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- Mar 14, 2016
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"I think she's probably not scared because she knows she can run to safety if she needs to." - Yes and she is more confident up there.I think she's probably not scared because she knows she can run to safety if she needs to. She's also quite a distance from him and she only seems to get scared when he's closer to her. There are so many reasons it could be, though I don't believe it's something outside. A part of me thinks that she's just accepting that Fluffy exists but doesn't want to be near him or is worried that she's going into his territory.
She is happy and still loves to cuddle and play when he's not around and even when she is upstairs while he is downstairs she doesn't seem stressed for the most part. I think it could possibly be a bit of PTSD that triggers it but I'm unsure. They do stare at eachother but other than that there isn't really any negative body language. Usually Fluffy will be laying down or sitting and purring or meowing or chirping. I think it's all in her mind, or she's just trying to avoid being jumped on.
She has also been always somewhat skittish, but more so as she aged. When she was around a year old she was very curious and playful and very social. Between a year and a half to two years old, she definitely became less of those things and would spend more time alone (this was also around the time I was off work for ten weeks during lockdown #2). When I returned to work was when she started acting differently. She spent more time in her room and she wouldn't let anyone except me and my partner pet her and to this day almost a year later she still won't let my mom pet her. When we first got Fluffy she changed quite a bit and wouldn't even come downstairs. I'd say now she's fairly normal. She still prefers to stay upstairs when he is out and she sleeps up there too, but the rest of the time she goes around freely whenever she pleases. This is basically the same as it was prior to adopting Fluffy.
Right now it's just been trying to decode what is keeping her away from him. It may just be a phase that she's going through. She recently also completely stopped going up on the cat tree out of the blue and only goes up on the window perch now. Fluffy goes on the cat tree sometimes but it's rare and he also goes on the window perch so I'm guessing he's not the issue and her tastes of just changed.
I'll keep it up. I've been doing really good leaving her door open in the morning and evening when Fluffy is out so it's just a matter of getting her to come downstairs now
" She's also quite a distance from him and she only seems to get scared when he's closer to her." - Makes sense
" There are so many reasons it could be, though I don't believe it's something outside." - Ok
" A part of me thinks that she's just accepting that Fluffy exists but doesn't want to be near him or is worried that she's going into his territory." - Ok, if that is "all" it is then that is fine.
"She is happy and still loves to cuddle and play when he's not around and even when she is upstairs while he is downstairs she doesn't seem stressed for the most part." - Great
" I think it could possibly be a bit of PTSD that triggers it but I'm unsure." - Yes, possible.
" They do stare at eachother" - That is common.
" but other than that there isn't really any negative body language. " - Great
"Usually Fluffy will be laying down or sitting and purring or meowing or chirping. " - Ok.
"I think it's all in her mind, or she's just trying to avoid being jumped on." - Could be. If it is the mind meds can help. If it is "being jumped on" confidence will help. I do want to continue building her confidence downstairs.
"She has also been always somewhat skittish, but more so as she aged. When she was around a year old she was very curious and playful and very social. " - Ok
"Between a year and a half to two years old, she definitely became less of those things and would spend more time alone (this was also around the time I was off work for ten weeks during lockdown #2). When I returned to work was when she started acting differently. She spent more time in her room and she wouldn't let anyone except me and my partner pet her and to this day almost a year later she still won't let my mom pet her." - Ok, so you going back to work had some impact. A lack of confidence.
" When we first got Fluffy she changed quite a bit and wouldn't even come downstairs." - Yes, normal.
" I'd say now she's fairly normal." - Wow, that is really good.
" She still prefers to stay upstairs when he is out and she sleeps up there too, but the rest of the time she goes around freely whenever she pleases. This is basically the same as it was prior to adopting Fluffy." - Ok, great
"Right now it's just been trying to decode what is keeping her away from him." - Yes
" It may just be a phase that she's going through." - Maybe
" She recently also completely stopped going up on the cat tree out of the blue and only goes up on the window perch now." - Hmmmmmmm, usually there is a reason.
" Fluffy goes on the cat tree sometimes but it's rare" - Hmmmmmmm
" and he also goes on the window perch" - So it may not be an ownership confidence thing
" so I'm guessing he's not the issue and her tastes of just changed." - Could be. Anything around the cat tree or does it have a different view than the window perch? Outside or inside (to the kitchen).
"I'll keep it up. I've been doing really good leaving her door open in the morning and evening when Fluffy is out so it's just a matter of getting her to come downstairs now " - Great. And make sure you do the tough love. Make her make the choice to take the "risk" for the reward.
We just need to her to get that last bit of confidence and be like "this is my home so behave!!!".