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calicosrspecial

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Indy would either fall on his side or just flat out lie down with his feet in front. He's stay like that for maybe :30 or so, and then he'd try to make a move for the food again. Shockingly enough, Duncan continued eating through all of it.
I'm going to say that Indy was about 3 feet away, on the other side of my legs doing his flopping.




Maybe in Indy's eyes, but the screeching made me think it wasn't so much play. I don't know.




Not sure - they were on the other side of the bed in a flash, so I could only hear, no see.




I'll try that next time. My main concern was protecting Duncan.




I'm glad you think so. lol




I'll give that a shot this evening.
"Indy would either fall on his side or just flat out lie down with his feet in front." - Did he do any "bunny kicks"? How they do it tells us a lot. So cats do that and it can be very positive (as no cat would expose their belly as they are VERY vulnerable). If I saw it I could tell in a second. What is your take on it?

"He's stay like that for maybe :30 or so" - Wow, that seems pretty good. Positive. Playful.

"and then he'd try to make a move for the food again." - Yep, so almost like a play thing. But again the body language tells us everything.

"Shockingly enough, Duncan continued eating through all of it." - WOW. Ok, THAT tells me Duncan thought it was nothing. REALLY positive.

"I'm going to say that Indy was about 3 feet away, on the other side of my legs doing his flopping." - THAT is great. 3 feet is really close. Good job being a positive association.

"Maybe in Indy's eyes, but the screeching made me think it wasn't so much play. I don't know." - Duncan screeched?

"Not sure - they were on the other side of the bed in a flash, so I could only hear, no see." - Ok. How about when you got to them? Those do tend to linger.

"I'll try that next time. My main concern was protecting Duncan." - Understandable. Indy does not seem to initially want to hurt Duncan BUT it can escalate so it is understandable. Did you notice any fur flying?

How did Indy act after? And what was his body language like when you licked him up?

I would be REALLY surprised if Indy would have intentionally hurt him. I could see Duncan defending himself and hurting Indy and then maybe Indy escalating and hurting Duncan but would be surprised initially if Indy would. BUT we always have to be aware.

"I'm glad you think so. lol " - I sincerely mean that because it sounds like there were no injuries and Duncan rebounded almost immediately which tells me Duncan didn't think it went poorly. AND it was nearly 20 minutes of good stuff which is a long time this early in face to face sessions. Usually the resident cat has teh biggest issue and he seems to be telling us it was fine. So I truly believe that. Of course, if I thought it was not good I would tell you because ignoring issues does not solve anything and only makes things worse.

"I'll give that a shot this evening." - Great. Just keep it positive. Quality or quantity.

I am not at all worried. They will be intro'd successfully. Hard to explain in words but experience just gives a feeling. One just knows. You'll see what I mean shortly.

Keep up the great work.
 

Beyond Confused

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"Indy would either fall on his side or just flat out lie down with his feet in front." - Did he do any "bunny kicks"? How they do it tells us a lot. So cats do that and it can be very positive (as no cat would expose their belly as they are VERY vulnerable). If I saw it I could tell in a second. What is your take on it?
Oh no, he was just chilling, no bunny kicks. This was when he was trying to get in the bedroom to get to Duncan's food. I kept my hand and arm up. Every once in a while, he would just flop over or lie down and watch Duncan.


"Shockingly enough, Duncan continued eating through all of it." - WOW. Ok, THAT tells me Duncan thought it was nothing. REALLY positive.
That's good!

"Maybe in Indy's eyes, but the screeching made me think it wasn't so much play. I don't know." - Duncan screeched?
Yes, like a super loud, I'm not happy about what's happening here, kind of meow/screech.


"Not sure - they were on the other side of the bed in a flash, so I could only hear, no see." - Ok. How about when you got to them? Those do tend to linger.
Not sure. At the moment, I just wanted to get Indy back in the bathroom.



"I'll try that next time. My main concern was protecting Duncan." - Understandable. Indy does not seem to initially want to hurt Duncan BUT it can escalate so it is understandable. Did you notice any fur flying?
I don't think so, but again - they were on the other side of the bed.


How did Indy act after? And what was his body language like when you licked him up?
He was fine, kind of like a little ragdoll. He wasn't trying to bite or attack me or anything.


I am not at all worried. They will be intro'd successfully. Hard to explain in words but experience just gives a feeling. One just knows. You'll see what I mean shortly.
I hope so. Mama needs her bathroom back! lol
 

calicosrspecial

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Oh no, he was just chilling, no bunny kicks. This was when he was trying to get in the bedroom to get to Duncan's food. I kept my hand and arm up. Every once in a while, he would just flop over or lie down and watch Duncan.




That's good!



Yes, like a super loud, I'm not happy about what's happening here, kind of meow/screech.




Not sure. At the moment, I just wanted to get Indy back in the bathroom.





I don't think so, but again - they were on the other side of the bed.




He was fine, kind of like a little ragdoll. He wasn't trying to bite or attack me or anything.




I hope so. Mama needs her bathroom back! lol
"Oh no, he was just chilling, no bunny kicks. This was when he was trying to get in the bedroom to get to Duncan's food. I kept my hand and arm up. Every once in a while, he would just flop over or lie down and watch Duncan." - Awesome. THAT is REALLY positive. Tells me he doesn't fear Duncan (though I kinda knew that already but reinforces that view).

"That's good!" - TOTALLY AGREE!!!

"Yes, like a super loud, I'm not happy about what's happening here, kind of meow/screech." - OK, yep, took him totally by surprise. I am wondering if it turned out better than he feared at that moment. If so it builds trust.

"Not sure. At the moment, I just wanted to get Indy back in the bathroom." - Understandable. It can be pretty shocking and go by in a blur.

"I don't think so, but again - they were on the other side of the bed. " - You would have probably noticed and if not, they would have acted differently. They would have been cautious, etc.

"He was fine, kind of like a little ragdoll. He wasn't trying to bite or attack me or anything." - REALLY good. If he was in "attack mode" he would not have acted that way. And it does take time for them to get out of that mode.

"I hope so. Mama needs her bathroom back! lol" - YES!!! Just a matter of "when", not "if" in my opinion/experience. I think you are much closer than you may realize.

Keep up the great work!!
 

Beyond Confused

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Tonight:

I played with Indy for about 20 minutes, while I waited for Duncan's meds to kick in. After, I gave them each food. Duncan immediately ate tonight, and he had his back to Indy various times. Indy also ate with his back to Duncan.

After eating, Indy immediately wanted in the bedroom, so he could get to Duncan's food. Duncan hissed and growled several times, but I kept Indy at bay. Eventually, I grabbed the fishing pole toy, and started using it to distract Indy, which worked. Duncan slid between me and the door and skirted past Indy. He made it over to Indy's food bowls and was sniffing around. He hissed a few more times, but by all appearances, he was fine.

I used the pole to entice Indy into the bedroom, since Duncan was now in the hallway. Once inside the bedroom, I shut the door and allowed Duncan out into the living room. Once he was out of the hallway, I led Indy back into the bathroom.

I would say it lasted 15 minutes or so. Overall, it was positive, but at one point, Duncan (with his back to Indy) did jump and look over his shoulder. Once he saw Indy was eating and not even paying attention to him, Duncan walked right to his food bowl and started eating.
 

Beyond Confused

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Lots of hissy fits and growling this morning on Duncan's part. Indy tried to break into the bedroom a few times. Duncan made it into the hallway, and I think a few punches where thrown, but that's all a blur now. I was able to distract Indy with the fishing pole toy, and Duncan ran back into the bedroom and hopped on the bed. He refused to move until I put Indy back in the bathroom.

Duncan's pupils were dilated, but honestly, his eyes look like that a lot, and always have. I've had him well over 11 years. So I don't really know if that's a good gauge for him. His ears weren't back or anything, and he was fine on the bed. He just wouldn't come down.
 

calicosrspecial

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Tonight:

I played with Indy for about 20 minutes, while I waited for Duncan's meds to kick in. After, I gave them each food. Duncan immediately ate tonight, and he had his back to Indy various times. Indy also ate with his back to Duncan.

After eating, Indy immediately wanted in the bedroom, so he could get to Duncan's food. Duncan hissed and growled several times, but I kept Indy at bay. Eventually, I grabbed the fishing pole toy, and started using it to distract Indy, which worked. Duncan slid between me and the door and skirted past Indy. He made it over to Indy's food bowls and was sniffing around. He hissed a few more times, but by all appearances, he was fine.

I used the pole to entice Indy into the bedroom, since Duncan was now in the hallway. Once inside the bedroom, I shut the door and allowed Duncan out into the living room. Once he was out of the hallway, I led Indy back into the bathroom.

I would say it lasted 15 minutes or so. Overall, it was positive, but at one point, Duncan (with his back to Indy) did jump and look over his shoulder. Once he saw Indy was eating and not even paying attention to him, Duncan walked right to his food bowl and started eating.
"Tonight: I played with Indy for about 20 minutes, while I waited for Duncan's meds to kick in." - PERFECT!! Exactly right.

" After, I gave them each food." - Perfect.

" Duncan immediately ate tonight, and he had his back to Indy various times. Indy also ate with his back to Duncan." - This is awesome. A great sign and exactly what we want to see.

"After eating, Indy immediately wanted in the bedroom, so he could get to Duncan's food." - Yep, I see this is what he does.

"Duncan hissed and growled several times, but I kept Indy at bay." - Very good. How was Duncan responding?

" Eventually, I grabbed the fishing pole toy, and started using it to distract Indy, which worked." - :yess: :hyper: :clap2: GREAT job distracting AND VERY positive that Indy was easily distracted. Tells me Indy's intent is not worrying/negative.

"Duncan slid between me and the door and skirted past Indy. He made it over to Indy's food bowls and was sniffing around. He hissed a few more times, but by all appearances, he was fine." - PERFECT. I LOVE that Duncan felt like he could go by Indy. He sniffed safely (no negativity from Indy it sounds). Hissing but Indy didn't escalate, respected the communication. Positive.

"I used the pole to entice Indy into the bedroom, since Duncan was now in the hallway. Once inside the bedroom, I shut the door and allowed Duncan out into the living room. Once he was out of the hallway, I led Indy back into the bathroom." - Great job. Positive association, positive encounters, end on a positive note. Textbook way to do it!! Really well done!!!

"I would say it lasted 15 minutes or so." - GREAT. That is a really good length AND it was quality. Positive.

"Overall, it was positive" - I would characterize it as very positive. Actually almost perfect.

"but at one point, Duncan (with his back to Indy) did jump and look over his shoulder." - Yep, tells us he still doesn't totally trust.

"Once he saw Indy was eating and not even paying attention to him, Duncan walked right to his food bowl and started eating." - And THIS is the key. He was worried and nothing negative happened which builds trust and confidence. This is REALLY a big deal and VERY important.

This Morning:

"Lots of hissy fits and growling this morning on Duncan's part." - Was it because of something Indy did or just preemptive?

"Indy tried to break into the bedroom a few times. Duncan made it into the hallway" - So they swapped? How did they do it?

" and I think a few punches where thrown" - Where?

"but that's all a blur now." - Always is. Did you feel worried? Concerned?

"I was able to distract Indy with the fishing pole toy" - :yess::hyper::clap2: This is REALLY GOOD and really important. It shows Duncan that he is not just "after" him AND it tells us that Indy is not wanting to eliminate Duncan but probably just wants to play with him. So keep doing this distracting.

' and Duncan ran back into the bedroom and hopped on the bed. He refused to move until I put Indy back in the bathroom." - Hmmmmmm. How intense was the "punching"? What was your sense of Duncan's body language?

"Duncan's pupils were dilated, but honestly, his eyes look like that a lot, and always have. I've had him well over 11 years. So I don't really know if that's a good gauge for him. His ears weren't back or anything, and he was fine on the bed." - Ok, that sounds better. I would be surprised if Duncan was "shaken" to a significant degree by the encounter but it is always possible. BUT the fact you say he was "fine" on the bed is a good sign.

So Duncan had a fast rebound in your assessment?

"He just wouldn't come down." - Ok, that is fine. Was he pretty normal otherwise? And Indy was already taken away at that point?

So overall this morning. Sounds fine. Sure not perfect but there are positives. It didn't escalate into real fighting. Indy was distracted which showed Duncan that it isn't a total threat. It seems like Duncan was alright after it. He went high which is good.

Your "tone" which of course is hard to see in posts seems ok which tells me that though it wasn't perfect it doesn't sound like you viewed it as that bad.

Just rinse and repeat. This is all part of the process and I am not at all moved on my confidence.

Keep up the great work!! You honestly did a great job. Textbook actions.

He just wouldn't come down.
 

Beyond Confused

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"Lots of hissy fits and growling this morning on Duncan's part." - Was it because of something Indy did or just preemptive?
Well, Indy was breathing, so.... :lol: I think it was just seeing Indy, mostly preemptive.


"Indy tried to break into the bedroom a few times. Duncan made it into the hallway" - So they swapped? How did they do it?
Duncan just walked around my legs and into the hallway where Indy was.


" and I think a few punches where thrown" - Where?
In the hallway, when Duncan skirted around me.


"but that's all a blur now." - Always is. Did you feel worried? Concerned?
Not really, no.



' and Duncan ran back into the bedroom and hopped on the bed. He refused to move until I put Indy back in the bathroom." - Hmmmmmm. How intense was the "punching"? What was your sense of Duncan's body language?
It wasn't terrible...kind of like it was when Duncan took swipes at Indy the other night, before Indy chased him around the bed.

Duncan's body language when he was on the bed? He was fine, but he had zero interest in hopping down until Indy was back in the bathroom. I was sitting on the floor, and I kept trying to get him to come to me. Normally, he will come running, so this was different. He didn't look freaked out, though.


"Duncan's pupils were dilated, but honestly, his eyes look like that a lot, and always have. I've had him well over 11 years. So I don't really know if that's a good gauge for him. His ears weren't back or anything, and he was fine on the bed." - Ok, that sounds better. I would be surprised if Duncan was "shaken" to a significant degree by the encounter but it is always possible. BUT the fact you say he was "fine" on the bed is a good sign.

So Duncan had a fast rebound in your assessment?

He wasn't a cowering mess, but he wouldn't come to me when I put my hand out. He always comes to me when I do that. This time, he just sat on the bed and refused to hop down until Indy was back in the bathroom.
 

calicosrspecial

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Well, Indy was breathing, so.... :lol: I think it was just seeing Indy, mostly preemptive.




Duncan just walked around my legs and into the hallway where Indy was.




In the hallway, when Duncan skirted around me.




Not really, no.





It wasn't terrible...kind of like it was when Duncan took swipes at Indy the other night, before Indy chased him around the bed.

Duncan's body language when he was on the bed? He was fine, but he had zero interest in hopping down until Indy was back in the bathroom. I was sitting on the floor, and I kept trying to get him to come to me. Normally, he will come running, so this was different. He didn't look freaked out, though.





He wasn't a cowering mess, but he wouldn't come to me when I put my hand out. He always comes to me when I do that. This time, he just sat on the bed and refused to hop down until Indy was back in the bathroom.
"Well, Indy was breathing, so.... :lol: I think it was just seeing Indy, mostly preemptive." - Hahahaha, yep. Actually that is good. Duncan is learning that Indy is not just after him. Duncan's changes in how he responds to Indy's sight, actions, etc will be very telling going forward.

"Duncan just walked around my legs and into the hallway where Indy was." - Interesting. Did he walk normally? Or more cautiously? Either way that is not what a cat that fears another cat would do. That is a good sign.

"In the hallway, when Duncan skirted around me." - You didn't see can;t remember who started it, etc?

"Not really, no." - Ok, good. That is a good sign it wasn't that bad.


It wasn't terrible...kind of like it was when Duncan took swipes at Indy the other night, before Indy chased him around the bed.

"Duncan's body language when he was on the bed? He was fine" - Yes, good.

" but he had zero interest in hopping down until Indy was back in the bathroom. I was sitting on the floor, and I kept trying to get him to come to me. Normally, he will come running, so this was different. He didn't look freaked out, though." - Interesting. I am not sure how to take it. Any idea why? It could be interpreted a few ways. Cats do that all the time. It also could be that he didn't need a "security blanket" - you. Which would be really positive. Could be that he was just cautious given his body language it seems pretty mild, normal caution.

"He wasn't a cowering mess, but he wouldn't come to me when I put my hand out. He always comes to me when I do that. This time, he just sat on the bed and refused to hop down until Indy was back in the bathroom." - Hmmmmm. Interesting he didn't respond to the hand. Understand, I am trying to figure out minutiae here. I don't think this is a big deal at all. Just trying to get the whole picture.

We just have to keep at it. Duncan is resisting BUT accepting. Just takes a little time. once Duncan realizes "he is here to stay" it should move pretty quickly. I get a sense Duncan is about 90% trusting towards him. Just need to finish it off.

Just keep trying to keep it as positive as possible to give Duncan the confidence and trust. There is a lot there already, we just need to finish it off. Keep doing what you are doing, you are doing it exactly correct.


.
 

Beyond Confused

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"Duncan just walked around my legs and into the hallway where Indy was." - Interesting. Did he walk normally? Or more cautiously? Either way that is not what a cat that fears another cat would do. That is a good sign.
Cautiously, but he's the one who chose to go into the hallway.


"In the hallway, when Duncan skirted around me." - You didn't see can;t remember who started it, etc?
nope.
 

Beyond Confused

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this morning:

I'd say it lasted anywhere from 5-10 minutes before I cut it off. Nothing happened, but I wanted to leave it that way.

Duncan ate his breakfast immediately, and so did Indy. Duncan never eats much in one sitting, so as soon as he was done, he tried to head to the hallway. I have no idea what kind of trouble he was looking to start, so I pulled him back into the bedroom. He hung out in there, while Indy continued to chow down. Eventually, I closed the bedroom door, put Indy back in the bathroom, and then I opened the bedroom door to let Duncan out.

It was positive, but I also didn't allow Duncan into the hallway with Indy there. I have a feeling that there would have been hissing, growling, and punches thrown, mostly from Duncan's side. :fireblob: I'm so over this.
 

calicosrspecial

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this morning:

I'd say it lasted anywhere from 5-10 minutes before I cut it off. Nothing happened, but I wanted to leave it that way.

Duncan ate his breakfast immediately, and so did Indy. Duncan never eats much in one sitting, so as soon as he was done, he tried to head to the hallway. I have no idea what kind of trouble he was looking to start, so I pulled him back into the bedroom. He hung out in there, while Indy continued to chow down. Eventually, I closed the bedroom door, put Indy back in the bathroom, and then I opened the bedroom door to let Duncan out.

It was positive, but I also didn't allow Duncan into the hallway with Indy there. I have a feeling that there would have been hissing, growling, and punches thrown, mostly from Duncan's side. :fireblob: I'm so over this.
You didn't try last night?

"I'd say it lasted anywhere from 5-10 minutes before I cut it off. Nothing happened, but I wanted to leave it that way." - That is good. Positive.

"Duncan ate his breakfast immediately, and so did Indy." - :yess: :hyper: :clap2: This is PERFECT!! EXACTLY what we are looking for.

:Duncan never eats much in one sitting, so as soon as he was done, he tried to head to the hallway." - Totally normal. He wants to sniff. No chance he can be distracted?

"I have no idea what kind of trouble he was looking to start" - I don't think he wanted to start trouble. He wanted to see what was in that territory. He is trying to feel confident in that territory and make sure it is just Indy, etc. Totally normal.

"so I pulled him back into the bedroom." - Ok. YOU can let him in there positioning yourself between them (if you can safely) and try to keep it positive.

"He hung out in there, while Indy continued to chow down." - Perfect.

"Eventually, I closed the bedroom door, put Indy back in the bathroom, and then I opened the bedroom door to let Duncan out." - Ok, sounds perfect.

"It was positive, but I also didn't allow Duncan into the hallway with Indy there." - That is fine. Positive association, positive encounter.

"I have a feeling that there would have been hissing, growling, and punches thrown, mostly from Duncan's side " - Probably so you did a good job. Avoiding negativity is a positive.

Hang in there. You are almost through it. You've done the hard part, we just need to finish it off.

Cats take on our emotions so it is really important to stay calm and confident. I think so far you must have as the cats are doing well but as the frustration might grow the cats will pick up on it and the risk of tension increases.

They are doing great, you are doing everything right. Hang in there. Just as it take time to figure out if a roommate is acceptable or who to marry or get an education or build something etc it takes a time to build trust in cats since they are so territorial. They are way ahead of where I thought they would be. You are really close.

I think you did today perfectly.
 

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Take heart! Hissing, growling = communication, almost always happens...swats happen too in intros, it is normal- to me is setting boundaries. You haven't had any fights and there has been a nose greeting, there are many many positives.
You're on a great track!
 

Beyond Confused

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You didn't try last night?
pfft No. I had a super tough workout last night, and I passed out by 8:30. They were lucky they even got food last night!


"so I pulled him back into the bedroom." - Ok. YOU can let him in there positioning yourself between them (if you can safely) and try to keep it positive.
I will try that next time.
 

calicosrspecial

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pfft No. I had a super tough workout last night, and I passed out by 8:30. They were lucky they even got food last night!




I will try that next time.
"pfft No. I had a super tough workout last night, and I passed out by 8:30. They were lucky they even got food last night!" - That is fine. Wow, good for you for getting through the workout!! I am just impressed you workout let alone tough ones!!!

"I will try that next time." - Or in a few days. Whatever you feel comfortable with. It really is all about quality or quantity and making their encounters as positive as possible. I know you may be disappointed in today's session but I think it is spot on. It was spot on every goal that I set when I do intros. Today was good.
 

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Last night:

It didn't last all that long. I got them both set up, and they both ate immediately. Maybe 5 or 6 minutes later, Duncan decided he was done eating, and he was ready to leave the area. He walked around my feet into the hallway and stood my the LR/hallway door. Indy kept eating, but Duncan made sure Indy knew not to try anything funny. He hissed and might've even growled/meowed, but he just stood there, waiting patiently for me to open the door. I opened it, he walked into the LR, and I closed the door. Done.
 

Beyond Confused

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Friday morning:
Started off with breakfast, and both cats ate right away. Then, Duncan decided to move to the hallway door about 5 minutes later. Before I had a chance to let him into the LR, they saw each other, and Duncan started hissing. I'm pretty sure he even spit. It sounded like it.

I had the fishing pole toy in my hand, so I used it on Indy. Duncan immediately ran for the bedroom, around the bed, and then hopped on top. He stayed there the remainder of the time.

Indy and I played with the toy for 5-10 minutes, some in the hallway, some in the bedroom. Duncan watched all of the play time in the bedroom, and I didn't hear any hissing or see any signs of aggression during this time. Eventually, I dragged the toy into the hallway, which I knew Indy wouldn't refuse. He followed it, and I put him back in the bathroom, let Duncan out of the bedroom.

I should also note that something I've been doing for the past week, maybe even a little more, if I've been giving Indy full run of the bathroom, hallway, and bedroom all day, while I'm here in the house. When I go to the gym or run errands, I put him back in the bathroom. My point in saying this is that they still have that baby gate time throughout the day. Most of the time, Indy lays about on the bed, but he does come to the gate occasionally, and Duncan will be on the other side. I don't really hear any uproar during those times.
 

calicosrspecial

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Last night:

It didn't last all that long. I got them both set up, and they both ate immediately. Maybe 5 or 6 minutes later, Duncan decided he was done eating, and he was ready to leave the area. He walked around my feet into the hallway and stood my the LR/hallway door. Indy kept eating, Maybe 5 or 6 minutes later, Duncan decided he was done eating, and he was ready to leave the area. He walked around my feet into the hallway and stood my the LR/hallway door. Indy kept eating,
"Last night:

"I got them both set up, and they both ate immediately." - Perfect.

"Maybe 5 or 6 minutes later, Duncan decided he was done eating, and he was ready to leave the area. He walked around my feet into the hallway and stood my the LR/hallway door. Indy kept eating," - Perfect. I LOVE that Indy was not at all bothered.

"Duncan made sure Indy knew not to try anything funny. He hissed and might've even growled/meowed, but he just stood there, waiting patiently for me to open the door. I opened it, he walked into the LR, and I closed the door. Done." - Great. I love that he told Indy and it seems like Indy respected Duncan. THAT builds Duncan's trust and confidence. That Duncan stood there tells me that is accurate. HE THEN Duncan chooses to move on rather than confront, check out, etc Indy. Acceptance!!! I actually think this encounter is REALLY positive.

"Friday morning:
Started off with breakfast, and both cats ate right away." - AWESOME!!!

"Then, Duncan decided to move to the hallway door about 5 minutes later." - Do you think he is going to the door to see Indy OR is he going there to investigate the hallway?

"Before I had a chance to let him into the LR, they saw each other, and Duncan started hissing. I'm pretty sure he even spit. It sounded like it." - As long as that is all it is and Indy respects it I am not worried. Duncan is telling Indy "don't try anything".

"I had the fishing pole toy in my hand, so I used it on Indy." - AWESOME!!!

"Duncan immediately ran for the bedroom, around the bed, and then hopped on top. He stayed there the remainder of the time." - That is fine. As long as Indy doesn't attack him or focus on him or threaten him it is positive.

"Indy and I played with the toy for 5-10 minutes, some in the hallway, some in the bedroom." - Awesome.

"Duncan watched all of the play time in the bedroom, and I didn't hear any hissing or see any signs of aggression during this time." - THIS is great. It shows that Indy isn't "after" Duncan. It is all about building that trust. Resident cats always have the bigger issue since it is "their" territory being "invaded".

"Eventually, I dragged the toy into the hallway, which I knew Indy wouldn't refuse. He followed it, and I put him back in the bathroom, let Duncan out of the bedroom." - PERFECT. Textbook way of doing it!! GREAT job.

"I should also note that something I've been doing for the past week, maybe even a little more, if I've been giving Indy full run of the bathroom, hallway, and bedroom all day, while I'm here in the house. When I go to the gym or run errands, I put him back in the bathroom. My point in saying this is that they still have that baby gate time throughout the day. Most of the time, Indy lays about on the bed, but he does come to the gate occasionally, and Duncan will be on the other side. I don't really hear any uproar during those times." - WOW. I personally would not have done that yet BUT the result is REALLY positive. They could be having negative encounters at the gate during this time and.or it could cause Duncan some insecurity as some of "his" territory has been "taken away" and that can cause some unease.

Does Duncan typically not go in the bedroom during the day? Pre Indy or when Indy was solely in the bathroom?

I would like to see if you can feed Indy a little more in the bedroom and more away from the hallway. How you achieve that I am not exactly sure. The reason being, I would like to see if Duncan is going towards Indy or if he just wants to check out Indy's territory (the hallway). Keep using distraction as it REALLY helps.

Overall, I would say the last 2 encounters were very positive. Duncan is not being threatened by Indy. Duncan is warning Indy but Indy is behaving which will build Duncan's trust.

Are you noticing any change in Duncan's behavior outside of the encounters with Indy? Any even slight change? And is he health stable?

Also, when you are hanging out in the rest of the house do you have Indy in the bedroom/hallway/bathroom? With you and Duncan in the other parts of the house? And if so, how is Duncan acting during that?

Great job. We just need Duncan to find acceptance. We did see good signs on this update so we are getting there. I think they are very close. We find the hurdle with the resident cat often so what we are seeing is common AND I would say this s going MUCH better than I would have thought. You are almost there. Keep up the great work.
 

Beyond Confused

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"Then, Duncan decided to move to the hallway door about 5 minutes later." - Do you think he is going to the door to see Indy OR is he going there to investigate the hallway?
No, Duncan was done. He'd eaten, and he was ready to get out of the area like last night.


"I should also note that something I've been doing for the past week, maybe even a little more, if I've been giving Indy full run of the bathroom, hallway, and bedroom all day, while I'm here in the house. When I go to the gym or run errands, I put him back in the bathroom. My point in saying this is that they still have that baby gate time throughout the day. Most of the time, Indy lays about on the bed, but he does come to the gate occasionally, and Duncan will be on the other side. I don't really hear any uproar during those times." - WOW. I personally would not have done that yet BUT the result is REALLY positive. They could be having negative encounters at the gate during this time and.or it could cause Duncan some insecurity as some of "his" territory has been "taken away" and that can cause some unease.
Oh, ok. Maybe I'll just put the sheet back down when I let Indy roam.


Does Duncan typically not go in the bedroom during the day? Pre Indy or when Indy was solely in the bathroom?
Nah. He's usually where I am, which is in the sun room. If he ventures out, he stays in the living room in one of the many "nests" I have for him.
He really only hangs out in the bedroom if I'm there, or if it's a super nasty day. I'll keep the room all cozy with the curtains drawn and the bed unmade, much to the dismay of my OCD.


I would like to see if you can feed Indy a little more in the bedroom and more away from the hallway. How you achieve that I am not exactly sure. The reason being, I would like to see if Duncan is going towards Indy or if he just wants to check out Indy's territory (the hallway). Keep using distraction as it REALLY helps.
The other night, when he skirted around the hallway and went near Indy's food bowl, he was definitely wanting to check out Indy's space. Last night, he just wanted out of the area, which is why he sat by the door. Today, I'm not sure. He sat by the door, but he also drew attention to himself by hissing.


Are you noticing any change in Duncan's behavior outside of the encounters with Indy? Any even slight change? And is he health stable?
He's solid - no behavioral or physical changes.


Also, when you are hanging out in the rest of the house do you have Indy in the bedroom/hallway/bathroom? With you and Duncan in the other parts of the house? And if so, how is Duncan acting during that?
Indy can roam between the bathroom/hallway/bedroom. He hasn't tried to jump over the gate since those first two times. That was weeks ago, though.

Duncan is usually wherever I am or sleeping under the dining room table. He also likes to sleep, as I said above, in the various living room nests. He's done those things his whole life. Currently, I'm working in the sun room, and he's sleeping in his carrier in the living room.
 

calicosrspecial

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No, Duncan was done. He'd eaten, and he was ready to get out of the area like last night.




Oh, ok. Maybe I'll just put the sheet back down when I let Indy roam.




Nah. He's usually where I am, which is in the sun room. If he ventures out, he stays in the living room in one of the many "nests" I have for him.
He really only hangs out in the bedroom if I'm there, or if it's a super nasty day. I'll keep the room all cozy with the curtains drawn and the bed unmade, much to the dismay of my OCD.




The other night, when he skirted around the hallway and went near Indy's food bowl, he was definitely wanting to check out Indy's space. Last night, he just wanted out of the area, which is why he sat by the door. Today, I'm not sure. He sat by the door, but he also drew attention to himself by hissing.




He's solid - no behavioral or physical changes.




Indy can roam between the bathroom/hallway/bedroom. He hasn't tried to jump over the gate since those first two times. That was weeks ago, though.

Duncan is usually wherever I am or sleeping under the dining room table. He also likes to sleep, as I said above, in the various living room nests. He's done those things his whole life. Currently, I'm working in the sun room, and he's sleeping in his carrier in the living room.
"No, Duncan was done. He'd eaten, and he was ready to get out of the area like last night." - Awesome. This is great.

"Oh, ok. Maybe I'll just put the sheet back down when I let Indy roam." - So the sheet was not blocking the view during this? Wow, if so it is even more positive than I thought.

"Nah. He's usually where I am, which is in the sun room. If he ventures out, he stays in the living room in one of the many "nests" I have for him." - OK, this is great. Then keep doing what you are doing and if you are around having the sheet up (so visual through the baby gates is fine (just so you can monitor and distract from any potential negative encounter.

"He really only hangs out in the bedroom if I'm there, or if it's a super nasty day. I'll keep the room all cozy with the curtains drawn and the bed unmade, much to the dismay of my OCD." - Ok, great. That is very helpful.

Yes, so I say keep doing what you are doing. If you do go out then I would probably pull down the sheet just to try to avoid any negativity that can't be monitored.

"The other night, when he skirted around the hallway and went near Indy's food bowl, he was definitely wanting to check out Indy's space. Last night, he just wanted out of the area, which is why he sat by the door. Today, I'm not sure. He sat by the door, but he also drew attention to himself by hissing." - Ok, great. SO Indy may not have been the main intent in even the first encounter. This is very helpful. I think Duncan is further along in accepting him.

Let's try moving Indy's food a bit away from the hallway so Duncan can get there without "having to go through" Indy. We'll do a little test.

"He sat by the door, but he also drew attention to himself by hissing." - Just to address. this. And Indy didn't bother with him which builds Duncan's confidence. This is awesome.

"He's solid - no behavioral or physical changes." - YES!!!! This is my biggest concern. It tells me that Duncan is accepting better than we may realize. Whew. This is really a big deal. This is great.

"Indy can roam between the bathroom/hallway/bedroom. He hasn't tried to jump over the gate since those first two times. That was weeks ago, though." - Great. Then at night you are putting him in the bathroom and Duncan comes in your bedroom, correct?

"Duncan is usually wherever I am or sleeping under the dining room table. He also likes to sleep, as I said above, in the various living room nests. He's done those things his whole life. Currently, I'm working in the sun room, and he's sleeping in his carrier in the living room." - Great. This is perfect. So yes, you can keep the sheet up when you are in the house and see how they do.

Duncan sounds like he is accepting more than I realized which is great. Acting normal, not anxious, no health issues/stress. He warns Indy when in close proximity BUT Indy pretty much doesn't respond. We don;t have fighting. Sure we have some hissing and a little batting but no serious blows. Indy isn't attacking. Duncan sees that and it builds confidence.

So I would like to try to reposition Indy's food so Duncan can possibly do what he needs to do without encountering Indy. I would like you to do some distraction with Indy and let Duncan see it. Anytime we can have Indy focused on anything other than Duncan it will build Duncan's confidence. And a confident cat is more likely to accept AND be accepted (though I think Indy has accepted Duncan).

Assuming this next week goes well I think we are going to move forward in 8 days (next weekend). We are going to do sessions in Duncan's territory and see how they do.

I will be asking you "How do you think Duncan would respond to Indy in Duncan's territory?" next week. So keep a close eye on Duncan. Give Duncan some play and extra love in his territory over the next 8 days. Let's build his confidence in there as well. And keep practicing distraction techniques (especially with Indy though it seems really good with him). Anytime we get Indy to focus away from Duncan it is positive and builds Duncan's confidence.

This is a faster timetable than I would normally go BUT I am balancing your desires and the progress so far which has been much better than I expected. And your efforts are giving me confidence as well.

Keep up the great work. I can see the finish line.
 
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