Question of The Day. Sunday 28th of November

[Norachan]

Here's a question I know I've asked before, but it's always a fun one.

What is your pet peeve?

Mine is people who drop litter. You wouldn't believe the number of people who come here for a nice drive through the national park and think it's OK to leave plastic bottles and food containers behind. Makes my blood boil!

How about you?

 

[Maria Bayote]

Poor customer service especially from an online seller.

Someone who does not know how to close the door after coming in or out.

Loud people at a public transport.

People clapping when the plane lands.

I have a lot in my list.

 

[denice]

Rude inconsiderate people who think they are No 1 and everyone has to give way for them. I don't expect people to be chatty and personable, actually that can be a little annoying, but they can patiently wait their turn like everyone else.

 

[maggiedemi]

People that have no empathy. (My mother)
People on Facebook who threaten to disown you if you vote differently than them. Or call you names.
People who don't shower.
People who hurt children or animals.
The insane price of dental care.

 

[MonaLyssa33]

People who play heavy bass music in their cars, especially if they are sitting outside my house for a long time. I'm sensitive to noises, so it always jars me.
Entitled people
People who stomp up and down stairs
Parents who yell at their kids when their kids are doing something not worth yelling about, or because they are reacting to not knowing how to express their emotions
People who leave their dogs outside to bark for hours
People rude to service workers
Fireworks

 

[strider rose]

people that are disrespectful
rude people
and people that act like assholes

 

[denice]

Parents who yell at their kids when their kids are doing something not worth yelling about, or because they are reacting to not knowing how to express their emotions

I don't like parents yelling at kids under most circumstances. I think the only time it is warranted is when a child is putting themselves in danger like stepping out in a street when a car is coming. It accomplishes nothing positive. A calm but stern no nonsense tone of voice accomplishes much more. Going into a frenzy and screaming just puts the parent at the same level as the child, you can't parent from that level.

 

[susanm9006]

People in long fast food lines who wait until they get to the counter to figure out what they want to eat. Also people who wait in these long lines with children and then let their children (very slowly) try to order their own food. I do understand kids need to learn but not when their are a dozen people behind you.

 

[MoochNNoodles]

People who make noises when they chew.

Judgmental people who are always right think their way is the only way to do something. There's more than one way to eat a Reece's. There's more than one way to exercise/diet/eat/wash your hair/wash your face/raise your kids/have a career/maintain a relationship/etc.

Also people who make reels of themselves dancing around to tell you to do things their way or your an idiot. And the people who record themselves crying or whatever to share on social media. I will never understand that method for seeking attention!

 

[neely]

Since the pandemic my pet peeve is people with road rage, e.g. speeding, cutting you off when you both end up at the stop light anyway or tail gating - get off my bumper, please!

 

[aliceneko]

People who walk right in front of you and don't respect personal space in public!

 

[Willowy]

I always think "pet peeve" is for silly little things that don't bother most people, not simple likes and dislikes, but since the discussion is going this way anyway:

People who are abusive to service workers or anyone, really. Especially if they believe they're above anybody else. For lack of a better term, "Karens" (apologies to nice people named Karen, we really do need a better term).

People who only think about what benefits themselves, and don't care about other people. Not like simple thoughtlessness, but those who are selfish and narcissistic.

People who judge you based on ridiculous stuff like how expensive your clothes are. I would say people who judge by looks in general, but I think everybody judges by looks to some extent and it's probably unavoidable, and might help keep us safe sometimes.

A calm but stern no nonsense tone of voice accomplishes much more.

Expressing displeasure in a "calm but stern" way to a child who is <doing something not worth yelling about, or because they are reacting to not knowing how to express their emotions>, can be just as devastating to the child as yelling or hitting. Kids need help navigating the world, not to be told they're bad and wrong for not knowing stuff yet.

Related to that, it's way beyond a pet peeve, but people who hit kids need to be thrown into a volcano. I don't care what they call it, cutesy names don't matter to me: if you, on purpose, move something forcefully so as to impact a child's body in order to cause pain and/or distress, it's the volcano for ye. Ok, parenting classes after one violation, after that, 3 strikes, it's the volcano. I don't generally care how people raise their kids but I draw a hard line on that one. Hitting people, regardless of their age, is bad, wrong, unloving, unkind, and makes the world a worse place in general. If someone cannot teach children without hitting them, they do not need to be around children.

 

[denice]

Expressing displeasure in a "calm but stern" way to a child who is <doing something not worth yelling about, or because they are reacting to not knowing how to express their emotions>, can be just as devastating to the child as yelling or hitting. Kids need help navigating the world, not to be told they're bad and wrong for not knowing stuff yet.

It isn't always that they don't know. Kids start testing boundaries early and it continues through the rest of their time at home. Boundaries have to be made clear.

 

[Willowy]

It isn't always that they don't know. Kids start testing boundaries early and it continues through the rest of their time at home. Boundaries have to be made clear.

I think this is the important part here:
<doing something not worth yelling about, or because they are reacting to not knowing how to express their emotions>

 

[Elphaba09]

My list is long, but I will try to keep it to just three random ones on the list. They are not necessarily my biggest pet peeves.

Abelists, especially the ones who use disabled people for "inspiration"
People who do not fix their "indoor/outdoor" cats
People who talk on their phones in the movie theater. (When we went to see "Dune" there were three other sets of people in the theatre. One woman decided that she should talk loudly on the phone for more than six minutes. Yes, I started timing her.)

Okay, I will list five. I cannot help it.

Couples who think their wedding party members should alter (or cover up) parts of their bodies to fit the couple's aesthetics
People who are rude to service workers or put down service work in general

 

[Elphaba09]

Related to that, it's way beyond a pet peeve, but people who hit kids need to be thrown into a volcano. I don't care what they call it, cutesy names don't matter to me: if you, on purpose, move something forcefully so as to impact a child's body in order to cause pain and/or distress, it's the volcano for ye. Ok, parenting classes after one violation, after that, 3 strikes, it's the volcano. I don't generally care how people raise their kids but I draw a hard line on that one. Hitting people, regardless of their age, is bad, wrong, unloving, unkind, and makes the world a worse place in general. If someone cannot teach children without hitting them, they do not need to be around children.

100% agree. I lost a friend of mine several years back partially because of this My friend was in her mid/late 20s when I was in my early/mid-30s. Her mother was in her late 40s and had a set of twins. When they were about a year and a half old, she mentioned that her mom spanks the twins. I lost my mind and told her how it was just teaching them fear and to solve problems with violence. She called me a bad mother for not spanking my children. I said, "You have had a strained relationship with your mother since I met you. You are terrified of her. So are your brothers. Now she is setting the course for the twins as well. Do you honestly think that is okay?" (My mother was straight-up abusive, which, in part, led me to marry an abusive man. The only good thing that came from it was the fact that I became very anti-spanking.)

 

[Willowy]

When they were about a year and a half old, she mentioned that her mom spanks the twins.

Double volcano for people who hit babies.

Couples who think their wedding party members should alter (or cover up) parts of their bodies to fit the couple's aesthetics

I'm super cranky about the wedding industrial complex in general, let's call that my pet peeve, lol. But, yeah, I see advice columns about how someone's bridezilla/groomzilla "friend" wants them to cover up a tattoo or dye their hair or lose weight or whatever, and I just wonder WHY they'd even ask them to be in their wedding. I don't get it, especially after they already asked them to be an attendant.

 

[Lari]

I'm sure I will fail many times, but I'm trying to hold space and validate J's feelings while also holding boundaries. Telling her I get she's frustrated I won't let her chew on the electrical cord while not letting her do it. I was not very patient as a teacher, and with her I just want to do so much better.

Anyway, pet peeves. I'm going to go with actual petty peeves rather than deep stuff.

-Restaurant websites that don't have good allergen menus and thus force me to actually call them
-when you choose the shortest line at the grocery store but the person in front of you has an issue that lasts forever and the people in the longer lines get done sooner.
-when you pick against Oklahoma State every week in your college fantasy league but they always win so the one week you give them a vote is the only week they lose.
-baby pajamas with snaps instead of zippers. Seriously, why?

 

[denice]

People, mostly young women, get so wrapped up in their wedding. It's something they have been dreaming about since they were little and they have it built up in their mind. They want it exactly the way they imagined it was going to be which of course isn't possible. I remember years ago reading about the wedding that Joan Collins did for her daughter. It cost a million dollars and was a winter wonderland theme. They divorced less than a year later.

 

[denice]

I'm sure I will fail many times, but I'm trying to hold space and validate J's feelings while also holding boundaries. Telling her I get she's frustrated I won't let her chew on the electrical cord while not letting her do it. I was not very patient as a teacher, and with her I just want to do so much better.

Yes you will fail many times, you are human. Just from the things you have posted here you will continue to be a very good mother. You love her and want what is best for her, you will do just fine.