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- Mar 22, 2022
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Hey there, I need some help! I know this is a long read, I want to lay out the details to see if I've missed something, and seek any advice!)
I got a new cat almost 2 months ago and we've had a challenging go of things. My new cat is a fixed male 1 yr old oriental shorthair, and my older cat is a fixed male 13 yr old oriental shorthair. I have desperately wanted a second oriental but my living situation has not allowed it until now. My 13 yr old is a "young" old cat, looking at him you'd never know he was 13. We have stray outside kitties too that he's always been intrigued by, no issues with them so I thought I'd try a second kitty.
I was careful on choosing one I thought would fit in, a breeder posted a very friendly, docile cat who made friends with anyone she put him with. She had him as a breeder cat she was retiring. Unfortunately I don't have oriental shorthairs near me so the only option was to have him flown from the west coast to me. On the flight he broke out of his carrier (apparently that's never happened!) and once we had him he was understandably nervous. Once home, he got his own room that I put calming music/sound machine/new toys/hiding spots/etc. I "catified" his space as best as I could. He was very nervous for the first few days, was friendly to us but also attacked our hands/arms.
My older cat knew something was different but he never growled/hissed/showed any issues.(We've had marking issues with him in the past and I thought for sure we'd deal with that, and surprisingly we haven't!) I put a barrier so they coudln't even play under the door for awhile until I could get the new cat to the vets. I moved onto the scent exchange with rubbing a sock over both and letting them sniff the others, and then moved onto switching blankets. (and during this time the new cat got time out in our house, with my older cat closed in a bedroom) I saw no issues, both were rubbing the sock or disinterested, and both laid on the other's blankets. They were using communal space litter boxes no problem, and I had Feliway plug ins to help.
I moved onto sight after about 3 weeks, and used a tall glass shelf barrier in the door with a blanket draped over the top. They saw each other we gave treats and they honestly were mostly disinterested- just wanted the food. The new cat kept doing all he could to get out and kept jumping the barrier. This wasn't a great set up for them to see each other and I didn't see any issues so I moved onto letting them out together. They sniffed for awhile and my older cat walked away but the new cat would not leave him alone, he chased him, got all up in his face. My older cat was swatting/hissing at first and later meet ups he was growling. I tried toys to distract but the new cat was laser focused. I found a screen you can tape over doorways to allow them to safely see face to face in a better set up. Put it on the new cat's door and my older cat went up and was curious. The new cat hated this set up and did all he could to get out-climbed the screen a few times to escape, tried digging underneath, and was non stop yowling when he was "contained". He would jump at my older cat which of course he didn't like so he tended to not go by the doorway. I tried this for awhile but knew it wasn't a good set up.
I moved the screen to my older cat's door and it worked ok, my older cat was not as incessant to get out and they had some decent sniffs, some growling/hissing by my older cat if the new one was too close or jumping at him. I then started putting a harness on my new cat to allow them a safer meet and greet out in the house. He didn't love it but I was working with training him and he's very smart, was doing better. I saw slight improvement with the cats, my older cat gained some confidence knowing the new one couldn't jump/chase him and seemed content as long as he could walk around and do his things. The new cat would stare and swishy tail at my older cat, sometimes laying on my lap which I thought maybe claiming me? They had a few stare downs, which would turn into growling/hissing by my older cat if I let it go on, but most times I tried splitting them up.
One night after a few really good encounters, my new cat FREAKED out while wearing his harness he was hissing/uncontrollable and bit me hard when I tried to get it off) I'm unsure what set him off, I don't believe it was my other cat as they weren't even close. My new cat DOES have some fears and hasn't fully settled so he is jumpy and I think once realized he was "contained" he freaked out further. The next day he seemed totally fine and thankfully wasn't too upset.
This new cat's history is where its challenging :/ He was bred in Russia and my breeder got him around 6 months old, and I got him just after turning 1. She bred him once and retired him, said he came over with his sister and was fearful for a time when she first had him. But calmed down and fit in well with any of her cats. I've since put together that he is fearful about being contained. I would guess this stems from the Russia transport. He broke out of his cat carrier when being flown here, FLIPPED out in the carrier when we took him to the vet (hissing/rolling/scratching/anything to get out),did not like being closed in with the screen barrier on his door, and now couldn't handle the harness.
I'm just at a loss as I've fallen in love with him and don't want to give up, but I'm not sure what to do. I just am unsure what (if any) other options there are. I do believe they would learn to get on as long as my older cat could get used to him without being chased/followed/etc. But I can't think of any way to contain the newer one without stressing HIM out further.
And I"m not the best at reading body language, I can't decide if this is fear? a Dominance thing? they don't know how to communicate? My older cat would run away always but lately he's seemed a little more "strong" and initiates swatting/hissing/etc. when the new cat was sitting by him. They have stare downs and swishy tails, so maybe this just won't work out :/
Has anyone ever experienced anything like this? or have any insight that I may have missed? I always want to do what's best for my pets and am thinking it's best to find him a new home but wanted to exhaust every option first! Thank you so much for reading through
I got a new cat almost 2 months ago and we've had a challenging go of things. My new cat is a fixed male 1 yr old oriental shorthair, and my older cat is a fixed male 13 yr old oriental shorthair. I have desperately wanted a second oriental but my living situation has not allowed it until now. My 13 yr old is a "young" old cat, looking at him you'd never know he was 13. We have stray outside kitties too that he's always been intrigued by, no issues with them so I thought I'd try a second kitty.
I was careful on choosing one I thought would fit in, a breeder posted a very friendly, docile cat who made friends with anyone she put him with. She had him as a breeder cat she was retiring. Unfortunately I don't have oriental shorthairs near me so the only option was to have him flown from the west coast to me. On the flight he broke out of his carrier (apparently that's never happened!) and once we had him he was understandably nervous. Once home, he got his own room that I put calming music/sound machine/new toys/hiding spots/etc. I "catified" his space as best as I could. He was very nervous for the first few days, was friendly to us but also attacked our hands/arms.
My older cat knew something was different but he never growled/hissed/showed any issues.(We've had marking issues with him in the past and I thought for sure we'd deal with that, and surprisingly we haven't!) I put a barrier so they coudln't even play under the door for awhile until I could get the new cat to the vets. I moved onto the scent exchange with rubbing a sock over both and letting them sniff the others, and then moved onto switching blankets. (and during this time the new cat got time out in our house, with my older cat closed in a bedroom) I saw no issues, both were rubbing the sock or disinterested, and both laid on the other's blankets. They were using communal space litter boxes no problem, and I had Feliway plug ins to help.
I moved onto sight after about 3 weeks, and used a tall glass shelf barrier in the door with a blanket draped over the top. They saw each other we gave treats and they honestly were mostly disinterested- just wanted the food. The new cat kept doing all he could to get out and kept jumping the barrier. This wasn't a great set up for them to see each other and I didn't see any issues so I moved onto letting them out together. They sniffed for awhile and my older cat walked away but the new cat would not leave him alone, he chased him, got all up in his face. My older cat was swatting/hissing at first and later meet ups he was growling. I tried toys to distract but the new cat was laser focused. I found a screen you can tape over doorways to allow them to safely see face to face in a better set up. Put it on the new cat's door and my older cat went up and was curious. The new cat hated this set up and did all he could to get out-climbed the screen a few times to escape, tried digging underneath, and was non stop yowling when he was "contained". He would jump at my older cat which of course he didn't like so he tended to not go by the doorway. I tried this for awhile but knew it wasn't a good set up.
I moved the screen to my older cat's door and it worked ok, my older cat was not as incessant to get out and they had some decent sniffs, some growling/hissing by my older cat if the new one was too close or jumping at him. I then started putting a harness on my new cat to allow them a safer meet and greet out in the house. He didn't love it but I was working with training him and he's very smart, was doing better. I saw slight improvement with the cats, my older cat gained some confidence knowing the new one couldn't jump/chase him and seemed content as long as he could walk around and do his things. The new cat would stare and swishy tail at my older cat, sometimes laying on my lap which I thought maybe claiming me? They had a few stare downs, which would turn into growling/hissing by my older cat if I let it go on, but most times I tried splitting them up.
One night after a few really good encounters, my new cat FREAKED out while wearing his harness he was hissing/uncontrollable and bit me hard when I tried to get it off) I'm unsure what set him off, I don't believe it was my other cat as they weren't even close. My new cat DOES have some fears and hasn't fully settled so he is jumpy and I think once realized he was "contained" he freaked out further. The next day he seemed totally fine and thankfully wasn't too upset.
This new cat's history is where its challenging :/ He was bred in Russia and my breeder got him around 6 months old, and I got him just after turning 1. She bred him once and retired him, said he came over with his sister and was fearful for a time when she first had him. But calmed down and fit in well with any of her cats. I've since put together that he is fearful about being contained. I would guess this stems from the Russia transport. He broke out of his cat carrier when being flown here, FLIPPED out in the carrier when we took him to the vet (hissing/rolling/scratching/anything to get out),did not like being closed in with the screen barrier on his door, and now couldn't handle the harness.
I'm just at a loss as I've fallen in love with him and don't want to give up, but I'm not sure what to do. I just am unsure what (if any) other options there are. I do believe they would learn to get on as long as my older cat could get used to him without being chased/followed/etc. But I can't think of any way to contain the newer one without stressing HIM out further.
And I"m not the best at reading body language, I can't decide if this is fear? a Dominance thing? they don't know how to communicate? My older cat would run away always but lately he's seemed a little more "strong" and initiates swatting/hissing/etc. when the new cat was sitting by him. They have stare downs and swishy tails, so maybe this just won't work out :/
Has anyone ever experienced anything like this? or have any insight that I may have missed? I always want to do what's best for my pets and am thinking it's best to find him a new home but wanted to exhaust every option first! Thank you so much for reading through