many cats are smarter than we think. You need to learn his language in order to talk with him.

I think he misses his furbuddy & his previous family. That is understandable. Of course he grieves & wonders where they are. Can they come over once a week for a visit? Also with the harness training I would give him 2-6 months first to settle in..... then I would start step by step. If I can get my boys to wear costumes for 5 minutes ... you can get him into a harness He sounds great! (As much grief as my punk gives to my other cat ... he would miss him if he was re-homed. I think my other cat still dreams of being an only cat again but I think he would still miss his frenemy. So I'm sure he misses the other cat.) Can they let you have or borrow a blanket with all the families smell on it?

I wonder if he is complaining because he felt uncomfortable or over whelmed by the company yesterday. Did he ever interact with any of your company yesterday? One of my cats is very bonded to my hubby but when one of my hubby's friends visited Apollo was hanging out and sleeping on him. He formed a bond with him very quickly and was crying after hubby's friend left. He has never done that before. He can be very vocal when my hubby is out of town. It is almost like he is looking for him. Have you tried to distract him with play time? I found this to be helpful with Apollo. My suggestion would be to try engaging him in play to see if this helps settle him down. You could also try sitting on the floor talking to him or reading to him. This may help if he is scared of something. He could also just be confused if this is the first time you have left him alone for any length of time. Could you try laying down and watch tv to see if he will come cuddle with you on his own. My Apollo can be very vocal and his complaining meow is very loud and very distinct. The only other thing I can think of is to check and make sure there is not a small empty spot in his food bowl. My Apollo has a very distinct loud meow if he can see any part of the bottom of his food bowl. I have found that shaking the bowl will help with this issue. His meow for this is so loud and distinct that my cat sitter who is a good friend went and shook his bowl for him one time when I was in the bathroom.

Bruce is very vocal and can drive us crazy sometimes. The meowing you describe reminds me of what Bruce does when he is bored. He will demand to be entertained and will not stop until we do.

As he used to have a kitty companion before, he was probably used to more play time then he gets now.

Have you tried playing with him?

maggiedemi said:

Hi. You said dry food with pate from time to time. So he's not getting canned food every day? I would try that and see if it helps. Wet food is very important for male cats.

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I was thinking about getting him some. I read that it was important for cats to have wet food. Mine drinks a lot of water so even though he's always hydrated, he must be compensating for the fact that the food is dry so that can't be good..
I'm definitely going to buy him some canned food, but I'm still new to this. Do you have any feeding tips you could give me? I got used to seeing my Mum just fill the bowl when it was empty, but I've noticed some people only feed their cats at certain times? I don't know if it's fair to leave them hungry and waiting. I'd rather he just eat when he's hungry.
Could I give him a mix of dry and canned food? How would I go about doing that? Thank you so much for your advice. He's much better now and seems very happy. He's getting used to everything more and more ^^

Thank you so much to everyone for your advice! It's so reassuring to see so many kind and helpful messages.
He's doing much better now (His last owners named him Pompon, but he has yet to be chipped, so I'm waiting to give him a different name! I want something that really fits him ^^. So for now, I shall call him Kitteh)
Kitteh is doing much better and is more confident. He cuddles with us on the sofa, likes to watch T.V. (I worry about his eyes. But then again I worry about everything...) He's lovely. Still seems very healthy and has stopped sulking!
I bought him a collar (Ancol, which is apparently a good brand). It's fully elasticated with reflective fabric woven into it. I'm waiting for a light tag to arrive as well.

But, um... Now I'm hearing that elastic collars are dangerous. I've fitted it properly (two finger rule), and he's taken to it very well. He tried biting it at first (well, straining his head back and licking it) and he couldn't reach it, so that's reassuring. He doesn't seem bothered now. But I don't know? What do you think? I know the breakaway collars are recommended, but I've heard of cats choking on them because they can't get them to open!

Argh... Help

You could still leave the dry food down all the time if you want and give 1/4 cup canned food twice a day, once in the morning and once at night. My cats each get about 1/2 cup canned food and 3/8 cup (1/8 cup 3 times) dry food per day. I take all that and split it into 2 meals. So this is what they get EACH per day, dry and wet food on separate plates:
7am- 1/4 cup Friskies Shreds canned food and 1/8 cup plus 1 Tablespoon dry food
7pm- 1/4 cup Friskies Shreds canned food and 1/8 cup plus 1 Tablespoon dry food
I'm not sure about the collar, I've always heard that breakaway collars are best. He's really cute! I prefer people names for my cats.

Livak said:

I believe cats sulk; Shinobi has one particular chair he only sits on when he’s been stopped doing something (like not being allowed to live in the dishwasher). He can see everything from the chair and pretends to sleep and watches and has such look of “I am the most deprived cat in the whole world, why can’t I live amongst the plates” . If we really rub him he turns his head away.
After about half an hour he slinks over to sit by the fire and near us and Dodger, and climbs on top of us for purrs and biscuit making. He’s after getting so big it’s hard to remember he’s a kid testing boundaries and reactions.

Since you mentioned the litter box, Shin has only lately stopped reprimanding us for cleaning his litter box, he used to mew like we were the worst people on earth and run around the box. Now he sits like a loaf of bread and watches like “you’re welcome, that was some good poop, huh?”.

Over a week is no time for your kitty to learn you guys and for him to learn ye. He might be missing playing with another cat a lot too so maybe a playing routine might get him more used to the fact his new humans are fun and lovely.

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Your cat sounds like a right character! xD That made me laugh. I've been playing with him a lot lately and now he meows when he wants to play. He's taken a particular liking to a Hamtaro plushie I threw at him once. He picks it up in his mouth, then runs away with it like he's just made the best kill ever.

Well dry food is kinda the frosted flakes of the pet world. They spray fat onto the outside of the dry food pellet so cats will eat it. If I had to do it over again I would have my boys on wet food twice a day with one dry food meal. I now have 2 dry food junkies I try to get to eat 1/4 of a large can of wet food each, every day. They nibble but love the dry food. Now days they make feeders that will open when the timer goes off so you need not worry about your cat starving. Plan on them eating 3-4 times a day. My boys nibble all day long. However once you give little kids free reign to eat frosted flakes it is difficult to get them to eat that healthy omelette. Also one of my cats is a bully. So multiple food bowls make it so all cats have access all the time.

As for water, I would just buy them a water fountain. I just ordered my water loving cat a replacement fountain for 30$. I give my boys 2 water bowls. One bowl by the bathroom sink gets new water 3-5 times a day & the big water bowl once a day. Some cats prefer bottled water over tap.

Drinkwell 360 Pet Fountain

Kitteh is a cutie pie. Glad to see he's settling into his new home.

We have 6 cats on our 10 acres & all have distinct meows. When kittens become cats they generally only vocalize to humans and not other cats however our clowder talk to each other a lot. Often calling one another. Anyhow all cats I've known had varied meows. One we have now has 2 very different meows.
As for your friends visiting when I was married we had people over & my cat hid under the table them got to a point she wouldn't come out & I had to have her go back home to my parents. When you are going to have people over I'd recommend a safe room that no one will go into