Pet Peeves

kkoerner · Sep 3, 2016

Chewing loudly, with mouth open...

Parents who let their kids be disrespectful to others.

Being asked to "borrow" something that cannot be borrowed...like a piece of paper or a piece of tape. Am I getting it back? No...the you aren't borrowing. You can have a piece....but you can't borrow it.

Being honked at when we are all sitting in the same, not moving, parking lot of a freeway... I can't go, you can't go, don't honk.

Not getting napkins with my order at a fast food drive through.

clmgordon · Sep 3, 2016

When someone says supposABLY instead of supposEDLY.

When I'm driving a stick-shift vehicle and the stop light is on a steep hill and the car behind pulls right up to my bumper, leaving only about 2 inches.

People who don't care about taking care of our beautiful planet.

oldgloryrags88 · Sep 3, 2016

KKoerner said:
I agree with this for the most part...but I do want to point out a couple of things.

1. There are many GREAT African American actors, that are not always playing the villian. Nown, if we went back years ago, this wouldn't be the case...but if we live in the present and not the past then that's what we should focus on. Same goes for positions of power and successful careers. It would be silly to say that a black child in today's world is growing up not seeing this.... depending on their family situation this may be all they are raised to know. On the other hand, those in severe poverty may never see these role models. Same could be said for anyone in severe poverty though.

2. If we consider the list you posted of "privileged" groups, then a African American woman has the ability to check off ALL except TWO of those boxes...an African American male has the ability to check off ALL but ONE of them. Both situations would make them "highly privileged" in the scenario....and I know several people who fit that exact scenario...but they still say they are proud of their race. Now, some of these people were BORN into a privileged family. Some weren't. For those A.A. males, born to a privileged family, therefore didn't earn privilege, and would be considered highly privileged according to what you posted....would saying they are proud of their race not be sort of the same as a white person doing so? What if the white person couod only check a few boxes...maybe even only 1 or 2? What if they can check many but came from severe poverty and worked hard to check those boxes off? I get what you are trying to say...but it just really isn't all or nothing here. Or...black or white.

I don't think white people should be walking around protesting black pride. I don't think they should be shouting white pride....because that obviously brings up other issues unrelated to just being proud of who you are.
but I really don't think ANY race should be shouting ______ pride. Because being proud of your race doesn't make sense. Be proud to be who you are (which in a black person's case should include BLACK, white person's should include WHITE) because NO ONE should be ashamed of who or what they are unless they are choosing to do something WRONG. And race/color can't be wrong. All should be proud of where we make it to in life as long as we try our best.
I get what black pride is SUPPOSED to mean and if it really meant that, I agree. But it should instead be...I'm strong, I'm proud of who I am and can be, I WILL NOT be ashamed or made to feel that way because of my skin color...money made...were I live...etc. And this even goes for skin TONE, because darker gets made fun of by other blacks, too light gets made fun of too. It's insane.

We look at animals, cats for instance, and we love all the different body types, colors, eye colors, "hairstyles" vocal abilities, athletic abilities....but we turn around and look at our own species...HUMAN....and we are disgusted by the exact same thing we love about animals? That is just incredibly stupid. I think it's amazing how we are all so different but....the same....

Yes. Thank you! That is exactly what I was trying to say.

oldgloryrags88 · Sep 3, 2016

Willowy said:
No, this isn't true at all. You can have all the determination and drive in the world, but if someone won't hire you/promote you/trust you because of their prejudices, you aren't going to get anywhere. I know people who work much harder than I do, work 3 jobs, and still can't get by because they have never been given the opportunity at a job that pays more than minimum wage. Without the privilege of being able to fall back on family I wouldn't own a house, without the privilege of growing up in a middle-class home I wouldn't have the knowledge or opportunity to have gotten a good job, etc. Privilege is hard to see in your own life .

For instance, if you had grown up in a situation where, at age 13, you had to get a job at a fast-food place to feed your siblings, try to keep your grades up, and take care of an ill parent, you would not have had an opportunity to get your high-paying job. If you were not white, maybe people would have looked at you and said "she can't do this" and they would not have trusted you with the job.

In other words, if you actually believe anybody can get the job you have, hook us all up . Truth is, you got lucky at some point. You knew someone or stumbled into an opportunity. Your parents made choices for you that led to that point. You had the free time and knowledge to be able to pursue it at such a young age. Those are not things everybody is privileged to have.

And, yes, misophonia. I'd have to say that misophonia is one of my pet peeves . OK, I know people can't help their neurological oddities but they CAN control how they conduct themselves around other people. Having the misfortune to grow up with a parent who has misophonia, I just want to say---get some earplugs and don't make other people's lives miserable because of your issues. There is nothing worse than trying to innocently eat a meal and having someone freak out every time your fork touches the plate.

I think it is terrible that your color has to affect whatever or not you are trusted or get employed. That must be very hard and yes, you're right about it being easier to get a job (usually) if you're white. So yes, I agree that your color alone is a big privilege. With that said though, I meant my job is highly unlikely to be based on privilege; growing up, I had people that told me every single day that I am worth nothing and won't succeed, my parents were divorced, alcoholics and my father had severe depression and had to actually be hospitalized for weeks. That was a nightmare. Growing up some, I started a blog to get away from that stress and being depressed. Got a job for my good writing skills. I never knew it'd make me $50 an hour. That was pure luck and I am so proud of myself for having the determination to go on through that nightmare and to make myself worthy when all I was ever told was that I was worthless and will not go far. That is why I am proud of myself. That is luck.

I am still proud to be a American in a decent country and no longer in that nightmare. I am simply proud of all of my ancestors that fought and died for my country and for getting out of slavery (not just for the whites but for the blacks too). I have nothing against anyone who isn't white. I believe there is nothing wrong with being proud of yourself. I encourage it for anyone.

That's what I meant.

handsome kitty · Sep 3, 2016

DreamerRose said:
The ampersand is used only in the name of companies, for instance, Smith & Sons or Joss & Main. It should be spelled out in all other cases.

I could go on and on about grammar and spelling peeves. "Cannot" is one word. It's "sneaked," not "snuck." It's "between you and me," not "between you and I." In the US, commas and periods are placed inside quotes, and that goes for Wikipedia, too, which is egregious in its British usage of placing them outside. Then there are the homonyms. People, especially on the Internet, confuse "reign" and "rein," "bread" and "bred," and dozens more.

I hate the buzzwords that fill campaign coverage: pivot, surrogate, campaign cycle. "Pivot" has been used so often it's lost its meaning.

I have a question. Why do writers use leaped instead of leapt? When I read these lines in my head I substitute leapt because that sounds correct to me. The spell checker doesn't recognize the spelling. Hmmm maybe that's my answer. It is in the Scrabble Dictionary so it must be a word.

Personally I am a little offended by being called 'White' All those boxes and my only choice is 'White'! I am Irish. I am not Polish or Italian or German or Russian or French or even English. I am proud to be Irish. It is my heritage and my culture. My grandparents and great grandparents worked hard to settle in the states. They weren't treated well and had to take jobs no one else wanted that did not pay well.

Living in California now and I can't even get McDonald's to call me for a job interview. 'White' people are a minority here. Don't speak two languages - need not apply. One person in an employment agency looked at me and said you would have to work with minorities on the assembly line and totally dismissed me as a prospective employee because I made an effort to dress nicely for the interview. I have worked side by side with minorities on assembly lines and in a bank with no problems in the past. I look at how a person acts and works. It doesn't matter what color your skin is; jerks come in all colors.

BTW When i make an 'L' to figure out left and right, half the time I get it wrong. I transpose numbers too.

-_aj_- · Sep 3, 2016

My biggest pet hates are

People not indicating, they are put on your car for a reason.

People sitting doing 50mph in a 70

And loud eaters, there is just no need!

oldgloryrags88 · Sep 3, 2016

I can't answer that question for you, but I too have almost always used 'leapt' too.

I have Irish in my blood line too.

I'm sorry you're not being treated fairly at work. That is totally unfair! I hate it when people devalue others for no good reason.

If you hold up your left hand making a 'L' that is a L to you and always will be. Your right hand makes a backwards L but isn't a correct L if you're the one holding up the hand. One of my closest friends is American - Vietnamese and confuses English a lot. She wasn't born here in America, so first language obviously wasn't English. You'll learn.

Anne · Sep 4, 2016

Those of you who addressed race/nationality related issues, let's please keep these topics in the IMO forum? They're perfectly ok to debate in the IMO forum, just not here. I'm not sure this qualifies as a pet peeve even (hardly a minor issue...)

. Thanks!

My pet peeve is when something you need is packaged in a way that takes you forever to unwrap. I used to have an iPhone and I think the thing I remember the most about it was the struggle to get it out of its original packaging. I thought we were going to have to use a chainsaw at some point.

LTS3 · Sep 4, 2016

When I'm in the crosswalk (one of those randomly in the middle of the street without traffic lights) after checking both ways and cars come zipping around the bend or the side street and see me crossing but don't slow down or stop

Or cars on one side will stop for me but the cars on the other side won't. Once a car stopepd to let me cross and as I was crossing another car came up right behind and tried to go around the left side and nearly hit me

People who barge onto public transportation without waiting for people to exit first.

People who push their way to the front of the line to get onto public transportation first and hold up the entire line because they pay with cash (worse is inserting coins one by one into the little slot

) or have to refill their transit card with more money (with coins

).

Parents / baby sitters / caregivers / etc who change their kid's diaper.... on public transportation that is crammed packed with people

Parents / baby sitters / caregivers / etc who feel entitled to place their SUV strollers in the space reserved for handicapped and elderly people on public transportation and refuse to move if someone who needs those seats gets on even if there is plenty of space elsewhere in the bus or train.

Noisy eaters and people who burp loudly in the middle of talking.

Leaving the toilet lid up.

kkoerner · Sep 5, 2016

Anne said:
Those of you who addressed race/nationality related issues, let's please keep these topics in the IMO forum? They're perfectly ok to debate in the IMO forum, just not here. I'm not sure this qualifies as a pet peeve even (hardly a minor issue...) :catguy: . Thanks!

My pet peeve is when something you need is packaged in a way that takes you forever to unwrap. I used to have an iPhone and I think the thing I remember the most about it was the struggle to get it out of its original packaging. I thought we were going to have to use a chainsaw at some point. :wife:

Oh my gosh, or TOYS that are packaged with a million twist ties, or even worse have those plastic things that go inside them like that hold tags on cloths and then they get stuck and the toy has a little pokey thing.

debbila · Sep 5, 2016

People who answer a call or text on their cell phone when they are spending time with me. A friend left after eating Christmas dinner at another friend's house without so much as a goodbye to me. I was told her boyfriend asked her in a text to go to a movie, and she left. That's so inconsiderate. Wonder what these people would do without being available all the time by cell phone?

Making plans with someone and they cancel at the last minute when it's time to go or meet you.

Kids who run around inside or outside of public places because their parents aren't making sure they stay with them. I saw a little boy ( looked younger than 10 ), driving a mobile cart for handicapped customers, around in circles on the parking lot; His mother just stood there taking pictures with her cell phone!

posiepurrs · Sep 5, 2016

I feel it is rude to talk on or answer your cell phone when you are making a purchase in a store. I especially dislike the ones who hold their finger up at you like they are saying 'Wait a minute while I talk to someone more important than you.'

Toll takers who chat while the line builds up behind the car they are waiting on.

Parents who do not make their children behave in a public place. I know a kid can have a bad day (I raised 3 kids) but letting them run around like wild things is not the way to go.

People who feel entitled.

People who make you wonder how they managed to live so long being so stupid - natural selection evidently doesn't always work!

Winchester · Sep 5, 2016

Trying to talk to somebody about something important while they're texting (my boss does this a lot and it makes me crazy; if I were to do that to him, he'd hammer me so fast). I'll be talking to him about a project and, if he gets a text, he'll answer it right away. A couple of times, I've just stopped in mid-sentence, turned around and walked away. It's not worth it.

When we go out to lunch and see somebody who's taking their parent out to lunch. Only to sit there the entire time on her cell phone, yakking away, while the parent just sit there and eats her meal. It breaks my heart because I'm sure the parent would love to talk to her daughter.

School bus drivers and the parents who simply must talk to them NOW. There's a whole line of cars waiting to drive by the bus and there the driver is, talking to Helicopter Mom and the bus lights are flashing. And there we sit. Waiting. And waiting. Until somebody (usually me) blows the horn. It's annoying.

Waiting in the doctor's office. What, you think my time isn't important? Really?

Parents, kindly keep your kids under control while shopping. Or leave the store. The choice is up to you. And it's really not that difficult to make.

micknsnicks2mom · Sep 5, 2016

my biggest pet peeve is the doctor's office. i rarely see the doctor these days, simply because i always (always) sit in the waiting room for well over one hour past my appointment time, then sit another 10-15 minutes in the exam room, until the doctor saunters in. the doctor only gives the allotted 10-15 minutes of appointment time, most of which is spent trying to figure out how to enter into the computer this/that/the other and then goes through the 'must hurry, have so many patients still to see' thing, and hustles out of the room.

okay. #1, my time is valuable too (as @Winchester said). #2, if the doctor is always running that late, why don't i just come in an hour after my appointment time -- i still won't be late to actually see the doctor. #3, i don't want the doctor telling me to be quiet while s/he tries to figure out how to enter something into the computer, not during my measly 10-15 minute appointment time. #4, don't even dare to tell me about dentists being (the doctor's) pet peeve -- i swear i almost made a 'crack' about the 'hippocrite oath'. #5, the fee ($89.19 per visit) just because the doctor is affiliated with a hospital -- and all the doctors are. and, #6, that i have to pay for this doctor's appointment, complete with all of the above.

i'm not even going to go into the doctor having the office call and tell me that the doctor wants tests (no info on what tests) run before my appointment. no discussion of what tests or why they need to be done allowed, both via the phone and at the doctor appointment.

denice · Sep 5, 2016

People who allow their children to run wild and treating people with disrespect is a big one for me. I know that children will be children, I raised three, but parents are supposed to correct or at least attempt to correct the behavior. I see so many parents that seem to be just oblivious to the behavior.

I guess I have a tendency to give physicians a pass. I know it is frustrating but it isn't all the doctor's being money hungry or not caring. There is a growing shortage of Primary Care Physicians in the U.S. To survive they have had to join networks and those networks have put I think unrealistic requirements on them as far as how many patients they see. It is actually turning into assembly line medicine. Sad and I believe it leads to mistakes that wouldn't otherwise have happened but it isn't all the physician's fault, it is the system of health care delivery in this country.

LTS3 · Sep 5, 2016

Debbila said:
People who answer a call or text on their cell phone when they are spending time with me.

That's definitely annoying

And sometimes if it's a phone call, the person will answer and say "I'm busy so I'll call you back" or something like that. Really??? If you're busy, why even bother to answer the phone in the first place?? Just let the call go to voicemail and deal with it later.

Texts don't need to be looked at or responded within a nanosecond, IMO.

Debbila said:
Making plans with someone and they cancel at the last minute when it's time to go or meet you.

I've had that done to me before and it's so annoying

One time it turned out that the people I was supposed to meet up with to do an event met up by themselves anyways. One person called me and said that no one could go because they didn't realize that the event started at noon and they all had plans then. You knew about this event for month, had all the event info with start and end times and other info, and still didn't realize what time it started? Really?? I heard about this later from a co-worker who knew one of those peple. She said that they had fun at the event and asked why I didn't go with them. I was kind of hurt by those people

Winchester said:
Trying to talk to somebody about something important while they're texting (my boss does this a lot and it makes me crazy; if I were to do that to him, he'd hammer me so fast). I'll be talking to him about a project and, if he gets a text, he'll answer it right away. A couple of times, I've just stopped in mid-sentence, turned around and walked away. It's not worth it.

It's disrespectful to do that in any form. I met with my previous supervisor to discuss something work-related and someone walked in to use the printer. The supervisor let her walk in. So she sits down with her laptop and starts editing her document (not just hit the Print button) and talks about her Uber ride that morning and then the latest episode of The Bachelor. Since my supervisor is a huge fan of that tvshow, he starts talking about the latest twist in the show and really got into the discussion. Meanwhile I'm still in the room completely ignored. I waited a few minutes to see if they would wrap up their side converstation but they didn't. So I left the room, feeling that I just wasted my time trying to have a work related discussion that cearly wasn't important as a reality tv dating show or Uber rides. There was no apology from either the supervisor or the other person for interrupting the discussion I was trying to have. The supervisor and I never did finish the discussion.

micknsnicks2mom · Sep 5, 2016

Denice said:
People who allow their children to run wild and treating people with disrespect is a big one for me. I know that children will be children, I raised three, but parents are supposed to correct or at least attempt to correct the behavior. I see so many parents that seem to be just oblivious to the behavior.

I guess I have a tendency to give physicians a pass. I know it is frustrating but it isn't all the doctor's being money hungry or not caring. There is a growing shortage of Primary Care Physicians in the U.S. To survive they have had to join networks and those networks have put I think unrealistic requirements on them as far as how many patients they see. It is actually turning into assembly line medicine. Sad and I believe it leads to mistakes that wouldn't otherwise have happened but it isn't all the physician's fault, it is the system of health care delivery in this country.

i agree. however, i find the way things are handled with doctor's unacceptable. i try to be polite, but am firm in not accepting these things -- and will let them (doctor's, their staff) know this.

AbbysMom · Sep 5, 2016

Do we have a character limit on posts here? :think:

I could go on forever. :lol3:

-Poison Ivy

- heat and humidity

- mosquitoes

I'll stop there for now.

Willowy · Sep 5, 2016

Eh, as far as parents controlling their children---as someone who was TOO controlled, now I don't feel comfortable using a public space. I alway feel very self-conscious, as though I have no right to be there. I guess I would rather the kids grow up feeling comfortable in public spaces, even if that's annoying to me, than to grow up feeling like I do. Cuz it kinda sucks

.

There's probably a happy medium though. I like to see kids running (if not crowded), skipping, singing (and even screaming, sometimes life is too much for a developing brain and I hope they can feel safe expressing even negative emotions) in a store because I wish I felt comfortable doing that. Of course if they're pushing people or pulling things off shelves, that's not acceptable. I hate to see a small child walking quietly next to their parent, it's very sad for me. They should be happy, chatting, singing, skipping.

So, to keep it on-topic, lol---pet peeve: people who control their children excessively and shame/punish all emotional expression so that they grow up with issues.

Primula · Sep 5, 2016

profdanglais said:
If you are:

white
male
straight
cisgender
abled
free from mental illness
free from chronic illness
university educated
a native English speaker
living in a developed country
gainfully employed
sheltered from the elements

then you are a member of a privileged group. If you can tick more than one of those boxes you are highly privileged and if you can tick all of them you are among the most privileged people in the world.

I think two of my brothers in England would be rather surprised that they are "the most privileged people in the world".

Pet Peeves

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Site Owner

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In the kitchen with my cookies

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At Abby's beck and call

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