My Cat Suffocated

Fuzzy2348

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 26, 2018
Messages
5
Purraise
20
Good day everyone. Yesterday evening, my beloved cat of 8 years, died. I found him in the backyard with his collar stuck to a tree branch. He had been strangled. It broke my heart for such a wonderful cat to die in such a horrible way. He was my first cat, and I think, my last. I love him with all my heart. In my opinion, the greiving process is different in this situation because of that horrendous death. If anyone has any tips on coping with this kind of loss, please inform me of them. I am struggling very badly. Thank you
 

Mamanyt1953

Rules my home with an iron paw
Staff Member
Forum Helper
Joined
Oct 16, 2015
Messages
31,173
Purraise
67,765
Location
North Carolina
No, it was @Margret who posted that wonderful post, but here is the link:
Grieving

Rest you gentle, Sweet Friend, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

I am so very sorry that you had to lose your beloved cat, and in such a horrible way. I know that right now, this is like a knife in your heart. I hope that someday you will heal enough to honor the love that the two of you shared by giving a home to a cat who desperately needs it, but that is for the future to decide. For now, my heart with yours.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #5

Fuzzy2348

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 26, 2018
Messages
5
Purraise
20
No, it was @Margret who posted that wonderful post, but here is the link:
Grieving

Rest you gentle, Sweet Friend, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

I am so very sorry that you had to lose your beloved cat, and in such a horrible way. I know that right now, this is like a knife in your heart. I hope that someday you will heal enough to honor the love that the two of you shared by giving a home to a cat who desperately needs it, but that is for the future to decide. For now, my heart with yours.
Thank you. This makes me feel a lot better ☺ I know he is in heaven with his brother who also died a few years ago and is having lots of fun
 

les26

Sylvester's daddy
Top Cat
Joined
Nov 19, 2015
Messages
2,414
Purraise
4,862
Location
Emmaus, Pennsylvania
Oh this is just awful, I am so sorry that you all had to go through this horrible thing. Sometimes really bad things like this just happen, we may never know why, but they do, and all we can do is try to cope and hang on.

When I witnessed Sebastian stuck in the mini blinds and having him pass away in my arms after I freed him (he didn't die from that, he had been sick but that didn't help) I was devastated, it played mental and physical games with me as grief can, and my friend who works at the health food store told me about Holy Basil, it is non addicting and it just lets you adapt and deal with the stress better, it is still there but it calms you and you can deal with things better. Perhaps that would help you, I had no side effects and I am pretty sensitive to them so you should be just fine but you might want to give it a try.

Time will help you deal with this, but it will be just awful for quite awhile which is normal. I remember for quite some time after that happened, I had a very hard time being near the mini blinds or even looking at them, but now almost 3 years later I have no issues; I still recall that awful night but it has lost much of it's sting, both kitties are just fine now no problems, just fine and we will see them again someday and it will be glorious.

"Their last breath on Earth is their first breath in Heaven" :rbheart:

I hope that your heart heals a bit more each day, God Bless.....:alright: :grouphug: :rbheart:
 

di and bob

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Dec 12, 2012
Messages
16,582
Purraise
22,958
Location
Nebraska, USA
To have a beloved family member die in such a horrible accident is a tragedy. But I hope you remember it WAS an accident. You cannot be guilty of something in which you had no intent of happening. You would have prevented it at any cost if you would have had an inkling of what could happen. My little girl was killed not ten feet from me on a busy street, so I know the feelings of horror and guilt that mark your soul forever. You never get over something like this, you learn to live with it. The guilt I felt was slowly killing me, until I started to converse with people like you and give what comfort I could that can only come from someone who has been there. It helped to save me by giving comfort to others.
First of all, you shared a bond with that little boy that can never be taken from you. He loves you just as much as you love him and would never want you to be so sad because of his leaving. Just as you would want if you were the first to go, he wants only happiness and joy in your future, because that is what love is. always remember..."death cannot take that which never dies" and that is the love you will always hold for him.He was in your life for a little while, and there was a reason for him being there. To share your love.
No matter how much it hurts right now, to have never known his love at all would be unthinkable.
Time is the only thing that helps to dull the sharp edged of grief, keep busy and try not to dwell on his end, but on what he brought to you by sharing your life. Don't let his death be more meaningful than his life, his life was so much more important.
My heart goes out to you, i know exactly the feelings you are having and wouldn't wish them on anyone. If you need to talk I am here, please click on my avatar and then start a conversation, that is private messaging. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers, you will be blessed for hurting so much from loving that precious boy. Take care of yourself.....RIP beautiful little one. You will never be forgotten and will have a secure place in a loving heart for eternity. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #9

Fuzzy2348

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 26, 2018
Messages
5
Purraise
20
Oh this is just awful, I am so sorry that you all had to go through this horrible thing. Sometimes really bad things like this just happen, we may never know why, but they do, and all we can do is try to cope and hang on.

When I witnessed Sebastian stuck in the mini blinds and having him pass away in my arms after I freed him (he didn't die from that, he had been sick but that didn't help) I was devastated, it played mental and physical games with me as grief can, and my friend who works at the health food store told me about Holy Basil, it is non addicting and it just lets you adapt and deal with the stress better, it is still there but it calms you and you can deal with things better. Perhaps that would help you, I had no side effects and I am pretty sensitive to them so you should be just fine but you might want to give it a try.

Time will help you deal with this, but it will be just awful for quite awhile which is normal. I remember for quite some time after that happened, I had a very hard time being near the mini blinds or even looking at them, but now almost 3 years later I have no issues; I still recall that awful night but it has lost much of it's sting, both kitties are just fine now no problems, just fine and we will see them again someday and it will be glorious.

"Their last breath on Earth is their first breath in Heaven" :rbheart:

I hope that your heart heals a bit more each day, God Bless.....:alright: :grouphug: :rbheart:
Thank you so much♥ I visited his grave today and had a good cry. I think if I do this enough, I will be able to overcome the sadness and be filled with happy memories instead.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #10

Fuzzy2348

TCS Member
Thread starter
Kitten
Joined
Jul 26, 2018
Messages
5
Purraise
20
To have a beloved family member die in such a horrible accident is a tragedy. But I hope you remember it WAS an accident. You cannot be guilty of something in which you had no intent of happening. You would have prevented it at any cost if you would have had an inkling of what could happen. My little girl was killed not ten feet from me on a busy street, so I know the feelings of horror and guilt that mark your soul forever. You never get over something like this, you learn to live with it. The guilt I felt was slowly killing me, until I started to converse with people like you and give what comfort I could that can only come from someone who has been there. It helped to save me by giving comfort to others.
First of all, you shared a bond with that little boy that can never be taken from you. He loves you just as much as you love him and would never want you to be so sad because of his leaving. Just as you would want if you were the first to go, he wants only happiness and joy in your future, because that is what love is. always remember..."death cannot take that which never dies" and that is the love you will always hold for him.He was in your life for a little while, and there was a reason for him being there. To share your love.
No matter how much it hurts right now, to have never known his love at all would be unthinkable.
Time is the only thing that helps to dull the sharp edged of grief, keep busy and try not to dwell on his end, but on what he brought to you by sharing your life. Don't let his death be more meaningful than his life, his life was so much more important.
My heart goes out to you, i know exactly the feelings you are having and wouldn't wish them on anyone. If you need to talk I am here, please click on my avatar and then start a conversation, that is private messaging. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers, you will be blessed for hurting so much from loving that precious boy. Take care of yourself.....RIP beautiful little one. You will never be forgotten and will have a secure place in a loving heart for eternity. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!
Thank you! I will message you
 

wt1964

TCS Member
Young Cat
Joined
May 2, 2013
Messages
80
Purraise
252
My deepest sympathies. This is precisely why I decided against a collar for my Lucy. She wore one briefly as a kitten, but I was afraid of just such an event happening to her, so although she was an indoor cat, she loved going out, and I never let her do so without being on a harness and a leash. Even if she happened to get away from me with the leash attached, there was no way she could be strangled. She was with me for almost 20 years.

Terrible lesson to learn.
 

flory

TCS Member
Kitten
Joined
Aug 4, 2018
Messages
10
Purraise
29
What a terrible loss. I am so, so sorry. Your heart must be breaking. Some really important and loving messages above which I hope you will find some comfort in. Please try to remember that you had nothing but love for him and never intended him any harm. I am grieving the very recent loss of my cat, and am trying to do the exact same thing. You loved him with all your heart, and he knows that. Sending warm thoughts your way.
 

tarasgirl06

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 19, 2006
Messages
24,708
Purraise
64,893
Location
Glendale, CATifornia
Good day everyone. Yesterday evening, my beloved cat of 8 years, died. I found him in the backyard with his collar stuck to a tree branch. He had been strangled. It broke my heart for such a wonderful cat to die in such a horrible way. He was my first cat, and I think, my last. I love him with all my heart. In my opinion, the greiving process is different in this situation because of that horrendous death. If anyone has any tips on coping with this kind of loss, please inform me of them. I am struggling very badly. Thank you
My heartfelt condolences for your loss, F Fuzzy2348 and I can well understand your anguish. Know that he is free now and that he watches over you, knowing your love for him will go on through the time when you are reunited, never again to part.
Though you have said you may never be able to share life with another cat, and though I respect your feelings, here are my thoughts:
Cats are givers of unconditional loyalty and love. Their love is very pure. They are very social creatures, and many bond deeply not only with their human family members, but with their fellow feline family members and/or others. It is my feeling that when one of my loved ones ascends, they want me to share the caring, safe home, and love I gave them with another cat in need, of whom there are so many. So in time, when I am able, I do adopt again. I have also paid tribute to those I have lost by planting a plant for them, either above their resting place or just in the yard, as a living memorial. Sometimes when I have been able, I have donated to a cat advocacy group such as Alley Cat Allies, which helps cats and educates people about them. I make a photo album of pictures of my beloved one so that I may be comforted revisiting the wonderful memories of our lives together.
I also believe in always keeping cats indoors only, unless you have a secure catio that they can be safe in, or if they will walk on a cat harness and leash with you. And I do collar and tag all of my cats, with safety collars only. These collars are the only ones recommended for cats as they break away under pressure.
May these thoughts bring you some comfort. Frankie loves you and watches over you. Know that.
 

NY cat man

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Aug 6, 2018
Messages
7,033
Purraise
21,284
My heartfelt condolences for your loss, F Fuzzy2348 and I can well understand your anguish. Know that he is free now and that he watches over you, knowing your love for him will go on through the time when you are reunited, never again to part.
Though you have said you may never be able to share life with another cat, and though I respect your feelings, here are my thoughts:
Cats are givers of unconditional loyalty and love. Their love is very pure. They are very social creatures, and many bond deeply not only with their human family members, but with their fellow feline family members and/or others. It is my feeling that when one of my loved ones ascends, they want me to share the caring, safe home, and love I gave them with another cat in need, of whom there are so many. So in time, when I am able, I do adopt again. I have also paid tribute to those I have lost by planting a plant for them, either above their resting place or just in the yard, as a living memorial. Sometimes when I have been able, I have donated to a cat advocacy group such as Alley Cat Allies, which helps cats and educates people about them. I make a photo album of pictures of my beloved one so that I may be comforted revisiting the wonderful memories of our lives together.
I also believe in always keeping cats indoors only, unless you have a secure catio that they can be safe in, or if they will walk on a cat harness and leash with you. And I do collar and tag all of my cats, with safety collars only. These collars are the only ones recommended for cats as they break away under pressure.
May these thoughts bring you some comfort. Frankie loves you and watches over you. Know that.
In 2004, when her father died, my wife and I 'inherited' Spooky, a short-haired Tuxedo. He was 20 years old at the time, having been dumped out in the country as a kitten. Over time, he developed arthritis, and then went blind, but he still got around. One day, he came upstairs, which he seldom did, and got up on the bed with my wife. She said he curled up next to her, started purring, gave a little shiver, and was gone..
I built a coffin for him, wrapped him in his favorite blanked, and buried him in the back yard, in a spot where the sun shines early and late.
My wife said then "No more cats" She didn'the want to go through that again. So guess what? We have 5, and a feral that has adopted US. Give it time, and you may well change your mind, at least I hope so.
 

tarasgirl06

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 19, 2006
Messages
24,708
Purraise
64,893
Location
Glendale, CATifornia
In 2004, when her father died, my wife and I 'inherited' Spooky, a short-haired Tuxedo. He was 20 years old at the time, having been dumped out in the country as a kitten. Over time, he developed arthritis, and then went blind, but he still got around. One day, he came upstairs, which he seldom did, and got up on the bed with my wife. She said he curled up next to her, started purring, gave a little shiver, and was gone..
I built a coffin for him, wrapped him in his favorite blanked, and buried him in the back yard, in a spot where the sun shines early and late.
My wife said then "No more cats" She didn'the want to go through that again. So guess what? We have 5, and a feral that has adopted US. Give it time, and you may well change your mind, at least I hope so.
What a beautiful account, and what a wonderful tribute to Spooky, who I am positive is watching over you all and very proud of you for sharing the love and good care you gave him with other deserving, loving cats! This is what I do, too. It not only carries on that legacy of love, it also helps to heal my heart a little bit, and those of the other feline family members who miss the one who has gone on.
 

NY cat man

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Aug 6, 2018
Messages
7,033
Purraise
21,284
What a beautiful account, and what a wonderful tribute to Spooky, who I am positive is watching over you all and very proud of you for sharing the love and good care you gave him with other deserving, loving cats! This is what I do, too. It not only carries on that legacy of love, it also helps to heal my heart a little bit, and those of the other feline family members who miss the one who has gone on.
I think it hit Michele (my wife) especially hard to lose Spooky because he was the last link to her deceased parents. I well remember her sobbing as she told me about it, and what can you say that doesn't sound corny or Trite? All you can do is to be someone to lean on, because sometimes silence carries more weight than words.
 

tarasgirl06

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 19, 2006
Messages
24,708
Purraise
64,893
Location
Glendale, CATifornia
I think it hit Michele (my wife) especially hard to lose Spooky because he was the last link to her deceased parents. I well remember her sobbing as she told me about it, and what can you say that doesn't sound corny or Trite? All you can do is to be someone to lean on, because sometimes silence carries more weight than words.
Sometimes words are inadequate. Gestures, and emotional support, are priceless, though.
 

gareth

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Dec 19, 2003
Messages
1,516
Purraise
3,858
Location
UK
Good day everyone. Yesterday evening, my beloved cat of 8 years, died. I found him in the backyard with his collar stuck to a tree branch. He had been strangled. It broke my heart for such a wonderful cat to die in such a horrible way. He was my first cat, and I think, my last. I love him with all my heart. In my opinion, the greiving process is different in this situation because of that horrendous death. If anyone has any tips on coping with this kind of loss, please inform me of them. I am struggling very badly. Thank you
Jesus that sounds awful, I'm so sorry. I genuinely believe you don't deal with grief, you just keep going and somehow survive it. The only advie I have is to be gentle on yourself. Let yourself grieve. It's a rough ride, but you WILL make it.
 
Top