When the moment comes...

[lily paddy]

That was beautiful Thank you.. 

 

[lindas1219]

I made that painful decision with my cat, Sammi just a couple days ago.  She gave me 17 years of her life and she was like my kid.  I am still hurting terribly and I found this site and knowing that there are others in my situation has helped me a lot .  Thank you.

 

[jennyr]

That was beautiful Thank you.. 

I made that painful decision with my cat, Sammi just a couple days ago.  She gave me 17 years of her life and she was like my kid.  I am still hurting terribly and I found this site and knowing that there are others in my situation has helped me a lot .  Thank you.

To both of you, and all others who have recently gone through this, I feel your pain. I have lost two beloved cats this last year, one at 8 years old from heart failure, the other at 14 from stomach cancer. I only had to make the decision for my Persil, and felt so guilty, not for making it but for not seeing sooner what I should have seen, and leaving it too late. Three months later, I am still crying for her.

I found it helped me a lot to write a tribute to her in the forum here, 'Crossing the Bridge', explaining all about her, what made her special to me and our life journey together. I do recommend to both of you, even though you are new members, to do something like that, it was painful but very therapeutic, and I know that in the future, when I can think about it without tears, that I will have something to treasure. I felt I owed it to her. Please write tributes - they will be read and appreciated by those who know what you are going through.

 

[lily paddy]

Thank you so much JennyR.. i still am at the point where i cant speak or think of my baby JAxx without tears.. When i can get there.. i will tell and share how wonderful my baby... i cant.. ( I had to type ....my baby WAS.. and it brought me back to tears ).. 

 

[rosiejones]

Omg thank u so much for this.everything u say is true. I miss her so much we had such a bond between us she would often head butt me come for a fuss love her cheeks being rubed. For about a month now she had deteriorated she used to sleep in her bed in the bedroom would spoil her with chicken and her favourite tuna. Taking her to the vets to be put down was the hardest decision I've had to make although I wanted her at home in the last few hrs she was suffering. My husband took her to vets I was so heart broken I couldn't even say goodbye. Haven't even slept in the room she was in yet. I hope there is a rainbow bridge where she is happy and content and I hope one day I will see her again. Thank u so much for this reading I can relate to this. Xx

 

[jennyr]

Thank you so much JennyR.. i still am at the point where i cant speak or think of my baby JAxx without tears.. When i can get there.. i will tell and share how wonderful my baby... i cant.. ( I had to type ....my baby WAS.. and it brought me back to tears ).. 

Omg thank u so much for this.everything u say is true. I miss her so much we had such a bond between us she would often head butt me come for a fuss love her cheeks being rubed. For about a month now she had deteriorated she used to sleep in her bed in the bedroom would spoil her with chicken and her favourite tuna. Taking her to the vets to be put down was the hardest decision I've had to make although I wanted her at home in the last few hrs she was suffering. My husband took her to vets I was so heart broken I couldn't even say goodbye. Haven't even slept in the room she was in yet. I hope there is a rainbow bridge where she is happy and content and I hope one day I will see her again. Thank u so much for this reading I can relate to this. Xx

Many hugs to both of you.

 

[ilovecloudy]

This made me feel a little bit of reassurance. My cat was put down yesterday, my beloved best friend since childhood. He was in pain.. But I feel that he had a little more time left. His life was cut short abruptly. I wish I had more time with him. I am beyond miserable. My heart aches and longs for his presence. I feel like a murderer, that I should've stopped the whole thing and been some kind of hero. I just want to hear his meow one more time.. Hold him, pet him, tell him I love him, that everything's gonna be alright. But I'll never wake up to him on my kitchen table meowing and begging for attention or food.. This house is so empty. I don't know how to cope, I just keep sobbing and sobbing, filling myself with guilt and depression. I miss him so much. I've never experienced any greater pain.

 

[jennyr]

This made me feel a little bit of reassurance. My cat was put down yesterday, my beloved best friend since childhood. He was in pain.. But I feel that he had a little more time left. His life was cut short abruptly. I wish I had more time with him. I am beyond miserable. My heart aches and longs for his presence. I feel like a murderer, that I should've stopped the whole thing and been some kind of hero. I just want to hear his meow one more time.. Hold him, pet him, tell him I love him, that everything's gonna be alright. But I'll never wake up to him on my kitchen table meowing and begging for attention or food.. This house is so empty. I don't know how to cope, I just keep sobbing and sobbing, filling myself with guilt and depression. I miss him so much. I've never experienced any greater pain.

AS you have read above, many of us have been thro9ugh what you are going through now, and it is awful. But I think you have to put yourself into the mind of your cat. He was ill, he was in pain, he didn't know how to tell you, how to make it stop. Every day he continued it would have been worse, and no amount of your holding him or petting him would have taken that away. He will never feel pain again, never be frightened. It is the last and best and bravest thing any owner can do, to put away the selfish feelings that make us want to hang on, in favour of releasing someone we love from all anguish. I am sure he knew you loved him, cared for him, and he would not want you to wish any more pain on him, though it means pain for yourself. Be happy for him, even though your heart is breaking.

 

[ilovecloudy]

Thank you for that. My father and sister and I agree. You are right. I just wish this pain would go away

 

[jennyr]

Feeling pain right now is the natural thing. But it will lessen, you will get through it, and eventually you will start to remember the happy things more than the sad ones. But there will always be times when you feel bad - that mix of emotions is what makes us humans and gives us compassion.

 

[ilovecloudy]

I just wish I didn't feel like such a murderer.

 

[kmd]

This made me feel a little bit of reassurance. My cat was put down yesterday, my beloved best friend since childhood. He was in pain.. But I feel that he had a little more time left. His life was cut short abruptly. I wish I had more time with him. I am beyond miserable. My heart aches and longs for his presence. I feel like a murderer, that I should've stopped the whole thing and been some kind of hero. I just want to hear his meow one more time.. Hold him, pet him, tell him I love him, that everything's gonna be alright. But I'll never wake up to him on my kitchen table meowing and begging for attention or food.. This house is so empty. I don't know how to cope, I just keep sobbing and sobbing, filling myself with guilt and depression. I miss him so much. I've never experienced any greater pain.

Gosh, this hurts to read... and most of us here can relate... I will tell you something I read when I was searching for answers with our euthanasia decisions days later, online, I read where a veterinarian said, "Better a week too early than an hour too late...". Sympathy to you, I have never had a human death that hurt or touched me as deeply as our 2 cat deaths in recent years.

 

[ilovecloudy]

kmd
I suppose that it is better a week too early than an hour too late.. I didn't want him to suffer.. I just keep believing there was something more that could have been done.. I feel so guilty for all of this. I should've caught it earlier and done more for him.. I am so depressed. I don't know what to do with myself

 

[mama africa]

Some pictures of Lotje, my late female cat. I adopted her as a shelter cat in november 1990, when she was about 7 months. She passed away in february 2011. We shared a lot and moved to different places, but she never lost her way or her loyalty.

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• mama africa
• Feb 7, 2017

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• mama africa
• Feb 7, 2017

 

[redlockeddoc]

Thank you so much. There are so many "heroic" treatments on these threads and videos, but sometimes I think the bravest thing to do is to make the decision that it is time for euthanasia. My wonderful vet is coming to my house tomorrow morning and I will have to say goodbye to my beloved Nite-Nite. Thank you so much for your piece. I am drawing such comfort from it.

 

[lisajo]

This is crazy, I forgot all about this website and I wondered what had happened.

Exactly one year ago, I wrote about my dog Dixie. She is still with us, I just wonder why and started to say goodby

at that time. and for some reason the nice lady with Chito replied and it showed up in my mail tonite.

Now it is my young cat Holiday I need to worry about. 

Two years ago I went to the pet petstore and brought 4 cats in to be vaccinated and microchipped.

The microchip in Holiday migrated and then popped out of her skin.

She likes to sit on the porch and I thought I was doing the  right thing by vacc. her

It was a 3-yr. and she reacted by having itchy skin.

So she was given antihistamine pills, which made her sleepy and she grew to resent the pilling.

Then a steroid shot which relieved her itchiness for she had licked her fur off her cute tummy and

some of her tail and legs, poor baby.

Then a lump at the injection site.

It is rare to get cancer from a vacc. but now she probably has it and it is due to the metal in the vacc.

She had a fine aspiration done with no sign of bad cells, now she will have a biopsy.

My heart is broken already.

I will fight the guilt I feel and hope for a miracle for my seet Holiday.

 

[lisajo]

I am so sorry for your loss, I know that loss is hard and sad. Give yourself some time and maybe you can have another 

kitty to love, a kitty who is in need of a love that only you can give.

I lost my tiny rat terrier when she chased a truck and I found her in the street. It was sad and it was my fault.

I cried so much I got a migraine and went to the hospital, they gave me something to sleep.

Five days later, I went to the farm and got a puppy rat terrier, she help mend my broken heart.

She is now 15 and her birthday is in June.

Please think about a kitten or a kitty longing for a warm place to sleep on your bed.

I hope you are feeling better my dear.

 

[PennyRaj]

Such a beautiful post that I had to sign up to The Cat Site.

I am so moved by so many comments and posts s I dread this day and decision coming near.

 

[redlockeddoc]

A note for those who have lost a cat, or are worrying about when that moment comes.

When we decide to share our lives with a cat, we are making a decision to break our own hearts. That's not melodrama. At some point, that bundle of fur will get under your skin. It doesn't matter how big and tough you are. I've seen British Army Special Forces soldiers cradling their beloved cats with tears in their eyes, hoping against hope that something will put off that fateful moment when they must part. I've seen busy mothers of five children who rule their household with an iron fist reduced to bawling children because they miss their cat. At some point, that cat will work its magic. Its eyes will connect with yours. Its head will rub against yours. Its heart will connect with yours. At that point, you secretly swear your devotion to the animal. It comes under your protection, and you will sacrifice anything to keep it safe. In return, the cat will share that look with you. The one that says "I love you too". That's a special gift, and unless you have been loved by a cat, it is a meaningless one. But if you HAVE been loved by a cat, then you know the value of that gift. It means that the cat will give you a lifetime of love. They will literally spend their entire life in your company. You will feed them, protect them, keep them warm and safe. And they will give you their entire life.

Their entire life. That's their commitment. And what is yours? Easy, you commit to the knowledge that at some point in the future you will be given a terrible decision to make. That decision will be the last you make for your cat. That decision will result in a transference of pain and suffering. You will take away all the pain and suffering of your cat, and you will begin a process of pain and suffering yourself. That's the price for the look. When they look in your eyes with love, that terrible decision is the price. It's a moment that all cat owners dread, but a moment that comes to us all.

So should we feel bad when our cat passes on? Of course we should. We are losing someone we loved, and someone that loved us. The grief will be terrible, but it will be transient. It WILL pass. You will then be left with memories. Some of these memories will bring you tears. Some of these memories will make you laugh. But the pain and the suffering will fade.

So when the moment comes, you have to find a strength within yourself. You're about to do something incredible. You're about to give a display of love and devotion rarely equalled. You will be given a decision about whether to allow your pet to suffer and thus save your own pain, or whether to remove all pain and suffering from the cat, and take it on yourself. If the time is right, you will know, and you will make the right decision. And then you should be so proud of yourself. In the midst of your own grief, and suffering, you should take such strength from the knowledge that when the moment came, you decided to choose your cat's welfare in favour of your own. What greater love can any pet owner display?

So for those that think they have to make that decision soon, take strength. Know that your moment has come. The moment where you wrap up all the love and devotion you have for your cat into one incredible moment and do what's right. For those on the other side of that decision, then well done. I'm proud of you, and your cat would be proud of you, too. Your cat is forever pain-free. You are in pain, but I promise it will pass. Don't worry, some of us know how bad that pain is. You are not alone, and we know how much it hurts. It's terrible, but it will pass. Then you will have the memories, which you should treasure.

I like to think one day I will be re-united with my pets. There will be no crashing together as we run towards each other as in the rainbow bridge poem. There will be no kisses. We will simply give each other that look. The look that says "I love you, and now I know how much you love me"

I know you have heard it so many times. The beautiful, loving and incredibly empathic essay/letter you wrote healed my heart both before and after my heart-rinding decision. It has spead through-out the world. It has been such a gift. Thank you.

 

[gareth]

Some pictures of Lotje, my late female cat. I adopted her as a shelter cat in november 1990, when she was about 7 months. She passed away in february 2011. We shared a lot and moved to different places, but she never lost her way or her loyalty.

016.jpg

• mama africa
• Feb 7, 2017

015.jpg

• mama africa
• Feb 7, 2017

really pretty girl