Want to move but would have to leave feral

leeann77

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Long story short- I’ve been taking care of ferals in my woods for 9 years now, one of them lives with me now. I’m down to just one feral, Ellie, I think she’s related to my cat. Ellie doesn’t come in the summer so I was able to pick up all of the food. Last summer got really bad with the raccoons coming up to my front porch and my neighbor was getting mad.
Ellie only comes in the winter when it gets bad out, so I’m only putting down food when there’s snow on the ground. But now I want to move very badly for many reasons- esp because my cat runs all over the yards of at least 4 houses and eventually something bad is going to happen to her. We have a ton of cars out front and there’s no way to really fence in my yard. So I want to move somewhere with a safe, fenced in yard. (she’ll never be an indoor only cat, she goes nuts)

But that would mean leaving Ellie. I know she’ll be fine in the summer but I’m not sure about winter. She’s really wild and I can’t get anywhere close to her. I can’t try to make her a barn cat because I did that to another cat last summer and he ran away and I feel awful about it. She has the best chance of surviving in her own territory.
It’s just tearing me up inside and my friends and family are sick of hearing about it. But I can’t live there for another 8 years or something waiting for a feral cat to pass away.
I’m trying to come to terms with having to leave her, I need to think of her more like a raccoon than a pet. She could never be tamed at this point. And I can’t sacrifice my own cat’s safety for a feral. I know you are the only ones that will truly understand how emotionally exhausting this all is. Sometimes I wish I’d never started this, it’s caused me so much stress over the years.

I want to start contacting a realtor but I need to come to grips with the Ellie situation first. Thanks for listening. ❤🥲
 

Furballsmom

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Hi
Let me ask this, how does she look? Is she thin and raggedy or is she fairly filled out and having reasonably decent looking fur? If she's looking ok, then she could conceivably continue to be ok.

However, there's something else. You said you can't make your cat an indoor only cat, which means wherever you move to, your resident cat could be facing the exact same issues because a fenced in cat proof yard isn't necessarily that easy to come by.

Why not build a catio that has access into your house through a cat flap or window where you are currently located?
 
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leeann77

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Hi! She looks amazing, she’s not thin and has shiny black fur. I’m 100% sure she’s fine the rest of the year with no supplementing but I worry so much about winter. I wish there was another neighbor near where she lives that I could ask but they are either elderly, renters or have a dog.

I will only buy a place that is already fenced and I found this cool cat fence company that you can modify existing fence with: Outdoor Cat Enclosures | Cat-Proof Fencing | Purrfect Fence

Mine already has a catio with access from the inside. The problem is she‘s been going outside at this house for so long that it would be torture trying to keep her inside, she has such a routine.
(It‘s a long story but the house next to me burned down and I bought the lot to keep someone from building right next to me but it’s WAY too much yard for me to take care of. There wouldn’t be a way to fence it in and connect it to the house)

I really appreciate the brainstorming! I don’t know what to do, I just feel horrible…..
 

Alldara

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Long story short- I’ve been taking care of ferals in my woods for 9 years now, one of them lives with me now. I’m down to just one feral, Ellie, I think she’s related to my cat. Ellie doesn’t come in the summer so I was able to pick up all of the food. Last summer got really bad with the raccoons coming up to my front porch and my neighbor was getting mad.
Ellie only comes in the winter when it gets bad out, so I’m only putting down food when there’s snow on the ground. But now I want to move very badly for many reasons- esp because my cat runs all over the yards of at least 4 houses and eventually something bad is going to happen to her. We have a ton of cars out front and there’s no way to really fence in my yard. So I want to move somewhere with a safe, fenced in yard. (she’ll never be an indoor only cat, she goes nuts)

But that would mean leaving Ellie. I know she’ll be fine in the summer but I’m not sure about winter. She’s really wild and I can’t get anywhere close to her. I can’t try to make her a barn cat because I did that to another cat last summer and he ran away and I feel awful about it. She has the best chance of surviving in her own territory.
It’s just tearing me up inside and my friends and family are sick of hearing about it. But I can’t live there for another 8 years or something waiting for a feral cat to pass away.
I’m trying to come to terms with having to leave her, I need to think of her more like a raccoon than a pet. She could never be tamed at this point. And I can’t sacrifice my own cat’s safety for a feral. I know you are the only ones that will truly understand how emotionally exhausting this all is. Sometimes I wish I’d never started this, it’s caused me so much stress over the years.

I want to start contacting a realtor but I need to come to grips with the Ellie situation first. Thanks for listening. ❤🥲
Hi Leanne.

You can discuss with a realtor finding someone who will also want to take care of Ellie. You get a choice on offers you accept.

I've seen a few videos of people buying houses and inheriting barn cats and the like. Those people are out there.

You could also put some feelers out to local rescues about getting help relocating her to a barn cat colony or something :)
 

4theloveofcats

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I was in this situation with a male feral who wasn't neutered until he was at least 7. Made him stay indoors, attached the best and biggest catio. It took him 6 months and then he got used to it. For several months he was was so butthurt, but eventually he became a happy kitty. He was the best kitty who went from skittish as can be to passing away peacefully on my lap. Much nicer ending than wondering what happened to him.
I would trap Ellie and bring her along.
 

di and bob

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The only solution is to find someone to continue feeding her, either a neighbor or someone who buys your house, Get on Facebook and see if anyone would do it, you could say you could bring them cat food too. DO NOT offer money, too many take it and ignore the cat. I have been through this too and it is heartbreaking. By the time we moved, the cats had died or moved on, I had one that was young and hung around. I trapped him, moved him to an enclosure on the new property and kept him there for 60 days. He was fine for several months and then the harvest crews came in and scared him away, that is what I want to think anyway. He spent a lot of time in the fields. There is a dairy farm a mile away with a lot of cats, I pray he is there. So no matter what you do you can't keep them safe. I would pray for someone to buy your home that loves cats and would agree to set food out during the winter. The fact she never brought kittens around makes me think she may be someone's cat and is spayed. You might try to get a picture of her and see if she is. Good luck in whatever you decide, I truly hope you the best......
 

poolcat

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... I wish there was another neighbor near where she lives that I could ask but they are either elderly, renters or have a dog.
It make sense not to ask someone who rents or has a dog, but I wouldn't write off anyone simply because they're elderly. It's older folks who may have the time to care for an animal, and IMO they could be more consistent about putting food out regularly. And as someone else mentioned, you could offer to provide the food.
 
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leeann77

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Wow, I can’t thank you all enough for the help! I’ve been thinking all day. Neko that article was super helpful! It pretty much confirmed what I believe about her. She’s the most feral cat I’ve seen around- most of them over the years get into a routine where they sit down there and wait for me to bring breakfast but I could never pet them. I did find homes for 3 of them- the youngest that could still be tamed and a friendly one that someone else had actually TNR’d. I still think about the male that I tried to make into a barn cat last summer because they think he ran away. I would never try to interfere and move a cat again. 🥲
The article seemed to agree with me that they have a better chance in their own territory. She was the first feral I had ever TNR’d about 9 years ago so luckily no kittens! Not sure she would fall for a trap again since she’s been in one before.

I hope you all don’t think I’m some kind of monster for considering leaving- I have shed so many tears and spent so much money and time caring for at least 10 cats coming and going over the years. It is just heartbreaking. One had gotten hit by a car and I had to trap him to have him put down. I will take all of your advice to heart- thank you! ❤
Lee Ann
 

tarasgirl06

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Hi! She looks amazing, she’s not thin and has shiny black fur. I’m 100% sure she’s fine the rest of the year with no supplementing but I worry so much about winter. I wish there was another neighbor near where she lives that I could ask but they are either elderly, renters or have a dog.

I will only buy a place that is already fenced and I found this cool cat fence company that you can modify existing fence with: Outdoor Cat Enclosures | Cat-Proof Fencing | Purrfect Fence

Mine already has a catio with access from the inside. The problem is she‘s been going outside at this house for so long that it would be torture trying to keep her inside, she has such a routine.
(It‘s a long story but the house next to me burned down and I bought the lot to keep someone from building right next to me but it’s WAY too much yard for me to take care of. There wouldn’t be a way to fence it in and connect it to the house)

I really appreciate the brainstorming! I don’t know what to do, I just feel horrible…..
Hello leeann77 leeann77 ! You might be able to fence just a small part of your property, not all of it, for Ellie. And I would never say never about her adapting to being indoors, especially if "indoors" includes a catio. A good, cat-fenced catio and access to a house or at least a garage or outbuilding could be the answer!
When we sold our hectare (2.5 acres) and home in the Mojave, there were feral cats there whom we had been feeding. The buyers of the house had cats of their own and agreed to feed the ferals. (LONG story involving my divorce and having to move to city with quotas, over the limit. All of my cats were indoor/only or in a barn and secured cat-fenced barn compound; these were former "community cats" including a semi-feral matriarch and a couple of generations of her progeny. We worked for years to gain their trust and get them neutered/vetted. I had to find safe haven for these cats.)
Many buyers are willing to care for cats who come with house; of course you'd have to check them out and make sure they are good people. Having cats of their own and caring well for them would be a sure indicator that they are.
The article NekoM NekoM Shared is good. Truly feral cats hunt prey and the last thing they want is human contact, so they are generally invisible in neighborhoods, only coming out when humans are not present. Cats are crepuscular -- they are most active at dawn and dusk, when their natural prey, small rodents, are foraging.
One of the "community cats" we were able to get spayed and vetted tried so hard to escape the compound that we were afraid she would do herself harm. After talking to a couple of experts, we sadly made the decision to return her to our former neighborhood, where at least 2 families fed outdoor cats, on the advice of these experts. We missed her terribly and hoped she was able to live as before in her familiar territory.
 

CodyMolly

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Hi, I own ferals and brought them inside I had one feral that would hiss spit bite me but I couldn’t leave her outdoor because it got really cold she wouldn’t survive the weather and lots of coycotes and foxes started coming due to a development building near my area. With that said I trapped her in a havahart trap she shook the trap and wanted out. But I knew it was not going to just leave her and she knew I was the one that fed her and I was called her home. So I understand your heart ache. I named her foxy she certainly was a fox. I brought her inside downstairs in a three level cage like the veterinarian does I kept her in there for a month to get used to me she actually hiss and spit every time I changed her litter. She was tough to say the least . But she was warm and safe and out of the woods. I thought like you she wouldn’t adapt. But I was wrong . Lots of my patience and care of days talking to her even if she was fresh. Lol. Eventually she came around I have her 14 years and she sleeps in my stomach now with her chin on my chest. From going from a crazy cat to a love bug. Took a few years to have her love but in the end all worth it. She loves my dogs too. And a great mouser! I suggest you bring her in don’t worry about her wanting out you can put her in your bedroom with lots of cat stuff -cat beds cat condos and trust me she will calm down they All do. Or .. they have these beautiful cat houses build for outside cats like a dollhouse for kids not expensive made just for outside cats like 8 feet wide or smaller so you can put that in your yard lots of rescues have that and cats love it because they have the feel of the outside. I honestly wouldn’t leave her there. I know you don’t know what to do. But believe me I would bring her inside. I have 7 cats All lived outside… some adopted at 12 and 14 years old and lived outside . Now I brought them in and they live in my sun porch and walk in my house whenever they want. And now after one year bye bye sunroom… living room couch they sleep at. So well adapted. And litter trained too! I bought Cat Attract and put it in the litter and the next day the strays were trained instantly. Anyway sorry your heart’s breaking but try to bring her with you - seems like you Love her so much too. You’ll feel better with yourself too. Again there are outside cat pens and or you can do what I did buy a cage let her get used to you and foxy walked out of the cage when she felt comfortable. If you need some guidance - message me privately
 

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I moved 5 years ago and brought 3 feral cats with me. They were 8, 6, and 5 years old. There was no way I could ever leave them. I worked hard for 8 weeks to get them used to eating in cat carriers. I had a room ready for them that was completely empty but I brought in some of their outside things too. I was able to get all 3 of them. One of them adjusted right away. The other two took quite some time. But I could have never left them. They depended on food from me. There were coyotes in my yard and I kept them warm in the winter with heated cat houses.

I was able to secure a mobile vet to come to the house to give them vaccines and test for FIV and FELV. I had 3 other cats so I needed the cats healthy. They were all good to go. The vet visit was hard on the most feral and sedation was needed, but it was a necessary part.

We moved an hour away. I had a wonderful space for them in a heated sun room that was right off the main living space. It had windows all around so lots of light and lots of wildlife to watch. We had planned on building a catio off the sliding door, but they adjusted so well the catio was not needed.

It took time and patience. I also had a dog. Yet I could go to sleep every night and know they were safe. I worked with them daily. Two of them were friendly towards me, but the 3rd always hissed and spit. He took awhile.

Now 5 years later the most feral of them all is the sweetest kitty. He sits on our laps and snuggles with us in bed. He is still spooked easily but he has come so far. The cats have never tried to get outside. They love their space. The sun room is their safe place, but they all do venture out around the house.
 

tarasgirl06

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I moved 5 years ago and brought 3 feral cats with me. They were 8, 6, and 5 years old. There was no way I could ever leave them. I worked hard for 8 weeks to get them used to eating in cat carriers. I had a room ready for them that was completely empty but I brought in some of their outside things too. I was able to get all 3 of them. One of them adjusted right away. The other two took quite some time. But I could have never left them. They depended on food from me. There were coyotes in my yard and I kept them warm in the winter with heated cat houses.

I was able to secure a mobile vet to come to the house to give them vaccines and test for FIV and FELV. I had 3 other cats so I needed the cats healthy. They were all good to go. The vet visit was hard on the most feral and sedation was needed, but it was a necessary part.

We moved an hour away. I had a wonderful space for them in a heated sun room that was right off the main living space. It had windows all around so lots of light and lots of wildlife to watch. We had planned on building a catio off the sliding door, but they adjusted so well the catio was not needed.

It took time and patience. I also had a dog. Yet I could go to sleep every night and know they were safe. I worked with them daily. Two of them were friendly towards me, but the 3rd always hissed and spit. He took awhile.

Now 5 years later the most feral of them all is the sweetest kitty. He sits on our laps and snuggles with us in bed. He is still spooked easily but he has come so far. The cats have never tried to get outside. They love their space. The sun room is their safe place, but they all do venture out around the house.
You are WONDERFUL. TYSM for putting caring into action, and for sharing this inspirational post. *SNORGLES* on your cats!
 
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leeann77

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Those are amazing stories and I’m so happy it worked out for you all! Thank you for taking so much time to write- I still have some thinking to do. ❤
 

tarasgirl06

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Those are amazing stories and I’m so happy it worked out for you all! Thank you for taking so much time to write- I still have some thinking to do. ❤
Very glad you are taking the time to think what the best plan will be. Really hope Ellie will be happy and have a good life (hopefully somehow with you).
 
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