- Joined
- Jan 10, 2022
- Messages
- 14
- Purraise
- 8
Hi everyone! I'm new here. For context, I've always loved animals- cats and dogs especially. I have been wanting a cat for years now, since I was in high school (I've graduated college by now). I moved out semi-recently in the beginning of September Last year and I knew I wanted to have some company since I'd be by myself all day- I had thought about adopting a cat right after moving but I wanted to get used to living by myself for a little while (good choice on my part haha). Now the new year rolled by and I felt prepared to take on my first fur baby. I had never cared for a pet before, but I was well aware of the time commitment and responsibility to decide to take care of any animal.
However when that faithful adoption day came by- nothing had prepared me for that post adoption anxiety spike. This might sound like a broken record, as there were threads describing this before (and i've read a bunch of them), but like all of them, I'm starting to feel incredibly overwhelmed and anxious about everything. I know the "rule of 3s" (Today is day 5) and ironically the anxiety spike happened on day 3 like most people, but its hard to believe things will change when every atom in my body is telling me im doing terribly.
My lil noodle is a 4 month old domestic medium hair, she's very pretty and sweet. I work at home, so I play with her at least 2 times a day for at least 15 minutes- she's super smart, she already knew how to use the litterbox and scratch post I got her. Unfortunately bc of the money did getting all the supplies I don't have much for her other than a small cat tower and a few toys aside from necessities.
I'm so so afraid of being a terrible mom for her, and instilling bad behaviors completely unintentionally. Part of me knows that this is an adjustment period for the both of us (where most people start seeing a bit of change in both themselves and in the kitten at around 3 weeks) but another part of me knows it's better to teach her behavior things as soon as she's able (but maybe now isn't a good time and I should just wait? But I'm afraid if I condone her behavior for things I don't want her to do and then try and 'train' her after a few weeks she might be confused?). In the day she's often skittish and scared/jumpy, which is understandable, it's only barely been 5 days. At night she's super cuddly and kneads/purrs right next to me every night so far. She wakes up on occasion to walk around the bed and fall back asleep, no midnight zoomies. She eats all her meals. I'm just so afraid I'm treating her poorly that I've seriously considered bringing her back, which is breaking my heart. part of me thinks that it'd be better if I got a roommate to raise her with. I know getting a second kitten/bonded pair now is a better idea and the cost isnt much more than having just one (which, now in foresight i feel super irresponsible about now), but I just don't have the home space or mental strength to take a second one on (especially if only one right now is causing me this much emotional distress). I've barely been able to eat or work, and to my own surprise I ended up having a terrible anxiety attack that reduced me to tears yesterday.
So I guess what I'd like to ask here is- did anyone else have any recent similar experiences? What did you do? what did you do to cope and get through those first few weeks? What did you do to discourage bad behavior? (I would never physically hurt my kitten of course. when she bites and nips at my hand and arm I go limp and slowly pull away while saying "no, ouch..!" I am just unsure how to prevent things like going and climbing on unwanted things like my desk or keyboard, or digging through my plant pot. I tried doing the aluminum foil thing but she is surprisingly unaffected by it haha. So the only non-physical thing I could think of was startling her with shaking a bin of coins I have. Though, she has begun to be more aggressive/afraid because of it, so I know now to not do that and have stopped, and I feel terrible about attempting it. There's gotta be some way, I don't want my kitten to hate me but I don't want her to think going on these things is ok either.)
Of course, this has caused me to think of bringing her back, which i absolutely would hate to do and would break my heart. I know she's a very sweet good girl and I love her a lot. I'm terrified of trying to 'discipline' her. She isnt used to being handled yet, and likes to escape when I try to go out to take out the trash. I know I have to be patient but I just don't know what to do. I would be super grateful for some advice and reassurance. Thanks so much.
However when that faithful adoption day came by- nothing had prepared me for that post adoption anxiety spike. This might sound like a broken record, as there were threads describing this before (and i've read a bunch of them), but like all of them, I'm starting to feel incredibly overwhelmed and anxious about everything. I know the "rule of 3s" (Today is day 5) and ironically the anxiety spike happened on day 3 like most people, but its hard to believe things will change when every atom in my body is telling me im doing terribly.
My lil noodle is a 4 month old domestic medium hair, she's very pretty and sweet. I work at home, so I play with her at least 2 times a day for at least 15 minutes- she's super smart, she already knew how to use the litterbox and scratch post I got her. Unfortunately bc of the money did getting all the supplies I don't have much for her other than a small cat tower and a few toys aside from necessities.
I'm so so afraid of being a terrible mom for her, and instilling bad behaviors completely unintentionally. Part of me knows that this is an adjustment period for the both of us (where most people start seeing a bit of change in both themselves and in the kitten at around 3 weeks) but another part of me knows it's better to teach her behavior things as soon as she's able (but maybe now isn't a good time and I should just wait? But I'm afraid if I condone her behavior for things I don't want her to do and then try and 'train' her after a few weeks she might be confused?). In the day she's often skittish and scared/jumpy, which is understandable, it's only barely been 5 days. At night she's super cuddly and kneads/purrs right next to me every night so far. She wakes up on occasion to walk around the bed and fall back asleep, no midnight zoomies. She eats all her meals. I'm just so afraid I'm treating her poorly that I've seriously considered bringing her back, which is breaking my heart. part of me thinks that it'd be better if I got a roommate to raise her with. I know getting a second kitten/bonded pair now is a better idea and the cost isnt much more than having just one (which, now in foresight i feel super irresponsible about now), but I just don't have the home space or mental strength to take a second one on (especially if only one right now is causing me this much emotional distress). I've barely been able to eat or work, and to my own surprise I ended up having a terrible anxiety attack that reduced me to tears yesterday.
So I guess what I'd like to ask here is- did anyone else have any recent similar experiences? What did you do? what did you do to cope and get through those first few weeks? What did you do to discourage bad behavior? (I would never physically hurt my kitten of course. when she bites and nips at my hand and arm I go limp and slowly pull away while saying "no, ouch..!" I am just unsure how to prevent things like going and climbing on unwanted things like my desk or keyboard, or digging through my plant pot. I tried doing the aluminum foil thing but she is surprisingly unaffected by it haha. So the only non-physical thing I could think of was startling her with shaking a bin of coins I have. Though, she has begun to be more aggressive/afraid because of it, so I know now to not do that and have stopped, and I feel terrible about attempting it. There's gotta be some way, I don't want my kitten to hate me but I don't want her to think going on these things is ok either.)
Of course, this has caused me to think of bringing her back, which i absolutely would hate to do and would break my heart. I know she's a very sweet good girl and I love her a lot. I'm terrified of trying to 'discipline' her. She isnt used to being handled yet, and likes to escape when I try to go out to take out the trash. I know I have to be patient but I just don't know what to do. I would be super grateful for some advice and reassurance. Thanks so much.